


Solomon

by KowabangaDude



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon
Genre: Family Drama, Gen, Teenage Drama
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-19
Updated: 2015-07-19
Packaged: 2018-04-10 04:48:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 46,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4377767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KowabangaDude/pseuds/KowabangaDude
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hotaru Tomoe remembers her past as Sailor Saturn: how it cost her her life, her parents' life, and almost meant the end of everything. Worst still she remembers her adoptive parents meant to kill her once; she doesn't take it well.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Solomon

**Author's Note:**

> This is a slight AU where the Senshi's adventures are meant to be finished after the S season.
> 
> Also I must apologize for two things in advance:
> 
> 1 - This is copy and pasted straight out of Word, and unfortunately the paragraphs are meshed together. I'll divide this into proper chapters later when I get the time. Guess at least I'll try to use a different text program next time. (On the plus side, the three asterisks that separates scenes was kept, unlike in FF.net)
> 
> 2 - This hasn't been proofread yet, so there'll be writing and grammar mistakes galore.

“SO WHAT DO YOU THINK, GIRLS!?”  
Haruka yelled joyously. Putting pedal to the metal and stretching her face out of the convertible Ferrari 512 TR, her right arm leaning on the front door and her left hand resting on the steering wheel, the hood of the car sinking due to the engine’s power.  
“PUURS LIKE A KITTEN!”  
Natsumi - the mechanic and owner of the garage - was just in front of the open hood supervising everything. She still wasn’t sure of what to make of this intricate sports car engine, but the challenge had intrigued her. Haruka had continued her repeated pressing of the accelerator back and forth, leaving it still at its farthest reach in short intervals.  
“SHAKES LIKE AN EARTHQUAKE!”  
So excited at all the horsepower she was mustering, Haruka held down the accelerator in one last exhibition of raw power, and it was then that a loud bang was heard and fumes could be seen slowly coming out of the hood with their unmistakable hissing sound.  
Once the initial shock passed, Hotaru added nonchalantly:  
“And blows up like a volcano.”  
“Oh my god Natsumi! Are you alright!?” asked Haruka as she opened the door and stepped out of the car.  
Natsumi stepped aside from behind the hood, her entire frontal body pitch black. She held her hand in front of her mouth trying to contain her incessant coughing. But she hand waved to show she was alright.  
“Ah, man! I so thought it was gonna work this time.” Haruka kicked under the door in frustration. Then leaned herself against it with her arms, sulking.  
“Why don’t you just take it to an authorized repair shop? Aren’t Ferrari’s so special they demand their own trained mechanics?” Finally said Chibi-usa, who was tagging along.  
“Huh? Are you kidding!? You know how much those uppity noses charge just to look at your car?” Said Haruka, turning around with an aghast face.  
Hotaru was confused for a moment, which showed on her wrinkled face. Then she added: “It’s not like you can’t afford it…”  
“No… no! Michiru raised a very clear bar on my spending habits.”She turned around towards the car again, hands on her hips.  
“Since…”  
“Since you…” Haruka began to gesticulate with her hands, but stopped abruptly and slowly turned her head to reveal her uneasy smile “Er… since you came into our lifes, sweety!”  
“Really?” Hotaru crossed her arms, raising an eyebrow “I never heard of it…”  
“Well, I think she wanted to invest in your education. She told me” Haruka began a poor mock imitation of Michiru’s voice “Haruka, when someone spends that much money on a car that car becomes as if her child. You have a new child now, one that will require far more than new tyres and oil-changes. And for heaven’s sake, no more helicopters! Ara!”  
Hotaru heard every little word of it, and throwing her head to the side in feigned charm replied:  
“You still could afford it, though. You’re filthy rich.”  
Chibi-usa watched the two go at it, not sure of what she was witnessing.  
Haruka, now clearly aggravated by this conversation, turned around, threw her hands up in the air and said: “Oh yeah! How would you know!? I don’t know what’s on your mother’s mind! Nobody does! I think maybe she also wanted to start a business with you… God! You’re beginning to sound more like her every day!”  
Haruka finally trotted for the hood, squeezing her eyes to try and see through the smoke and make something out of the mess.  
“When I remember this thing didn’t even come with a proper air filter… It’s like someone disassembled everything and let a monkey put it all back into place!”  
Haruka was getting lost in herself again as she threw her head back and let her hand rest over her forehead, pulling her hair out of the way.  
“Man, I miss the old yellow convertible Ferrari!” She looked down at the hood once more “And I thought I had made such a good deal on this used babe too… I should’ve known: easy comes, easy goes.”  
Hotaru watched, and closing her eyes moved a strand of hair out of her face and pushed all her back hair into the air in one single motion.  
“I’m sorry you have to go through so much misery because of me…”  
Haruka was a little annoyed at what she perceived as petulance, but she didn’t show. Instead she decided to throw the ball right back at Hotaru’s field and asked:  
“By the way, you’re starting your second year of senior high school year tomorrow, right? Have you figured out what you’re gonna try for college yet?”  
“Huh?” Hotaru faltered, taking the bait and feeling self-conscious “I… I don’t know yet. I always thought a lot about becoming a nurse, but now I’m also thinking of doing architecture. It mixes art with calculus, a good balance you know?”  
“Yeah. Good for you.” Haruka didn’t bother hiding her indifference.  
It was true: Hotaru was sixteen now and in High School. She wore a dark red skirt, a black shirt, a checkered fading red and gray coat, long black socks and her trademark red beret. She wanted to avoid at all costs the goth look everyone thought she would go for, but in the end dark colors always spoke to her. She wore a short black crucifix necklace as well. Not because she was particularly pious or even religious, but rather because the concept of saving grace soothed her. She had the mien of a beautiful young woman, her fragile look adding to her femininity.  
Chibiusa was next to her wearing the exact same clothes in honor of her friend, down to the beret, but not the crucifix. Though she was slightly shorter than Hotaru she also would turn 16 this year; her face more slender now, different from her younger plump days.  
“Hotaru, how are we supposed to have our last vacation day out now?” She asked.  
“My guess is we won’t. I don’t know why Haruka-papa has to go with the fancy cars. Michiru would kill her if she knew she was speeding with us in it anyway” she teased Haruka once more.  
“Hey, it’s an acquired taste!” Haruka retorted “I’d like to see what sort of cart you’ll be riding when it gets to be your turn! Why, Michiru will probably pick it for you anyway. If I know her, she’ll pretend to give you the power of choice by letting you pick between two family cars. I’m not the only one on a leash you know...”  
“Yes you are. She claims that’s how you like it” she put her hands on her chin and giggled softly.  
Chibiusa was again confused by all this.  
“And besides, I’ll be well on my way by them.” She paused dramatically, opening her eyes to declare her latest resolve. “I intend to study abroad.”  
Haruka hesitated for a moment, surprised by what she heard.  
“Oh… that’s too bad hon.” Haruka scratched her head “I’ll miss you. Michiru will sure miss you. ..”  
Chibiusa had enough, and interrupted.  
“Hotaru, can we just go now? We don’t have all day, and it’s our last one too!” she protested.  
“Right, I suppose we’ll just have to take the bus then!”  
Chibiusa raced for the garage entrance while Hotaru tilted her head and gave away one last smile to show off her typical young girl charm before dashing after Chibiusa.  
“You just wait and see! This car will be repaired and then we’ll turn a lot of heads on the streets! I’ll get my money’s worth! You’ll see!” Haruka shouted with her hands around her mouth as the two teenagers disappeared from sight.  
“Well! We’re gonna have to figure this one out ourselves, right Natsumi!?  
She waved at her mechanic friend who waved back, still coughing and cleaning herself with tissue paper.

***

“Hotaru, let’s go to “Bar Baby Queen”!”  
“But a bar, Chibiusa?”  
“A nightclub, really. It won’t be too crowded at this time of the day. And they got this huge disco floor we can dance on! And besides, Minako works there! It’s how I know it.”  
“But we’re underage.”  
“Nobody really asks for ID over there, especially not if we go there early. And Minako would stand by us anyway. I’m sure of it!”  
Hotaru agreed. Chibiusa told her on the way how Minako was trying to get her big break in the music business by joining any girl entertainment group that would take her in. She had tried girl bands, girl ice skating performance groups, girl tap-dancing groups, female wrestling, Takarazuka theaters, and even became a geisha in training for a short while. That last one ended on a particularly disastrous note.  
Eventually she settled for “Bar Baby Queen” for the time being, where there was a stage for performers and she had secured a singing routine every Tuesday, today, with her eccentric keyboardist, DJ and stage producer partner that she met while working there. Her looks would attract new male customers, and her personality would often have her building rapport with the customers. Meanwhile her partner would try to get some recognition from the audience. Minako, of course, had plans of her own and was just waiting for a bigshot somewhere to notice her or something better to show up. However, she was also a table waiter Tuesdays and all other days of the weeks and had to open, clean up and tidy up the place at late hours when customers were leaving before calling the day off. That would usually be at daybreak.  
When they arrived at the underground bar & nightclub it was almost empty, only a few couples and one group of friends lounging in the back chairs in the darker corners and a couple of apron-wearing waiters prepping the tables. Chibiusa called out to Minako who was one of these waiters.  
“I see you brought little Hotaru with you into our sin hole this time” she said, smiling “Please make yourself confortable at our humble inn!” She bowed, mockingly, one arm on her chest while the other was kept in the air.  
“Minako-chan, can’t you get the DJ to play something? We’d like to dance.” Said Chibiusa.  
“That’ll depend on his mood today… But you know what, it’s his stinking job! I’ll be sure to tell him his boss “suggested” it could attract more customers faster. Hang on a second.”  
Chibiusa turned to Hotaru: “You remember our dancing routine in Dance Dance Revolution, right? We’ll just dance in front of each other this time.”  
“Sounds like fun.” Hotaru smiled.  
They were standing at the disco floor now, and soon enough the ground lights came on in assorted colors moving around the floor. The music started playing and both girls fell into a dancing ecstasy, dancing around each other, shaking and doing v signs over their eyes to the sound of electro beats, house music, Jpop, and some international songs that were bombing around the world. Some couples decided to come over to try their hand at dancing as well. Slowly but steadily the nightclub was getting crowded.  
And slowly but steadily the music changed into softer tunes, until a ballad was playing. Some of the couples were dancing around the two girls now. Hotaru looked at Chibiusa, who looked back confused. She extended her open hand to her friend, who took a little while to figure it out but giggled and took her hand when she did. Though it wasn’t entirely appropriate to the rhythm of the music, Hotaru danced a little waltz with her friend, a dance she learned from her mother. Chibiusa, of course, was not well versed in the dance and committed several mistakes which Hotaru did her best to correct. When the music ended and Hotaru finished her last step, Chibiusa was still struggling to hold her balance, just like she did when they had started. She sighed in relief that it was all over, and they both laughed about it. Chibiusa, in honoring the spirit of what transpassed, bowed and pulled both sides of her skirt up, sliding her right leg behind her. Hotaru placed her arm in her chest, her tightened fist by her heart, and bowed as well.

***

“So, what are you two having?” Minako asked.  
“I’ll have the orange juice again, Minako-chan.” Chibiusa replied.  
“Uh, do you have tea?” Hotaru asked.

“Sorry hon. But the bartender is already doing the two of you a favor by serving you juice. He makes them out of the stock fruit he uses on his drinks, see.”  
“He isn’t doing us much of a favor if he’s charging us full price for “stock” drinks, Mina.” Chibiusa protested “The cover charge is so pricey already! Can’t you do something about it?”  
“Sorry, but I’d have to sleep with him and he’s just not my type.”  
Hotaru asked for a passion fruit beverage and Minako went away to place the order. The nightclub was a lot more crowded now and noisy, disco lights operational and music playing. After Minako returned with the beverages in their long cylindrical cups and served them, she held the tray by her waist with her arms and began to talk:  
“You know, seeing you two dancing together is cute ‘n all. But when are you going to show up here with male escorts? It’s about time…”  
“Minako-chan, we’re strong, independent women. We don’t need men.” Chibiusa jested.  
“That’s beside the point!” Minako held her index finger up and displayed a very serious countenance. “You see, the thing about men is they’re walking ATM machines. You were complaining about prices weren’t you? Treat them like a first class in savings. Just don’t forget to throw them a bone every once in a while and you’re set.”  
Hotaru was sucking on her straw quietly and attentively as she watched her friend Chibiusa get a kick out of the discourse.  
Minako cleared her throat and continued: “And besides, you can never really do away with their meat scepters!”  
At this moment Hotaru put her elbow on the table and glanced at Chibiusa with her “are you serious” look. Chibiusa winked at her with her “I’ve got this covered” look.  
“Nothing can really compare to the joys of feeling like a woman.” Minako continued.  
“You mean when they let you iron their shirts?” Chibiusa interrupted.  
Minako dazed off of her daydreaming and frowned at Chibiusa.  
“Chibiusa, don’t think I won’t slap you because you’re Usagi’s daughter… Because I will!”  
“Shouldn’t you be taking orders from other customers by now?” Chibiusa crossed her arms and looked pretty pleased with herself.  
Hotaru watched as Minako clenched her fist in mild annoyance and was about to pull Chibiusa’s cheeks, just before Minako caught her gazing at her and held back.  
“Yeah, yeah, right.” Minako forced a giggle while waving at Hotaru “Gotta earn my pay and all. Talk to you later Chibiusa!”  
Minako left, and Chibiusa smiled at Hotaru.  
“Ah, Minako… She never changes. She thinks I don’t know by now that she’s only trying to tease us with all that talk. “  
Hotaru only smiled back. Chibiusa fiddled with her straw over her empty cup a little, and then looked worriedly at Hotaru.  
“Hotaru, did you really mean what you said? That you’re leaving?”  
“Huh? Oh, yes!”  
“But why? You already have everything.”  
“Oh no! Mama and papa have everything. I just live in their world. I’ve yet to make my stand.” Hotaru was in high spirits now, happy to talk about her plans “I’ve lived in Azabu-Juban district all my life now. Enough is enough. It’s high time I go out and meet the world. Lei it touch and shape me. “  
“Let me guess: Florence, right?”  
“Well, for starters.” Hotaru was looking at her cup and holding it with both hands, excitement in her eyes “But I really mean to go everywhere if I can. Learn new ways of thinking, culture… experience everything, you know? I’ve been doing a lot of reading lately. I’ll talk to mama and papa about trying college abroad once I finish senior school. I will be studying very hard these last years!”  
“Well, I hope you get your wish.” Chibiusa smiled “And I guess that means we won’t be going out as much, huh?” Chibiusa said disheartened, her smile leaving her face as quickly as it came.  
“We can make a little time together every once in a while, but not as much, no.”  
Chibiusa didn’t let this bring her down however, and under the pretext of enjoying her last day out with her best friend invited Hotaru to the dance floor for a second round, in the middle of a huge crowd this time.  
Once they were settled again and found a new seat, laughing and breaking in sweat, they saw Minako dashing about once more, only this time wearing a large dark red dress with white ruffles under the skirt, an even bigger red bow behind her head and another bigger bow around her waist tied together to her side, a black choker with a heart in its middle, red high heels black opera gloves. She was still serving refreshments while at the same time greeting many of the locals, shaking their hands, talking near their faces, showing of her dress and laughing at any turn, especially at the VIP section upstairs, a social butterfly.  
“She says that if she ever stops being the nightclub’s mascot she’s finished” Chibiusa said, as if answering a question Hotaru never made.  
Hotaru felt a touch of pity.  
“I wonder if Minako is really happy…” She mentioned.  
“Oh, Hotaru! Don’t you know Minako-chan!? She has the durability of twenty of us! Why, she was probably built to endure everything she does! An example to us all!” Chibiusa said half in jest, half serious. Then she raised her index finger and winked “But never tell her I said it. She won’t get off my back ‘till the end of time.  
“Still, I wonder if Michiru-mama could help her…”  
“Why, I’ll bet Minako will soon be wondering the same thing…” Chibiusa waved at Minako, who was surprised at first before coming over. She placed one hand on her waist and noted:  
“My, my. I don’t exactly see how you kids are gonna help me move up the social ladder…”  
“Gee Minako, how subtle!” Chibiusa pretended to be upset “Hotaru and I we were just talking about how having your case reach Michiru’s ear could be beneficial to your free fall career.”  
Minako turned to Hotaru with a surprised look on her face again. Her eyes quickly brightened and there was a childish grin all over her face.  
“Here!”She pulled out her business card to Hotaru lightning fast, startling her. It was green with a black strip in its button and a doodle of her face doing a v sign and winking a floating heart to the side. It had her name in Kanji, her cellphone and her address.  
“Tell her I’m a triple threat: I can dance, sing and perform!” Minako said, counting her fingers at each verb.  
“Now that we’ve done you a favor why don’t you go fetch us some more drinks?” Chibiusa said cross armed.  
“Oh, sure! I’ll be right back.”she came back lightning fast, and as the nightclub called to her, left just as fast “Remember to put up that good word!” she screamed as she left.  
“Yup, an example to us all.” Chibiusa said as she sucked on her straw.

***

The nightclub was full now, walking around a hard deal. Hotaru was playing with her empty cup’s straw, and Chibiusa had hers in her mouth, looking up with her arms behind her head while moving her legs up and down under the table.  
Suddenly the lights went out. A microphone screech could be heard, and soon enough Minakos voice roared in the still dark nightclub.  
“Hello my lovely audience, this is your Goddess of Love, Minako Aino speaking! Tonight, I shall give you another advice on love affairs as I rightly should!”  
The lights slowly returned to reveal Minako center stage in the dedicated back, “her” keyboardist and DJ next to her.  
“You see, two lovely, inexperienced, untouched pure girls came to me for advice. Can I get a spotlight, please? Table thirty four…”  
Chibiusa gasped and quickly rushed around the table to grab and pull Hotaru by the arm to the back room. They had to rush past a crowd just as the spotlight focused on their abandoned seat.  
“Chibiusaaa… Hotaruuu… Don’t leave me hanging here in front of this crowd…” she placed her hand over her eyes, probing the club for them left and right. “Don’t be shy now. Come up stage…” The spotlight began to move left and right as well.  
The two had just turned around the back room’s corner, both panting by the wall.  
“Damn you, Minako!” Chibiusa muttered, clenching her fist.  
“Oh well. They asked me what they should look for in a man. Only natural! I, of course, told them they should look for their cute asses. That’s where their wallet usually is! HAHAHA!”  
The DJ produced a “ba dum tss” sound with his machine. Soon enough four tall, muscular men in tight swimwear and notable budgies showed up on stage.  
“You don’t know what you’re missing, girls!” Minako yelled.  
Hotaru shuddered at the thought of being upstage next to any of that.  
“Thank you Chibiusa-chan… That would’ve been terrible.”  
“You get used to it when you’re around her.” She noted.  
And as the music played they started dancing their choreography to “Material Girl” under the DJ’s mix and Minako’s conspicuous “engrish”.  
Hotaru and Chibiusa stared at each other in disbelief. By the end of the performance Minako teasingly stretched her leg to take out her garter and then threw it to the audience, claiming whoever catched it had the right to a free drink, and was summarily carried out of the stage by her dance partners just over their heads, waving goodbye.  
“That’s funny…” Chibiusa said, after all the noise had died “Minako doesn’t really start her performances before ten o’clock, just before the customers are too drunk.”  
“Chibiusa! It’s eleven o’clock!” Hotaru looked over her cellphone “Michiru-mama tried calling me five times already!”  
“Ah, crap! Let’s run for it!”  
And so they did: squeezing through the attendants until they made it to the exit and back into the bustling, bright city night, light rain falling now.  
“Phew, at least we didn’t have to stay for the rest of Minako’s performance. I think she was going to sing Like a Virgin next.” Chibiusa kidded whilst running to the bus stop, trying to ease the tension.  
“I doubt my mama will share your sense of humor.” Hotaru said in dread.

***

Hotaru had arrived at her parents’ fancy neighborhood. The bus would not venture further lest it could disturb the rich locals, and so Hotaru still had to run the remainder of the way. She, of course, had already called Michiru in fluster, apologizing and guaranteeing she was headed home as fast as possible.  
She had reached the path way of her Victorian residence, the first floor lights on. She quickly opened the door, and already knowing her parents would be at the living room quickly bowed with her hands together over her waist.  
“Michiru-okāsan, I’m very sorry!”  
Michiru was by the kitchen sink, making use of the time she was up waiting for Hotaru to double check the school meal her daughter would take to school with her tomorrow, binding it with an ornamental scarf.  
Haruka was by the dining table, knowing that with Michiru awake she too would have to stay awake and ready for anything she would solicit from her. She was taking this time to read her used car’s manual once more.  
Once Hotaru arrived, Michiru stopped fiddling with the bundle, lowered her head and crossed her arms without turning to the entrance door.  
“Ara, you’re sorry? You will be if you don’t wake up tomorrow ready to leave for your first day of school.”  
Now she turned around to face Hotaru.  
“I shouldn’t even be looking at you down here at this time of the night.” She noticed Hotaru was wet from the light rain “Certainly not soaking wet in the living room! Take a shower and hush to bed young lady!”  
“Hai!” Hotaru replied. However, she still hesitated “Er… Michiru-mama… May I eat something?”  
Haruka smiled over the tip of her mouth. If she were the one being so impertinent there’d be hell to pay. ‘Oh, how lucky you are Hotaru!’  
“What did I tell you about eating this late in the night?” Michiru replied “It is no good for your digestion. No, no, no. Upstairs, this instant!”  
Hotaru knew Michiru was just punishing her for arriving late, but what was she to do? She removed her sandal-shoes, put on her indoor shoes and hurried upstairs.  
“Nice leash you got there…” Haruka said quietly and passingly enough so only Hotaru could hear.  
Hotaru frowned, but she could hardly argue with the facts, could she?

***

And so with a moment’s rest Hotaru had lounged into her tub bath and finally exhaled a long sigh, her tired body from all of today’s last minute exertion sinking into the all-encompassing, soothing warm water. She was taking the time to remember all she’s done at spring break; Violin practice, painting and gardening with Michiru, the last one being their main bonding activity. Then there was reading (of course), car strolls with Haruka, stopping at any fast-food restaurant their random path choosing would take them before hitting the road again, and the stroll with Chibiusa by the countryside near the beach, the same place they’ve visited over and over again, an old tradition. In early days those travels would be filled with glee, largely in part to Chibiusa and her seemingly never ending supply of enthusiasm and energy as she pulled Hotaru along, both girls prancing all day long until Hotaru would read a book quietly at dusk, Chibiusa resting in her arm. This year Chibiusa was wearing a jeans mini skirt and carrying a purse, looking lively in a much more different, contained way and with a different kind of fun planned in her mind. She showed her pictures of last grade’s yearbook which she had brought with her all the way just to talk about the boys:, how she felt about the cute ones, stories of some of the sport jocks prowess and making fun of the not so fortunate ones in looks or social grace. She talked about boys and personal care a lot. Hotaru was a bit confused at Chibiusa’s new spunk when instead of the old physical activities and cheerful picnics and sightseeing she wanted to head into the local town and find her way into any local party. She tagged along, of course, and being the quick study she kept up with Chibiusa’s new wave, for friendship if anything else.  
Since mama and papa had suddenly decided they weren’t coming along anymore, Setsuna was the trip’s official driver and seeing to their transportational needs. And terribly at that, her driver’s license having arrived just the year before. But they both kept it to themselves so as to not hurt her feelings. When she dropped them at the city to return to the summer house all alone, Hotaru remembered now her acquiescent nod and smile just before she left the car, as if she understood that after years of being their companion, this was a new stage the two of them had to go through without her.  
‘Well! No more of that until the next semester’ she thought. ‘Or ever’ reminding herself of her new resolution.  
Then she remembered a couple of days ahead, when they were already back home from the countryside and Chibiusa taught her how to dress hip for a night out. She was going to meet her and some school friends at the shopping district and from there caprice would dictate where they would go next all the way into the night. Michiru gave her a lift, and she wore a white t-shirt with a rose in it under an english caption that read “Beauty makes them come, personality makes them stay” and a red short. When they were near Hotaru saw her friends by the main square and told Michiru:  
“It’s okay now, mama. I can drop here.”  
“Are you sure, dear? Your meeting spot is just over there.”  
Michiru had the situation already figured, of course.  
“It’s fine, I can walk… Umm, mama?”  
“Yes, Hotaru?”  
“Can… May I have twenty five hundred Yen?”  
“Only twenty five hundred? Here, have six thousand!” She quickly pulled the money from her purse.  
Hotaru’s face filled with glee and her eyes sparkled.  
“Thank you, mama! I’ll be back before nine, I promise!”  
“Oh no, dear! You’re a big girl now. You come back anytime you want.”  
Hotaru gave away a big, gullible smile and hugged her mama.  
“Thank you so much! I’ll see you later tonight then!”  
She stepped out of the car and rushed to meet her friends. She greeted them, and as she was mid-sentence into what she was saying Michiru quietly pulled her car over, lowered the passenger’s seat glass, and yelled:  
“By the way, Hotaru!”  
Hotaru and her friends looked in Michiru’s direction, worry and confusion visibly forming in the former’s face.  
“Tomorrow we’ll go shopping for some bras! A cup size!” She was screaming loud enough for Hotaru’s friends, and anyone else passing by to be able to hear it clearly “I don’t think you’ll really need them, but since you’re growing so fast we gotta watch out for that, right!? See you later my little flower!”  
She waved goodbye and sped away, the tires singing. Hotaru had a countenance of terror as she turned her head to look at her friends, who were struggling to hold back their laughing roar, even Chibiusa. They didn’t struggle very long. When she arrived home that day she tried raising an argument only to be denied it as Michiru did little more than chuckle under her wrist and say:  
“Oh, did I do that? I don’t remember, I must have been thinking of something else…”  
Michiru was like a rose to Hotaru; a rose with thorns that would sting from time to time. “I love you, Michiru- okāsan. But, excuse me, I’m so leaving.” she thought.  
She sighed again, this time a relaxed sigh, and let herself sink a little into the water. The restroom seemed darker now. Haruka had quietly entered the restroom and just as quietly shut the door behind her. Hotaru didn’t recognize the clothes she was wearing.  
“Haruka, what are you doing here?” She asked, a bit apprehensive.  
Haruka quickly slid over to the tub and put her hands on her shoulders. And putting her face disturbingly close to Hotaru’s, a vicious grin on her face, she said:  
“Don’t worry, dear. Your sacrifice will save us all.” She slowly glided her hands to her neck “Five billion lifetimes are worth just one, eh?”  
And with that, Haruka pushed her head to the bottom of the bathtub, Hotaru’s vision consisting of bubbles hastily making their way to the surface.  
Hotaru awoke gasping a deep breath, the tub water freezing. She looked around, recovering herself. Distraught, she jumped out of the bathtub, dried herself, and rushed to her bedroom.

***

Dawn was breaking out. Birds were chirping outside and the first drops of sunray were making their way inside the living room. Breakfast was being served: just tea, a loaf of bread and an apple. Hotaru went down the flight of stairs fast but without running, her footsteps announcing her coming. She saw her mother looking back at her by the kitchen sink and bowed:  
“Okāsan, good morning!”  
“Good morning, Hotaru!”She replied, pulling her hair strand just over her ear “Breakfast is on the table, come and join me!”  
She inspected Hotaru: She was in her gray school uniform with the dark gray skirt, a red bow tied just over her chest and under her collar, holding her red backpack in front of her. If Hotaru was tired from sleeping at late hours yesterday she certainly didn’t show.  
Hotaru rushed to the the kitchen table, putting her backpack on the floor and pulling a chair. She went for the cha first, gently shaking it with her tea spoon and mimicking Michiru when she held her cup up with her two hands and slowly breathed in the scent. All things Michiru had taught her to do. They both smiled at each other.  
Once breakfast was over, they headed for the family sedan and drove away into the beautiful morning, headed for school. They reviewed all the formalities that would take place at her first sophomore year in senior high, such as introducing the school to the *first years*, Hotaru reassuring her mama that she was prepared. When they reached the school gates, twenty minutes early and already crowded, Hotaru had to drop off as Michiru was meant to be at the other side at the back gates with the other parents for the new year reunions, presentations and speeches. She would not be seeing Hotaru privately again until the end of the day, so she said:  
“I’m very proud of you!”  
Hotaru turned back just as she was stepping out of the car, and said: - Mama, you always say that! Last year was the same thing!  
Michiru smiled, adding: “Oh, was it?” She tilted her head a little and winked “It’s still true!”  
And so, the new school year was opening. Hotaru went through all the process of endless and tedious formalities, introductions, seeing old faces, including Chibiusa who was nowhere near as awake and alert, and showing new students the ropes. Soon everyone was gathered at the assembly hall, where the directors and the professors gave their welcome and motivational speeches, and a long outline of what to be expected this year and of school processes. The sophomore’s welcomed everyone, and soon Hotaru delivered her piece as well, Michiru smiling and eyeing her very much. She noticed Usagi was there as well, seeming too young to possibly be Chibiusa’s mother, and when it got to be her daughter’s turn turn she waved at her in excitement, to which Michiru nudged her back into proper behavior. A little musical performance took place near the end, Hotaru one of the young violinists playing a short act of a classic waltz. Michiru had to clear an almost imperceptible tear from her eye.  
Then the farewells and thank you’s happened, and once the hall was emptied and the parents gone everyone finally made their way to class to start their first lessons. It was an eventful, rigorous day of learning the new procedures, writing down the school calendar and the lessons, meeting the new teachers and introductions. At the end of the day Hotaru stuck to her art club same as last year, and followed another series of giri observation with the acknowledging of the senpais and their ambitious plans at having the whole group stand out at the next cultural festival.  
All in all, another typical demanding and tiresome day at school. Hotaru waved Chibiusa goodbye as Usagi came to fetch her, and short after that her own mama arrived. She let go a sigh of relief after finally sitting on the passenger’s seat.  
When she arrived home, dinner was ready and served on the table; Setsuna had taken care of everything, still wearing the pink dress she used for work and an apron. She bowed by the table as mother and daughter arrived.  
“Setsuna-chan! Thank you so much for this! It will be this time only I ever ask you to hold back your work schedule and so thoughtfully prepare us meal.” She bowed.  
“Oh, Michiru-chan… You know there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you. Don’t mind me!” She bowed halfway “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve already eaten and I must prepare myself for tomorrow.” She went on to remove the apron and hang it at its proper place next to the sink.  
“Good night to you.”  
“Good night, Setsuna-chan!” Both mother and daughter answered.  
They went on to appreciate their evening meal. When they were almost finished, Hotaru asked:  
“Excuse me, mama, but why did you have Setsuna cook and not Haruka as always?”  
Michiru patiently answered: “Haruka is busy with her new lover, dear.” After seeing Hotaru’s expected shocked face, she smiled and continued “I’m referring to her car of course.”  
“But how will you pick me up and cook? Certainly you won’t ask Setsuna to do it anymore…”  
“The answer is simple, dear: I won’t pick you up. I’ve decided you can come home by way of public transportation, being all grown up… You see, you know we’ll always provide for you, but I feel hardship to be a very important teacher in helping you value the things you possess.”  
“But… but that’s not fair! It takes almost two hours to get here by bus… If the traffic is not jammed! That’s time I could spend studying! I’d much rather have you pick me up and I’d just eat a snack… or even starve! Why can’t Haruka just stick to helping me out? She’s got nothing on her hands…”  
“Well, she’s been craving to resume pursuit of her silly racing dreams for a time now. She already wants to enter that dreadful car of hers into a Sunday amateur competition and go all the way to the big leagues again. She’s been obedient and ever so helpful… You know the old adage: always let them think they have an escape route.” She smiled, the sweetness behind it tainted by her last comment. Hotaru remembered something she heard yesterday as well: ‘Just don’t forget to throw them a bone every once in a while and you’re set.’  
Then Michiru looked sideways, pensive, her smile gone from her face.  
“Which reminds me… Haruka said you were looking to “leave”?”  
Hotaru almost cursed Haruka in her mind. Was that what this all about? Did Michiru resent her for even hinting at leaving and now she was punishing her? Is that why she was being so petulant? You could never tell with her…  
“Well, she’s just a blabbermouth, isn’t she?” Hotaru let it out, to her own surprise.  
Michiru raised an eyebrow and said: “Don’t be so mad at her. You know she’s soft and easy to squeeze on a rainy day. If you didn’t want me to find out you shouldn’t have said it in passing.”  
Hotaru chuckled to herself at the thought of Haruka being “soft”. There was no doubt she was a big goof at times during times of peace. During times of war, however…  
Michiru continued: “As for the thought… It’s not unreasonable… You’d have to work hard, however, and earn it through your own merit.”  
“Of course I know that!”  
“Then I suppose that would fit very well with the plan of making you appreciate things. Alright then! I’ll still pick you up; you can cook your own dinner from now on if you want.”  
‘Knowing Michiru’, Hotaru thought, ‘she probably ceded to my idea earlier. Maybe she was even proud I came up with it! She just has to create all this drama to keep me on my toes! And what’s with the cooking? She could just leave the food ready and cold for me to heat up. She said she didn’t like doing that, but really…’ Hotaru then figured that maybe Michiru just wanted to make it look like she was doing her a big favor, coming off as an open minded mother…  
“Michiru,” Hotaru had forgotten to use the mama suffix “Haruka told me that you… “Raised a bar” on her spending…”  
Michiru was slightly vexed, and shook her wine glass a little. Hotaru did her best to hide from her face that getting even pleased her…  
“Like I said, easy to squeeze… Oh, honey, Haruka’s a big spender, and ever since you’ve been with us you’ve become our real priority.”  
Hotaru wasn’t satisfied with the cookie-cutter answer she got that was almost exactly like Haruka’s.  
“But you can all afford it! Doesn’t Haruka have her own money?”  
Michiru hated talking about money, a little more than she hated being questioned.  
“This is not about money! It never was! It was about Haruka staying with us; putting a lot of money into anything is an investment, and investments tend to have lives of their own and demand attention. I couldn’t simply let Haruka race around the country and leave me behind to raise you alone. That would be defeating the purpose!”  
“You make it sound as if I’m the reason Haruka is held back. Why don’t you admit it’s you who wants her around!?”  
Michiru never lost her composure and her fixed gaze and never showed any sign of anger at the conversation, not unless one counted her crossed arms as annoyance. She had noticed Hotaru raised her voice a bit. This was a recurring habit. How amusing. She wasn’t sure if she should put her down, or let her grow confidence and continue her sass for her own enjoyment. Whichever pleased her most, she thought. ‘So different from Haruka you’re turning out to be, Hotaru! The fragile, compliant little child now screams for space. Isn’t that a mark of strength?’ Michiru remembered the few times she really saw Hotaru’s innermost strength: what a frightening, beautiful sight it was! And then she remembered the altercations she had with her own family in her last days with them. Michiru felt a private pride inside of her, one that she would never admit to. ‘Can you really match wits with me, Hotaru? I wonder…’  
“Of course I wanted Haruka around, and if it weren’t for you I’d follow her on her adventures. But you needed to settle somewhere, go to school and have a decent, productive life. I couldn’t let Haruka continue her old reckless life style of speeding the highways with sports cars. I did everything in my power to make sure you had two parents instead of just one.” She calmed down a little, removing a speck of hair from her eye and finishing her wine “And yes, I needed Haruka as a support as well, and not just for you. You have a funny way of showing gratitude young lady, being upset at us for changing our lives for you!”  
For a moment, Michiru held back her tongue, remembering the past and what a hypocrite she was being.  
Hotaru didn’t have a quick reply this time. Michiru collected, stood up and decided to make sure she wouldn’t have one.  
“Didn’t you say you needed the extra time to study? Isn’t it high time you looked into that?”  
Hotaru thought briefly, then lowered her head and said:  
“I’m sorry, mama…”  
“It’s alright, dear.”  
“Mama…”  
Michiru was slightly surprised; figuring the conversation finished she was already turning around as Hotaru called out to her.  
“Yes, Hotaru…?”  
“I… Minako-chan handed me her card… I told her I would talk to you about… helping her…”  
‘How clumsy, Hotaru. Maybe you don’t have it in you after all. Oh well.’ She thought.  
“Oh? So now Minako wants to try to pull my heartstrings by using my daughter to ask me for recommendations?”  
“Oh no! I wanted to help her; I was the one who made the offer!”  
“Oh. How kind of you. Well let me tell you the same thing I told her the last time she came to me: my contacts are mainly orchestra musicians. The closest I know that would have anything to do with her ambitions are opera singers; certainly none of the idol scenery.”  
“Maybe it doesn’t have to do with music; she told me she was a triple threat.”  
“Oh really? Well, I knew a few people from a rather successful troupe once.” She paused “I mean, they could give her a part, but she’d have to play the fool I’m afraid.” Michiru smiled once more…

***

The days carried on peacefully, at least on the domestic side. In matters of school Hotaru kept her promise of studying any chance she got, forfeiting any time she’d normally spend with her friend or her parents during resting days. She struggled at first, even with her well-developed intellect, new subjects being studied just as soon as the previous ones were introduced and glanced over the previous class. It was exhausting! She missed Ami, her once good willing mentor in these matters, now gone to Germany and almost finishing her Bachelor’s degree. She remembered how in some things she had a lot in common with her, with pleasant conversation flowing so naturally. ‘Oh, Ami-chan’, Hotaru thought, ‘Can I follow in your footsteps? Maybe someday we’ll run into each other in Europe’. The thought pleased her.  
She did still go to her art club, and that was the only time she could make to rest and to rendezvous with Chibiusa. That day they were in class practicing their skill before giving it their best in the painting they would make just for the festival. Chibiusa was painting a curving rainbow highway protruding out of the bottom left corner of the board headed for the upper left corner, practicing the conveyance of distance and spatial awareness by drawing it large and full of colors near its beginning and eventually shrinking it as it neared its destination. This was done on an all-black background, and to not make it feel so empty she drew red autumn leaves to the sides and through the rainbow and strong sunray coming in through the upper right of the painting. Hotaru was painting a kneeled, hooded woman staring at a mirror over a soft blue and pink tone background. She had her back to the viewer in it, just a pace away from the mirror and holding a candle. Her hood, as well as her robe’s color was a very light blue, and her face in the mirror was hidden by the white light Hotaru drew over it, emanated by the candle’s fire. The symmetry was flawless, the hooded woman just under the center and equally spreading her shoulders to the side, with her equally symmetrical reflection and unrevealed face over her hooded nape, with the candle right in the center of it all.  
“Hotaru that is flawless!” Chibiusa said as she looked over to the side “You are so much better than me!”  
“Thank you! But I had a very rigorous mama who insisted I learned the Arts if anything else… That’s what she calls the fields of music, artistry, literature, anything dealing with self-expression really. She told me they are a window to the soul; a way for it to flow to and fro. And that her knowledge of them would be the greatest gifts she ever passed on to me.”  
Hotaru put her brush down for a second and held her hands together over her waist, blushing. She remembered how Michiru once told her she was the window of her life, the window to a higher, better world. ‘Oh Michiru, you sycophant.’ She thought. ‘Haruka was wrong for ever thinking she charmed you!’  
“Right. Better than my own mama who does nothing but shop, eat, read magazines and fawn over Mamo-chan.”  
Hotaru giggled and said tenderly: “Don’t underestimate your mother like that.”  
But she did feel lucky for having someone like Michiru raise her; Hotaru knew she was not a dime a dozen, not Michiru Kaiou. Even if sometimes Hotaru wanted to pull Michiru’s hair out of her scalp for knowing it as well.  
Then she decided to drop the hammer on her friend.  
“Anyhow, I’m glad I’m almost done with this piece. I’m thinking of going to cram school to further improve my studying.”  
“What!? Hotaru, no! You won’t be expressing your soul or whatever if you overdo yourself!”  
“My soul wants to be free and see the world. Don’t you remember how hard Ami-chan had to study to go to Germany? I want to follow in her footsteps.”  
“Hotaru, Ami-chan was a machine! You shouldn’t try to be like her. What if you miss the best days of your life?”  
“I’m resolute, and I feel the best days of my life have to be claimed.”  
Class carried on for a bit, with a disheartened, cross armed Chibiusa barely retouching her own painting. What was the point now? Hotaru finished hers, let the ink dry a little and removed the canvas from the easel.  
“There! I know this was supposed to be training, but I think its good enough for the festival. I’ll make it my last contribution to this club. What do you think, Chibiusa-chan?”  
“Whatever you say, Hotaru.”  
“I’m sorry Chibiusa. I wouldn’t be doing this if I didn’t feel it was important for me. I’m still your friend.”  
“I understand, Hotaru, Really.”  
“…Let’s go do something together today. It would mean a lot to me.”  
“Don’t you have to study?”  
“I’ll make up for it. Please?”  
Chibiusa thought about it, not really up for it. Then something she saw the other day crossed her mind, and her eyes started to shine.  
“Oh! I know! Hotaru there is something three blocks down from here you should see. I think you’ll like it! Let’s just put these paintings in their place and leave!”  
Hotaru was hoping for a disheartened compliance at best, so she was surprised when Chibiusa cheered up out of nowhere like that. They both called their respective mothers telling them they would be late and then Chibiusa dragged Hotaru down the street after they were done in the club. She was too startled to ask where they were going, although she was amused, then happy to relive the old days of being pulled around.  
They’ve arrived at a little establishment on a remote street. Hotaru noticed that instead of the door with the typical announcing bell at the top the entrance was covered with beads hanging from it. Inside the place seemed rundown, the walls an unpainted grey, and rather deserted. There was a large counter to the right side and Hotaru could make out the contents behind it.  
“Another bar, Chibiusa? Re…”  
Just then Hotaru could make out a very familiar sound coming from somewhere the other side of the room. A sound she associated with her youth and passion. Ping-Pong.  
“Is that…!?”  
“Yes, Hotaru! Table Tennis! It’s still your favorite, right?”  
“I… Of course!”  
“There’s a table here. We don’t have to pay or anything, come on!”  
They crossed the room to the left going down a flight of two stairs into another room with more chairs and tables and the main attraction further in the back, already taken by two teens, a girl and a boy about Hotaru and Chibiusa’s age and another, older boy who was smoking and laying on the wall behind them. Hotaru noticed that neither of the two teens playing it were anything to talk about. They patiently waited for their turn. And waited. And waited. Until Chibiusa finally lost her cool and let it out:  
“Do you guys own the table now? We want to play too!”  
They both held their game back and looked at them. The blonde girl, her hair obviously dyed, looked at them in contempt as if they were so much filth. She wore a less than perfectly tidy black school uniform that was creased in some places, and her hair could use another brush. The boy was tall, thin, and bald and had a twisted face, possibly from some kind of childhood injury. He was trying to look too cool by wearing a leather vest over a dirty, grimy white shirt and jeans.  
“Oh, look at the fresh fruit that blew in. Are you two legal yet?”  
Hotaru didn’t understand what he was referring to, but Chibiusa did. She was furious, and bent herself forward.  
“Why don’t you stop playing and go to the red light district!? The only reason a woman would ever be with you is for money anyway!”  
The girl on the other side of the table laughed and said:  
“She got that right, Saburo!”  
The boy was, predictably, unamused. He picked the tiny ball and thrusted it in Chibiusa’s direction with his racket. Chibiusa gasped and covered her face for protection. When she ventured a peek she saw Hotaru was holding the ball in her hand, having intercepted it from touching her friend. She then teasingly threw the ball up and down with her hand.  
“I’ve got your ball now. Are you gonna let us play?”  
“You rascal, give it back to me!”  
“I don’t like your tone of voice. I think you should show people who are better than you at this game the proper deference.”  
“Better than me!?” The boy, Saburo, was easily provoked “Kotone! Give her your racket!”  
“No way! You give her yours!”  
Saburo threw his racket at her, who did not see it coming and received it squarely in her forehead. She angrily threw hers back at him but Saburo was ready for it and skillfully grabbed it.  
“Now get lost!”  
“*sob* You’re gonna get what’s coming to you, Saburo. You just wait and see!”  
She indignantly stepped aside scratching her new forehead lump and just holding back her tears. Hotaru stepped in and picked up the racket left in the table. Chibiusa was spectating it in the back cross armed and with a very self-satisfied grin on her face.  
“You’re in for it now, little girl. Unless you suck so bad you can’t even keep the ball in the table, you’re going to get a new lump just like Kotone over there!”  
“Oh, please be good to me…”  
“Ha ha, too late! If you can’t stand the heat, stay…”  
A ball quickly bounced in Hotaru’s court, then through Saburo’s court and past him. It kept on bouncing in the ground a bit as Saburo stayed there speechless. When he finally opened his mouth, he said:  
“You started while I was talking. That’s cheating! Now it’s my turn!”  
“If you can’t stand the heat…”  
He went to fetch the ball angrily. When he came back and got to service it he cheated by throwing it straight to Hotaru’s field and possibly into her face. She reacted byfuriously hitting it back, making it hit his court and ricochet into the ceiling then back into the ground behind him, then the wall behind him and finally gently into his nape. He was dumbstruck.  
The fake blond girl let out a high-pitched, irritating laugh and said:  
“Oh Saburo, you did get your share. C’mon now, let me show you how it’s done” she unceremoniously pushed him aside, almost dropping him to the ground. She picked up the ball from the ground and served.  
Only to have the same experience Saburo did: she tried to play but then she realised she didn’t really have the courage to face a ball coming at her faster than the human eye could see and would always dodge out of the way, shrieking. She tried a good three times, and by the fourth time, with Saburo laughing under his breath, she decided to try her special trick. “I’ll get at least one” she thought. She threw the ball to Hotaru, claiming it was her turn to serve now and gleefully waited her opportunity. With Hotaru serving the ball it became easier for Kotono to actually see it. With a special flick of her wrist she made the ball just touch the tip of the net assembly. Hotaru saw this, alerted, and ran to the side of the table and stretched her arm with all her strength and with all the speed she could muster. Shaking the net, she managed to just get the ball to hit her foe’s court and ricochet into her tummy with reasonable strength. Kotono let out another shriek as she hopped from the ground, and couldn’t believe she had lost again; she pulled the sides of her long hair with both hands and grunted in frustration.  
“Now it’s my turn again Kotono, you loser!”  
“No.” The boy in the back finally spoke, putting out his cigar on Saburo’s vest, to his startlement. “You suck, let me do this.”  
This boy was slim, his hair short and well-trimmed and taller than everybody else. He wore his school uniform, albeit beaten up, with his sleeves pulled up and his coat hanging over his shoulders.  
“Here, hold this for me Kotono.” He threw his coat at her shoulders, almost right at her face.  
“Sure, Ren, anything.” She fawned, Saboru mimicking her in mockery just behind her.  
He pulled his sleeves once more, picked up the racket and bounced the ball through the table to Hotaru.  
“Here! You serve.”  
Hotaru thought for a moment as she spun her racket: she hadn’t seen him play. Was he really as tough as he was trying to look, or just showing of? She opted not to take chances and play the fast ball again. He took his time to stretch his arm as the ball rebounded on his court, and in one quick motion returned it with great speed. Hotaru was startled for a second, and quickly and barely returned it to the her foe’s court. ‘This won’t do’ she thought, ‘I practically handed the ball to him now. I have to get on the same pace as he and return fire with fire’. Sure enough, Ren made easy work of the ball slowly coming his way, but Hotaru was ready for round two and returned it to him at the same speed. The pace was set. Both were swinging the ball back and forth too fast for any spectators, both acting almost on instinct. However, Hotaru felt her opponent was just changing the direction of the ball from one side to the other unambitiously, maybe hoping she’d get tired or missed a beat. ‘This is a mistake; I’ll make you pay for it’. On Hotaru’s fifth swing she quickly turned her racket around to add a spin effect just as the ball was coming. Having guessed by now where her opponent would return the ball, she hit it squarely. As Ren thought he had everything under control, he went for another swing. But this time the ball did a sharper turn than usual at the last minute and only touched the rims of his racket, falling down on the floor.  
His two companions were dumb struck. Ren himself only stood there, his arm still stretched and the racket still on his hand, looking intently at Hotaru. Who was in turn full of pride of herself, and amazed her opponent actually made her break a sweat. Chibiusa was savoring the rare occasion of seeing her friend’s face expressing so much power and ambitious joy as a line of her mouth revealed her self-satisfaction.  
“Very well, you win.”  
‘What?’ Hotaru thought. Her opponent simply dropped the racket on the table and turned around.  
“We’re not going to continue?” Hotaru asked, her spirited face falling back to its old meek countenance.  
“You’re too good for me.”  
“Ren-San, you almost had her! She won by a fluke! If you continue you’ll win next time for sure!” Saburu protested, while Kotano held on to his arm.  
Just then a fat, short mustached man appeared over the entrance to this side of the bar and yelled.  
“Ren! I already told you to take it easy on the Ping-Pong! I can’t afford to have my walls covered with ball marks!”  
“Shut up, old man.”  
“And who are those two girls now, your new dates? They haven’t bought anything from me yet! I can’t just let you invite anyone here without paying!”  
Ren pulled a clip of notes from his pocket and threw it at the fat man as he left, his two friends following him outside, and their grouchy stare over their shoulders. “This should cover whatever these girls want. Give them one of your lollipops or something. And keep the change if that’s what it takes to shut you up.”  
“Oh yeah? Well, I spit at your money.” And so he did, just before putting it in his front shirt pocket.  
He looked at the two girls now alone in his empty bar, scoffed and walked away.  
“Chibiusa… I don’t think I want to play anymore…”  
“Yeah, me neither. Let’s go.”  
They were back outside, headed back to school - which was now closed - and from there to the bus stop. The sky was already taking its orange hue from the late afternoon hour. Hotaru and Chibiusa walked on in silence until Chibiusa’s angst finally shined through as she turned to her friend, her fists held in front of her face, as she spoke:  
“Hotaru, I’m sorry! I didn’t know those lowlifes would be there today! I knew there was a public school with sketchy reputation next neighborhood, but I didn’t think they would come all the way to…”  
\- Chibiusa-chan, it’s quite alright!” Hotaru interrupted “I had so much fun teaching those fools a lesson! It was the best time I’ve had in a few years.”  
Chibiusa smiled in relief  
“Really? Well, I knew you were going to win. I remember when you were dead serious about your ping-pong; you even used to sleep with your racket next to you in your pillow.”  
“Yeah! I remember it too! Why couldn’t I just get a teddy bear like everyone else?” She smiled.  
“ I wouldn’t want to trade that memory for anything. You managed to look weird, funny, and cute all in one!”  
“…Really?” Hotaru blushed, her eyes tender, not sure what to say “Thanks!”  
Hotaru discreetly placedher arm under Chibiusa’s, which prompted the latter to jolt for it in full force, grabbing it tightly and almost tripping Hotaru over, as both friends walked down the street under the setting sun.

***

And so Hotaru enrolled in a cram school to further aid her in her pursuit, and much to her clubs colleagues’ chagrin had to leave it to dedicate more time into studying, begging their understanding. From there on she would leave cram school late in the evening, not a moment’s rest till then and full of homework from it and the regular school to work into.  
She found herself on her bed one night, Michiru had just covered her with a blanket and had her back to her - lightning one of her many lamps - and noticed her school shirt, skirt and shoes had been removed.  
“Mama…?”  
“Oh, did I awake you?”  
“How… did I get here?”  
“You fell asleep. In Haruka’s car, she picked you up today. She was most upset when you dazed off while she was talking about her little toy’s specs.” Michiru was lightning an oil lamp that looked like a test-tube with one of the matches of the matchbox already left by its side and adjusting the tap to regulate the strength of the flame. ‘How charming’ she thought.  
Hotaru remembered: Haruka had pulled over her Ferrari by the entrance and she rushed inside. Barely did she and Haruka started yapping about it, pride stamped in her face, telling the prowess she and her friend the mechanic had pulled into installing an imported engine all by themselves, which was nowhere near as impressive as the prowess of finding a Ferrari Enzo engine for sale in the first place, and then placing it on a different Ferrari model all together...  
Hotaru had only nodded for a while, and Haruka’s words soon became hypnotic and tranquilizing…  
“She was proud to say all the other kids in the streets looked your direction as you entered the car though.” Michiru continued.  
“I don’t want that kind of attention…” Hotaru said indifferently, putting her hand on her mouth as she yawned.  
“Oh? Then you better get used to it… Unless you’d rather take the bus.”  
“You’re so cruel… don’t you ever get tired of pulling my strings?” Hotaru said indifferently again, sounding as if she just mocked Michiru.  
Michiru let her head drop a little, crossing her arms; a smile on her face and almost chuckling.  
“Ara, so you’ve noticed them!? That’s the first step to freedom… I’m in trouble now!”  
Hotaru chuckled softly, a wearied smile on her face. Michiru had memories of that same innocent chuckling from when Hotaru was much younger, back when she used to tickle her little belly. ‘I wish you had been a baby longer’, she thought to herself. She picked up the lantern and held it gently as she approached Hotaru’s bed. She pulled the chair from her study desk and sat next to her, the lantern on her lap.  
“So! I had to bring you up from the car through the flight of stairs. I have to say, carrying you is not as easy as it used to be.”  
“Are you saying I gained weight?”Hotaru jested  
“I’m saying there’s more of you to love.” Michiru jested back.  
“Subtle…”  
Michiru tilted and rested her face on her hand. She rubbed her cheek gently as she found herself fondly remembering her early days with Hotaru. Wishing they had lasted longer…  
“Mama…”  
“Yes, dear.” Michiru was happy to hear her voice.  
“What was Vienna like?”  
Michiru had already told her long ago, but she wanted to hear it again and Michiru didn’t mind talking about it anyway.  
“Oh yes! Let me tell you, what a wonderful place it is! It’s the place where many of my masters… I’m sorry, many great musicians found prominence, as you well know. Everything reeks of culture, without being pedant or pretentious like you can see almost everywhere else. Oh, I remember the night sky over there… And the hills! And the mountains! The Danube! The Gloriette Garden!” Michiru took a deep sigh “I wished Haruka was there with me back then.”  
“Haruka, Setsuna, me … We were all proud of you when you went there to play.”  
“Yes. It was a great honor for me: to be allowed a performance in the Life Ball, even if it was as part of an avant-garde band that wasn’t strictly classical. At least it was fun; perhaps even the highlight of my life, dare I say? It didn’t so much feel like a dream as like a fairytale.  
“Didn’t you want to take a tour of the rest of Europe though, since you were there?”  
“You mean like a tour of Florence?” She smiled “Sorry dear. I was already feeling so realised I could’ve just died then and there and be ok with it. Besides, I had to come back running for all of you. That was the longest I’ve ever been away from home.”  
“I wish I could get that feeling as well: so happy I could just leave the world.”  
Michiru nodded, but inside she regretted raising the topic of death.  
“Someday I will visit your Vienna too…”  
Michiru pulled and straightened Hotaru’s blanket once more, pinching her cheeks.  
“I pray on it.”  
“If I wasn’t so tired I’d hug you.”  
“Is that so? Well, let me help you with that.”  
Michiru put down the lantern next to the bed, approached her daughter and put her arms under her back and squeezed her so hard it almost made Hotaru ache.  
“ Ouch!”  
“That’s what you get for being so adorable.”  
Michiru picked the lantern again and continued.  
“You know, all your hard work will pay off someday. Don’t let it discourage you! It’s already molding you into a fine, beautiful woman. Women are never as beautiful than when they’re strong, resolute and self-sufficient. Trust me, I would know” she winked, and continued “You can go far; you are a warrior, just like me!”  
‘Warrior’, Hotaru thought, ‘warrior…’ She had glimpses of memories she could not quite make out, deeply related to her. This intrigued her; now she could only stare at the lantern’s flame as it danced softly in her eyes.  
“Mama…”  
“Yes, Hotaru?”  
“How old am I?”  
Michiru was puzzled: “Sixteen dear. Are you that tired?”  
“No, I just thought for a moment I was older than that… I … remembered days when I lived with my real papa, and you weren’t around…”  
She was about to dismiss the thought and was trying to smile:  
“I know, how is that even…”  
She stopped when she noticed Michiru’s smile had given way to a somber face. When Michiru felt Hotaru’s gaze on her, she tried producing a feeble smile.  
“Of course, you are wise beyond your years…!”  
“Mama… how is papa?”  
“Your father has a terrible recurrent memory lapse. You know that, we’ve visited him before. He remembers you somewhat and is always glad to see you. Would you like to visit him soon?”  
That last question felt almost intrusive, and Michiru didn’t seem to be spacing her phrases as well as she used to. Hotaru was a bit startled; she had never seen Michiru act like that. Something about her had changed; a different person.  
“Mama, when did Tomoe-papa get sick and you and Haruka adopt me? I seem to remember much of the time papa was healthy, and yet…”  
Michiru shook a little, clenched her fist over her lap and never took her eyes off Hotaru’s face, which only served to creep her further.  
“…You’re just tired, dear…”  
Hotaru had something else stinging the back of her mind now  
“And… what happened to my real mama…?” She asked.  
“Oh Hotaru, why do you have to bring this up now!?”  
She got up, almost throwing the chair back. She put it back in its place and was doing the same with the lantern.  
“We’ve tried to forget the past in this house; it only brings pain!” Michiru said, failing to realize that only intrigued Hotaru more. She couldn’t understand what had triggered her so and was almost scared.  
As Michiru was heading for the door, Hotaru called to her:  
“Mama… mama!”  
“What…!?”Michiru had turned around abruptly by the door “I’m sorry dear… what?”  
Hotaru didn’t say anything for a second, shocked herself. She thought a little and asked:  
“You wouldn’t keep anything hidden from me… would you?”  
Michiru paused, and stared sadly into the nothing.  
“No.”  
And she left. Hotaru wasn’t convinced; that night she didn’t sleep very well.

***

The next day it was Haruka who drove Hotaru to school, and she wasn’t her usual talkative self. If Hotaru hadn’t been so tired from her poor sleep she might’ve thought it strange and connected the dots.  
In class she was constantly dozing off by her desk, at one point face planting it and echoing a thud across the room. She was thoroughly embarrassed, and after being “invited” out of the room she had to apologize and guarantee it wouldn’t happen again. And with her face aching and screaming her back to the waking world, it certainly didn’t.  
After what seemed forever, class was finally over. Hotaru leaned her back over the wall by the school gate, her face better now and therefore struggling to stay awake once more, even with the sounds of many students chattering and rushing themselves on their way.  
“Hotaru-chan?”  
A familiar voice called to her, Hotaru raised her head to see it was none other than Chibiusa bending to look at her lowered face.  
“Uh…”  
“Hotaru what happened to your face? You have a lump and dark circles under your eyes. It looks as if you hit a wall or something.”  
“Close enough…”  
“You know, I really miss you at the art club. Everyone does!”  
“I told you Chibiusa I have new priorities now, in fact…” she looked at the time in her cellphone “I have to get going.”  
Hotaru put her backpack in her back and started to walk.  
“Hotaru, look at you. You’re tired. You can barely walk without limping. Why don’t you skip cram school just for today and go rest?”  
Hotaru sighed. Chibiusa wasn’t being unreasonable, and as much as she hated skipping class, or any hard work for that matter, she couldn’t’ see how she’d make any progress today. All because of the day before…  
“…Chibiusa?’  
“Yes?”  
‘Did your mama ever act… weird around you?”  
“Usagi, weird? Only when she breathes, why?”  
“ Michiru-mama was… upset yesterday when I asked her about my real parents.”  
Chibiusa was a bit apprehensive herself now: she remembered what Setsuna advised her a long time ago… If Hotaru weren’t so tired and with her back to her friend she might’ve noticed.  
“Well…” Chibiusa was thinking of something to say “Maybe she had something else in her mind.”  
Hotaru turned around to her friend, whose heartbeat ratio increased a little.  
“Were my real parents still around when we first met, Chibiusa? I don’t remember anymore… It’s so frustrating…”  
Chibiusa didn’t know what to say. Was she supposed to lie?  
“No… I don’t think they were…” she opted to lie “You’re just tired, Hotaru…”  
“My mama said exactly the same thing yesterday…” Hotaru was starting to frown with her tired face.  
Chibiusa’s heart raced and she started to sweat.  
“Chibiusa… do you remember what the first time we met was like?”  
Chibiusa pulled her collar to relieve herself of some of the heat.  
“O-of course I do! You picked my stray hat for me. The wind was blowing it away!”  
Hotaru remembered it so clearly, and so fast it was as if lightning had fallen right in front of her. She was very alarmed and awake now.  
“Oh! I remember! You were so short back then! And I was so lonely…”  
‘Lonely?’ She thought. ‘Why? Didn’t I already have Haruka-papa and Michiru-mama with me?’  
“And sick. I was very sick!” Hotaru put her hands on the side of her head, pressing it in despair “And I don’t remember how, or when I ever got healthy again!”  
She looked at Chibiusa and let go of her head, staring widely at her friend as if she were a buoy in the middle of the ocean.  
“Chibiusa, what happened? You were there, weren’t you!? Tell me!”  
Chibiusa was starting to tear up, immobile where she stood.  
“I-I’m sorry Hotaru, but Setsuna-chan said…”  
“Setsuna!?” She approached her friend and grabbed her shoulders, slightly shaking her “Chibiusa, what are you talking about!? I need to know what happened!”  
Chibiusa started crying.  
“Sailor Moon… she…”  
“Sailor… Moon…!?”  
“ I-I’m sorry, Hotaru! Ask your mother! Ask Michiru!”  
She freed herself from her friends’ grip and ran away. Hotaru just stood there, her arms still extended, staring in disbelief as her friend ran off.

***

Hotaru arrived in her neighborhood by bus, calling for a lift from Michiru or anyone else something she’d rather not do. She eagerly anticipated a heart to heart discussion as she walked the path to her house; more and more as she got closer. When she finally arrived she unlocked the door and burst it open, Michiru just across the room and making dinner today, - even though she said she wouldn’t anymore - slicing onions with a kitchen knife. She didn’t turn to face Hotaru, though she most certainly noticed her rude entrance.  
“ You’re home early today, don’t you have cram school?”  
Hotaru didn’t move from the entrance.  
‘Yesterday you told me the past only brings pain. But you also told me that pain is a great teacher that makes us stronger.”  
“It also drives you mad.”  
Michiru dryly looked in Hotaru’s direction. Hotaru decided not to diddle-daddle anymore and spewed her piece:  
“Michiru, what are you keeping from me?”  
“Ara, what are you even talking about this time, Hotaru?”  
“Don’t play me! Yesterday you wouldn’t give me a straight answer. I talked to Chibiusa and she started acting weird like you; she told me to ask you about it! I’m your daughter and I have the right to know!”  
Michiru breathed in and sighed.  
“There is nothing to know, Hotaru.” she lied, having thought things out since yesterday “Your mother died in a terrible lab explosion in an experiment your father was conducting. He got caught up in the explosion too, he received a terrible blow to the head and he is what he is today. You were badly injured yourself, and stayed in a coma for the majority of your early life. Then when you woke up you were also afflicted with amnesia, but unlike your father you slowly recovered. You went into coma too young to have much of a life to remember anyway.” She paused, and continued “I don’t know what went on in Chibiusa’s head. You probably were a rude little prick as you are being right now and upset her enough into replying something that didn’t make sense, out of pressure.  
Hotaru remembered the lab ordeal a little, and the experiment behind a glass window. And something about a black star…  
“How old was I when the lab explosion happened?”  
“I already told you: three.”  
“And how did you and Haruka know Tomoe-papa?”  
“He and his wife were part of the high society, and your mother was an appreciator of the arts. We took a liking to each other.”  
“You’re lying! I know you and I know when you lie! I… I keep remembering a time I lived with Tomoe-papa…” it was true, she remembered the old, dark mansion they lived in. She also remembered being mainly kept inside and watched over by a shrew woman “… And a stepmother…?”  
Michiru looked at her intently, startled.  
“I-impossible!” Michiru was trying to concoct the old story again “You were in the hospital. And when you woke up you came straight with us! You can’t possibly remember such nonsense!”  
‘Another lie…”  
“Hotaru look over the desk there!” Michiru pointed towards it “There’s a picture of you when you were seven years old and by the cherry tree blossom. Setsuna and I are in it! I can tell you: when you came to live with us, we didn’t exchange you back and forth with Tomoe-san. Especially not in the state he was already in. How do you explain it!?” Michiru was as much trying to hold her lie together as she was trying to see if Hotaru could sort it out “Or do you think I’m lying about that too!?”  
“But…”Hotaru couldn’t explain it.  
“The lab explosion happened twelve years ago. And that’s how long your father has been amnesic. Do I really need to pull up the news, and your medical record!? It greatly troubles me to see you actually believe what you’re saying! You are over exerting yourself too much. I think we should put you on medication…”  
Hotaru was offended, and shouted in a high pitch:  
“Don’t you dare insinuate I’m going crazy!”  
“Then stop this, Hotaru! For heaven’s sake, stop it!” Michiru held back her outburst, taking a deep sigh “Dinner will be ready soon! Go wash yourself and come back to eat.”  
“I’m not hungry…”  
“Hotaru, take off your shoes before you come in! Hotaru!”  
Hotaru was going straight for the staircase, and then she stopped. Not turning around to face Michiru, she asked:  
“Michiru… Who is Sailor Moon?”  
Michiru was shocked again, but did her best to hide it.  
“Sailor Moon… She was some eccentric girl who fought criminals… In a sailor suit, no less. She disappeared a long time ago, and I’m not surprised that she did.”  
Hotaru looked over the desk: indeed the cherry tree picture was there; Hotaru, Setsuna and Michiru in it, so happy. How could she explain it? Would they be so low as to doctor the photo? Hotaru didn’t doubt anything anymore. She resumed her walk upstairs.  
Michiru sighed once more. Lying was a thing she was very much used to, but this time it left a terrible taste on her mouth. She grabbed a wine bottle and poured its content over the wine glass. It soothed her somewhat; she had forgotten how it made her feel light. She hiccupped and put her hand on her mouth in shame. She found she wouldn’t mind having a bit more. For a while now she drank wine only for its health benefit, but the way she drank it now had nothing healthy about it.

***

The next day started seemingly uneventful, until Hotaru went downstairs and saw Haruka was standing by the front door, waiting for her in Michiru’s place. Hotaru didn’t say anything, already guessing what had happened.  
“And a good day to you too!” Haruka said snarkily.  
Hotaru glowered at Haruka. Little boiled Haruka’s blood more than such an attitude, and she glowered right back at her. Hotaru didn’t flinch, however.  
“What about you, huh? What are you hiding from me? What do you know?”  
“I know you treated Michiru like shit yesterday! I came home to find her drunk like a skunk, after we agreed to quit drinking. Because of you, no less! When I think she gave me a hard time because of an ungrateful shit like you, I could just… I’m taking you to school today! Whether you want to or not!”  
It was true: when Haruka arrived home yesterday it didn’t take long for Michiru to unleash a diatribe on her. First over how much she spent on the car, then on arriving home late, at one point about the times Michiru caught Haruka cheating on her, and then… she couldn’t quite make out; the argument became muddled as they moved from one side of the house to the other. Haruka tried to gain control of the situation by speaking with a low, but firm voice, Michiru would sometimes calm down, and then raise her voice again at intervals. They finally walked upstairs to their room and talked quietly in their room over something… Come to think of it, Hotaru never saw Michiru lose so much control. Now she was sure Michiru was a liar.  
“I should just take you as far as the gas tank would allow and drop you on the highway, penniless” Haruka continued “And as if you were a dog hope you’d never find your way back again.  
“Do your worst…”  
“Do your… Girl, you step into the car right this instant!” She burst the front door open, making it crash against the wall “Or I’m going to beat the crap out of you, and once when you’re unconscious I’ll carry you to the car and “drop” you to your destination alright!  
Hotaru simply did as she was told, though not because she was afraid. Haruka didn’t let her eyes off her as she walked past her without acknowledging her. When they were both in the car Haruka quickly shifted first and made the tires screech. The g force pulled Hotaru back in the chair, her stomach twisting. That happened many times as Haruka never lessened the pace. She wasn’t afraid though, even though had Haruka made one mistake they could well have ended up dead. When Haruka arrived at Hotaru’s school front gate in eleven minutes, she shouted:  
“Get out! Now!”  
Hotaru got out; as soon as she moved her other foot outside Haruka dashed the car again, the tires screeching once more. She didn’t even wait for Hotaru to close the passenger’s door; it eventually closed itself as the Ferrari took a sharp turn. Everyone at the front gate was silent, staring at Hotaru and the speeding Ferrari, and then just at Hotaru. She didn’t care.

***

“Haruka! I told you to take her to school! Not almost kill her with that wretched machine!” Michiru had very much heard when Haruka sped away in her Ferrari, getting out of bed just in time to see it turn sharply and generate smoke out of its tires. And now she was just by the front door as Haruka opened it. She wore her long light blue coat over a white shirt, and had her hair tied back with a red bow.  
“I had everything under control…”  
“Ara! You’re so immature! I want you to get rid of that car now!”  
Haruka had just finished putting her car together and was not willing to do that. She crossed her arms and didn’t answer.  
“Don’t make me hire a steamroller!”  
“Michiru… I’ve waited years to get me a car! Now that I do after agreeing to your terms, playing by your rules, you want me to part with it. It’s not fair!”  
“Don’t argue with me on this! This is all your doing!” She started hitting Haruka’s chest with the side of her fists, shaken. Haruka thought that if she were anyone else…  
“I don’t want you in this house while that thing is around! Get out! Now! And take it with you!”  
Haruka stood motionless for a while. The night before notwithstanding, it was unusual of Michiru to show open anger like this, and her lack of experience in it made it difficult for Haruka to feel like reciprocating her.  
“Fine.”  
It was all she said as she made her way to the car and went away with it to who knows where. Setsuna was just in the back by the open door to her room, wearing her all pink buttoned dress. She had heard the previous day’s predicament as well.  
“Michiru, I think I’ll take the day off from work today and be with you if you don’t mind…”  
“And why do you think you can help!? You overestimate yourself!” Michiru quickly put her hand on her mouth as she looked at Setsuna, her eyes almost tearing up “Setsuna! I’m sorry!”  
Setsuna only nodded, feeling insulted over petty remarks a thing she hasn’t done in centuries. Besides, she knew despair’s face too well to not recognize when it spoke in other’s behalf.  
“I’ll make breakfast. Why don’t you just sit down for a moment?” She went for the sink, and started cleaning all those empty wine bottles before she would put them together for recycling.  
“Yes… I think I’ll do that…”  
Surrendering to Setsuna’s suggestions always did Michiru good, she found. She sat on the living room’s couch, just by the kitchen, and lied back and threw her weight onto the sofa’s arm, drained.  
Setsuna started preparing a basic tofu miso soup on the pan, pickled some Ume plums and dipped a strip of nori on soy sauce and rolled some rice with it. Once everything was ready, she placed everything on a tray and took it over to Michiru. She placed a chair next to where Michiru was laying and set the tray support over Michiru’s lap before sitting down. As Michiru held the chopsticks up with both hands, she asked:  
“Setsuna, would you mind bringing some liquid wasabi in a small bowl?”  
“Michiru…”  
“Please? My head is spinning…”  
Setsuna stood up and went back to the sink. There she reached over and opened the upper cupboard to get the small bottle of liquid wasabi. She shook its content into the smallest bowl she could find and brought it over to Michiru.  
Michiru picked it up, briefly held it in front of her and turned it over her mouth at once. Her face turned red, a few tears poured from her eyes, and she coughed dryly as she struggled to not let the bowl fall down.  
“Feeling better?” Setsuna asked, some could say in jest.  
“No… But I can reason a little more now. For instance, I’m never doing that again.”  
She said as she desperately reached around for a cup of water that wasn’t there. She then saw Setsuna stretching one over to her. She quickly grabbed it and drank it at once. When she finally catched her breath, she looked emptily into the food tray.  
“How do you fight your own daughter, Setsuna? How can I keep looking her in the face and lying to her?”  
“The answer is simple: tell her the truth.”  
“There’ll be hell to pay.”  
“You are already paying it. The way I see it, avoiding your fate is only prolonging it.”  
“But why? Why did she have to remember? Why now?”  
Setsuna didn’t answer.

***

Another uneventful day of school and another day where Hotaru’s mind was elsewhere; when she was picked by some of the teachers to answer a question or another, they were surprised and disappointed to see that the girl who knew everything was barely acknowledging them let alone knowing the answers. Her classmates were all whispering about what happened earlier today at the entrance.  
Chibiusa had avoided her whenever she could up until then. Hotaru thought about pressuring her one more time, knowing she wouldn’t have Michiru’s poker face and smoke screen. She sneaked up on her, in the break between classes amidst a large crowd of students flowing by, pushed her over to an empty corridor and to the wall with her hands on her shoulders and began her bluff.  
“Why didn’t you tell me?”  
“Hotaru, what…”  
“I spoke to Michiru yesterday, and your dear little “Puu”. How could you keep it from me all these years?”  
Chibiusa saw Hotaru’s unusual intense gaze and was frightened. She was a strong girl, but seeing her old friend turn a new leaf on her like that disarmed her.  
“So… you spoke to them?”  
“Yes! Yes, I spoke to them! Didn’t you hear of how Haruka dropped me today!? I was your best friend, and you didn’t tell me! What do you have to say for yourself!?”  
“Hotaru… I’m sorry… Not one of us wanted to dwell on the past. And you were lucky to not remember it at all!”  
‘Lucky’, Hotaru scoffed at the choice of words. ‘It’s a perspective thing’. Hotaru thought about what card to play next.  
“Where is Sailor Moon? Where is she now?”  
“Hotaru… didn’t they tell you? Usagi-chan…” Chibiusa thought twice about revealing her mother’s secret identity so recklessly “She was the one who brought you back.”  
‘Back?’, Hotaru thought. ‘Back from where? What in the world is she talking about?’ She felt a sudden dread over the matter, but continued:  
“What does Usagi-chan have to do with Sailor Moon? Are you implying that…?”  
Chibiusa quickly put her hands over Hotaru’s mouth.  
“Shh, don’t say it!”  
Hotaru shook her friend’s hand away and was growing impatient, the temptation to demand a simple straight answer strong. “Who told you about my past? Setsuna?”  
“Tell me…? Hotaru, I was there!”  
“Nonsense! You’re almost the same age as I am! You can’t possibly remember!”  
Chibiusa turned her head in confusion.  
“Hotaru… did Michiru really tell you anything?”  
“Chibiusa… do you remember the oath we took at our summer vacation years ago? The one you made me agree on?”  
Of course Chibiusa remembered. It was their first vacation on the same countryside that they would always return to afterwards. They were both over a picnic cloth over a hill clearing with a view to the far away ocean and the other houses over the hill, the sunset to their side and the wind gently blowing the green grass around them. Chibiusa was living the happiest time of her life, a resting time after all the duress, with her best friend Hotaru who was alive and well. She wore a light pink skirt overalls over a white shirt, and Hotaru wore a grayish blue skirt overalls over a striped wine-red and green shirt.  
“Hotaru, let’s make a promise.” She stretched her pinky and offered it to Hotaru “Best friends forever! Let us always be there for one another!”  
Hotaru looked up at Chibiusa, a high-pitched voice coming out of her mouth.  
“Ok!” She smiled adorably and extended her pinky as well to lock it with Chibiusa’s “Best friends forever! For better or worse!”  
Hotaru now remembered she was much smaller then, looking to be around six or seven of age. Chibiusa was older and taller than her, feeding and cuddling little Hotaru, her best friend, in her lap.  
“But… That’s not possible!” Hotaru blurted, all of her body shaking “Is Michiru right? Am I really going insane!?”  
“Hotaru…”  
“Tell me, Chibiusa!” She shouted “If our friendship means anything, tell me!  
Chibiusa looked down and then sideways. Hotaru finally let go of her, still distressed.  
“I’ll tell you, Hotaru. Please calm down.”  
The students on the corridor had all vanished, silence seeking in. Chibiusa took her time to find out how she was going to break it down to her friend.  
“… Hotaru, years ago we were all senshi.”  
“Senshi?”  
“Yes. Like Sailor Moon. You, me, Usagi, Minako, Setsuna, Michiru, Haruka… The whole gang!”  
Hotaru felt the whole thing farfetched.  
“Uhuh…”  
“And Professor Tomoe, er, your father, well… He was… Possessed by an alien host that…”  
“Chibiusa, stop it! How dare you make fun of me and my father!”  
“But it’s the truth, Hotaru!”  
“First you won’t tell me anything. Now you just concoct the most degrading lie I’ve ever heard!”  
Hotaru started to weep and put her hands in her face to hide it.  
“I don’t know you anymore! I don’t know Michiru anymore! I don’t know… myself anymore!”  
“Hotaru, wait! Let me finish! I’m not lying!”  
Hotaru walked away. Chibiusa wept for her friend as well, infected by her sadness and pain. They didn’t speak or see each other anymore that day,  
After school, Hotaru didn’t have anywhere to go. Going to cram school was an exercise in futility; her head was in too much turmoil and filled with things. The thought of going home early for Michiru and Haruka filled her with dread. So she just wandered aimlessly around the streets downhearted.  
At one point, she heard a familiar voice call out to her:  
“Hey, ping pong girl! You got some nerve to show your face around here! You should run before I kick your ass!”  
Hotaru looked at the other side of the street to see the twisted face boy she exchanged table tennis bouts with almost a week ago. His two companions were there as well. She wasn’t in the mood to suffer through fools today, so she quickened the pace with clenched fists, crossed the street and stood just in front of him looking up to his eyes.  
“I’m not afraid of you.” She said dryly.  
Saburo was surprised for a moment, and then angry. He raised his hand back to show his thoughts on the matter, only to find he couldn’t thrust them forward; Ren was holding it.  
“She’s got control of the situation, Saburo. If you hit her now you’ll only embarrass yourself.” He said.  
Saburo willingly and grudgingly lowered his hand.  
“Besides, I don’t want another run in with the police because you’ve been hitting girls in the middle of the street.” Turning to Hotaru, he asked “Where is your friend today?”  
“Yeah! Where is “red light” girl! I still got something I want to share with her!” Saburo interrupted, which prompted Ren to hit him in the nape with the palm of his hand.  
“It’s none of your business.”  
“Aren’t you feisty today?” Ren hung his head back, looking at her in amusement “None of the class from the other day. You know, I still haven’t forgotten the lesson you gave me.”  
“And right you shouldn’t!”  
“Why don’t you let me make up for the hard time these two idiots gave you and your friend?”  
The fake blond girl quickly grabbed Ren’s arm tightly, having her own idea of what was going on.  
“Ren! No way! Don’t let this up nosed loser hang with us!”  
“Kotono here would be very upset if you tagged along. Wouldn’t you like to see that happen?”  
“Sorry. I don’t hang with rabble.”  
“Is that so…? Well it’s clear you’ve got too many better things to do. Let’s go guys.”  
They left. Saburo jeered at Hotaru and raised his head up as he turned to leave while Kotono held on to Ren’s arm, looking back and sticking out her tongue at Hotaru. It was getting dark now, the street lights turned on, and Hotaru didn’t even remember much of the way she zigzagged to get here. She still didn’t want to go home and still didn’t have anywhere to go and dealing with those kids had made her forget her troubles a little. She thought of something stupid, and told herself she’d regret it very much. But then she weighed what was already going on in her life and how she was kidding herself.  
“Um… Hold on a second!”  
The little trio stopped and turned, confused. Hotaru ran up to them, and after she catched her breath she said:  
“You said you wanted to make up for me. What did you have in mind?”  
Ren and Saburo looked at each other in confusion. Kotono never took off her eyes from the up nosed loser.  
“Uh, did I say that? I must’ve been talking out of my ass.” Ren replied.  
Hotaru was shocked at his rude choice of words, but replied:  
“I’m sorry I called you people rabble. Let me make up for you too.”  
Ren and Saburo exchanged glares one more time.  
“How do you do it, Ren?” Saburo asked, half in jest and half in amusement.  
“Shut up, Saburo.” He replied in his spirited way.  
He turned his face to Hotaru and added:  
“I’ll tell you what; we’ll let you try and keep up. Don’t stick too close or people will know you’re following us and you’re kinda embarrassing.” He kidded.  
“Uh, thank you, Ren-san.” Hotaru bowed.  
Ren wasn’t too pleased with being addressed to by his name from a stranger, especially not so formally. He thought about getting on equal grounds.  
“What’s your name anyway, girl?”  
“Huh? I’m sorry, I am Hotaru Tomoe.” She bowed again  
“What’s up with all the pomp? Are you mama’s girl? Teacher’s pet?”  
Hotaru smirked where she stood, with her hands in front of her hips.  
“Are you just going to put me to the test all night long? I thought you had somewhere fun to go. You’re not going to let me down, are you?”  
“Ren, I don’t like her. I think she tries too hard to be cool.”  
“If you don’t like her Kotono then that’s already a point in her favor. Now let go of my arm, it’s getting numb.” He shook her away, and looked at Hotaru. “Hotaru… like the insect?”  
“Yes!” Hotaru was glad he caught the reference, and it showed on her face.  
“Let’s go then… Hotaru.”  
They walked down a few blocks, Hotaru purposefully lagging behind. They reached a crowded and dirty street, where people were gathered ‘round to go inside a nightclub. Hotaru caught up with the people she was following as they showed their ID’s to the entrance security. Hotaru was blocked as she tried to get in.  
“Can’t you let her off the hook, Ryuu? She’s cool.”  
“Sure. After she’s shown me some ID.”  
Hotaru had to search her backpack for it and delivered it to Ryuu. Meanwhile Kotono was pulling Ren’s arm along and Saburo was just as impatient.  
“Like I thought, she’s underage. The police have already been doing surprise busts here and Shouta-sama will have none of it. Get rid of her.”  
“Well, looks like you can’t keep up after all kiddo.”  
“But…”  
“Nice talking to you.”  
Ren turned his back to her and left, Kotono after him with a satisfied look on her face. Hotaru knew none of those three were twenty; fake ID’s were the only possible answer.  
Alas, her little trip was for nothing. She looked at her cellphone and noticed an unanswered call from Michiru, a call she wasn’t going to return. She had a long way to go home now.  
After a good one and a half hour of travel she was finally turning a corner into her house’s block. She saw the lights on from outside and was relieved to see there was no one at the living room after stepping inside. No dinner either. It didn’t matter. She went straight for bed. Had she paid more attention she would’ve noticed Michiru staring at her from her dark bedroom’s window when she headed for the front door.

***

Hotaru had woken up from a peaceful sleep, languidness possessing her as she lay under her soft sheets. Soon enough the spell was broken however, as her memories of her recent life seethed in and tortured her once more like a permeating miasma. She did not want to go to school or do anything, but staying in bed felt like a worse torture. With no choice, she got up and put on her school uniform and tied her red bow over the mirror atop her study desk. Once she was done, she gazed at her own reflection for a second: she saw a disheartened young girl with a shadow looming over her face. She eventually snapped out of her self-pity, and, looking at the time, grabbed her red backpack and went downstairs. Setsuna was waiting for her by the opened front door, wearing a black t-shirt, jeans, a red purse resting on her right shoulder and holding a pink bundle with both hands over her waist. And once Hotaru finished descending the last set of stairs she greeted her with a bow and said:  
“Good morning, Hotaru-chan. I’ll be taking you to school today. I’ve got your breakfast in this bundle; there’s also some juice inside a plastic bottle in it. You’ll have plenty of time to consume it over the school gate; we’ll be leaving early as I have my obligations over at the studio.”  
“Plan B didn’t work, so Michiru goes for plan C?” Hotaru arrogantly replied.  
Setsuna didn’t answer. As Hotaru was headed outside she stopped by the door next to Setsuna for a moment, and turning her head up to face her asked:  
“Have you been telling Chibiusa to keep secrets from me?”  
Setsuna closed her eyes and replied:  
“Yes, a long time ago.”  
“I want to know what it is…”  
Quietly Setsuna reached for her purse and pulled a strange gold colored hand mirror made of marble. Its back had a flat protuberating teal-green surface with what Hotaru recognized was the symbol of the planet Neptune in its center.  
“Here… I was going to give you this after I had dropped you at your school, but since you demand answers…”  
Hotaru held it with both hands, confused; it was much heavier than it looked. The mirror itself was worn and scratched, and could barely reflect anything. Other than the material it was made in, and the sculptured ornaments bordering the glass it seemed like just another ordinary mirror.  
“How is this…?”  
Setsuna interrupted her.  
“Your mother has agreed to give in to your wishes. She and I feel it’s useless to try to explain it to you; you’ll have to feel it, like you already are. It will accelerate your process, but I fear there may be a price to pay for your impatience. Whenever you can make free time, stare at the mirror. But for all that is precious do not lose it!” Hotaru was startled a bit at Setsuna’s sudden tone raising, unlikely of her. She continued “Michiru only asks that you do not let it spoil your studies, and that you go to cram school today; she already knows you’ve skipped it twice now. For myself, I ask that you do not let anger get the better of you.”  
Hotaru didn’t know what to say, she just stared at the hand mirror. She thought it all very ridiculous, but Setsuna was so solemn and serious… Her family may be many things, but fools and pranksters they were not.  
Setsuna borrowed Michiru’s family sedan and brought it over to the front of the house. While Hotaru waited she looked over Michiru’s, and by extension Haruka’s, bedroom window. She wasn’t sure if she wanted Michiru to be there or not, but either way she wasn’t. She stepped into the sedan, and Setsuna had already scratched the gear box as she tried to go for first. Hotaru could only stare at her blankly. Throughout the trip Setsuna never dared to go past second, cursing under her breath that Michiru’s sedan had an old gear shift transmisson and asking why she couldn’t just buy a newer model. ‘And Michiru says I’m the one living in the past!’ she thought to herself. She had to stretch her arm outside to let the other drivers behind her know they could - should – just go by her whenever they could. Hotaru saw when Setsuna started to sweat after one of them angrily blasted his horn at her; she couldn’t think of anything else that startled her as much as driving. What a contrast from yesterday’s deadly experience! She softly giggled, but the minute Setsuna noticed her she reassumed her grumpy face, crossing her arms to make it clear she had not forgotten or forgiven. Setsuna looked at her with her typical nonchalant face, feeling her suppressed giggle stung more than her bad attitude.  
Once Hotaru was finally dropped at school, there were only a few other students who had also arrived too early. Most were sitting down and studying, a few others chatting. Hotaru sat down by the gate pillar and stared at her new piece.  
“Michiru… what are you up to this time? I hope this isn’t some weak philosophical argument you’re trying to raise.” She said to herself.  
She vainly tried clearing the mirror with a tissue she carried with her. ‘Whatever practical use this mirror once had…’ She put it in her backpack, and decided to catch up on her academic obligations that she’s been lagging behind as of late. She realized for a second how much better her life was, and would be, without all this mess going on. ‘How did it all start again? Michiru acted weird, then Chibiusa… Oh, Chibiusa… I didn’t want to be mean to you, but how do you act when your life seems to be shattering around you all out of a sudden?’ She thought maybe it wasn’t too late to make amends, but she was so busy! Michiru had asked her not to miss cram school anymore, and she didn’t really disagree with the idea.  
“Papa, I fell and hurt myself…”  
“Hey, you!”  
Hotaru brusquely woke up; a lot of students around her were walking inside the gate, and the doorman stood right next to her.  
“The bell has rung; get busy!”  
And Hotaru’s busy day started.

***

After what seemed an eternity, the weekend had finally arrived! Hotaru had stepped out of her Saturday morning cram school, and though she was supposed to also study back home, she had other plans.  
“Moshi-moshi, Tsukino residence here, whom am I speaking with…!? Oh, Hotaru-chan! Long time since you last called, neh!? … Of course, I’ll get Chibiusa right away!”  
A brief pause and the sound of steps ensued.  
“Hello..? Hotaru? What is it?”  
“Chibiusa… Can you forgive me about the other day? I’ve been unfair and feel ashamed. I would like to rectify my behavior to you.”  
“Huh? You’re apologizing?”  
“Do you want to go someplace today?”  
“I’m sorry Hotaru, but I’m studying right now… Come over…? Sure! Usagi, can Hotaru come over…!? Sure, Hotaru! Come over…! I’ll see you soon, bye!”  
A few minutes later, Hotaru arrived at the Chiba apartment front door. Usagi and Mamoru were long married now. Though by custom Usagi would take her husband’s family name over her own, Mamoru felt that since he never got to know his parents too well he’d much rather honor hers. He was a trainee doctor at St. Luke’s International Hospital now. Top of his class at college: his prominence and dedication already shining through, being voted by his classmates as “most likely to succeed”. And Usagi… was still struggling to become the sophisticated and knowledgeable woman she felt her husband deserved. Mamoru had promised his wife they’d be getting their own house “anytime now”.  
Usagi opened the door for Hotaru with a joyous smile. She wore a pink long coat and jeans, while Hotaru herself wore a collared long sleeved white shirt and black leather pants.  
“Hotaru-chaaan! Welcome! It’s been so long!”  
“*Giggle* Usagi-chan! Thank you for receiving me.” She bowed.  
“No need to be so formal; please come in! I’m cooking something for you and Chibiusa.”  
Hotaru stepped inside. Chibiusa leaned by the hallway entrance, her arms behind her back, still uneasy about Hotaru. She wore a sleeveless pink shirt and a jeans short.  
“Hello, Chibiusa-chan!” Hotaru bowed again, and her smiled thinned “I’m… sorry. Sorry for being so rude, I…” Chibiusa slowly shifted her weight from the wall, and then quickly rushed towards Hotaru, grabbing her hands and raising them just over their faces.  
“It’s ok… Hotaru. That’s what friends are for, right?”  
Hotaru overcame her initial surprise, then tilted her head and smiled.  
“And I’m very thankful for it!”  
After they settled and sat down, Usagi served them lemon pie, her cooking skills vastly superior from years ago.  
“Eat fast Hotaru, or Usagi will do it for you.”  
“Hey! It’s only fair; I cooked it!”  
“Except she’s our honored guest and has privilege!”  
‘Oh… there’s that…”  
Hotaru giggled.  
“Don’t worry about me, I’m fine.”  
“Our honored guest said it’s alright! She has the final word.”Usagi quickly grabbed the bowl and left, which prompted Chibiusa to protest in vain.  
“Usagi, you rude overgrown womanchild!”  
She hung her head on the table, placing her arm over it.  
“Oh, why did you have to say that?”  
Hotaru thought they were a lovely family, ever since she first met them… Again the confusion… she tried not thinking about it, feeling it already messed her head enough. She couldn’t resist hoping her interactions with Michiru were this “simple” though. Then again, Haruka was a lot like Usagi at times; she felt maybe she should’ve appreciated her more. Why did she always lean towards Michiru anyway, she wondered. ‘Oh Hotaru, there you go again!’ she reproached herself. Once they were finished eating, they proceeded to Chibiusa’s bedroom for studying. Hotaru’s larger knowledge and experience of the topics studied aided Chibiusa immensely; she was very grateful she happened to drop by. As they were nearing the end of their studies, Hotaru began to doze off, her head constantly falling over Chibiusa’s shoulder.  
“There!” Hotaru was scared awake, Chibiusa clamming her book shut “We’ve finished, thanks for helping Hotaru!”  
“Uhuh.”  
“Hotaru, have you been sleeping well?”asked her worried friend.  
“I don’t know... I mean, I’ve been sleeping just fine. Maybe it’s because I’m not eating as well as I used to.”  
“You should look into that. We don’t want you getting sick again like… Uh!” Chibiusa regretted mentioning the troublesome topic again.  
Hotaru only looked at her with her heavy lids and soon smiled, pressing her cheeks.  
“It’s alright, Chibiusa.”  
Chibiusa smiled uneasily. Hotaru looked at her cellphone. Usually Michiru would have called her by now asking why she wasn’t home yet and where she was. It made her feel ridiculous - still being called around by her mom - ever since she was fifteen. Now that Michiru stopped doing so, avoiding her in the last few days, she felt bad in a different way.  
“So… What do you wanna do now?”  
“You know… we never did get to play a little table tennis, just you and me.”  
“It’s getting kinda late Hotaru, we don’t have many clubs we can go… please don’t!”  
“Why not? It was a bar, right? It’ll probably be still open and still free… I mean, now that Ren paid our “membership”, right?”  
“Ren…? You remember his name?”  
“I have a good memory, remember?”  
“Right… Anyway, I really don’t want to take the same school route I take every regular day on my weekends. And besides, we risk running into those idiots again.”  
“I’m not afraid of those clowns. And I think I’ve taught them a lesson, they’ll respect us this time, if they show up.”  
“I don’t know…”  
“C’mon! It’ll be fun! We can go anywhere else from there.”  
Usagi was roaring with laughter over at the living room, all of a sudden, as she took hold of the TV. She was viewing a silly live show about dogs standing up and mimicking dance by shaking their frontal legs roundly in the air. Chibiusa made an annoyed and angry face as she threw her weight over her study desk.  
“Fine, let’s go.”  
As Chibiusa closed the apartment door and they were both walking down the hall, she said to her friend:  
“You know, you’re not the only one looking to get out.”

***  
The neighborhood street bar was crowded this time, given the time and the day. Mostly by middle-aged men and up who sat quietly by their small tables scattered in the back room. They were all dressed modestly with loose clothes and some even wearing flip-flops; lower working-class people. Not one of them dared to smoke and pollute the atmosphere. The ambiance was certainly light, not as strict as a full-blown bar. The short, mustached owner looked their way disapprovingly from the counter, recognizing them, before he set his eyes back on the newspaper he was reading, his frown never leaving his face. Chibiusa was next to Hotaru, still panting from the bus trip and the good walk she made to get here; Hotaru not so much, a thin smile on her face. As they were crossing the counter into the back room, without taking his eyes of the news the owner addressed them:  
“You know, this is not a place for little girls. I don’t need you two attracting attention and making my customers think twice about hanging here.”  
Chibiusa, always the one to hate being preached on, back talked:  
“Two dames like us would only add class to this rundown inn of yours. I’m sure your customers won’t mind at all, especially not the creepy ones.”  
“What!? I should kick you out right now!”  
“Oh, sure. Lay your fingers on two fragile girls, that will make your customers think twice…” She put her hand on Hotaru’s back and turned her around, pushing her towards the back room as she spoke.  
The owner popped a vein in his forehead, but resumed his reading with a mumbling under his breath.  
“Chibiusa… He could very well do what he says.” Hotaru whispered to her friend.  
“Oh, don’t worry Hotaru. The barking dog never bites; he’s just a grumpy, bitter barman who has every reason to hate his life. Besides, it’s better to die on your feet than to live on your knees, right?” She winked.  
“Right…”  
As they took a few steps towards the back room, they certainly were the center of attention. Two old men were using the table tennis, playing competently, albeit slowly, but nothing impressive. When they noticed the two girls staring at their playing, they each offered their racket’s with a smile on their wrinkled faces. Even though Hotaru and Chibiusa quickly and nervously hand waived the offer with wry smiles of their own, they would have none of it and stepped out. The two girls each went behind their side of the table.  
“Now remember Hotaru: be good to me!”  
“*Giggle*Of course, Chibiusa. That’s what friends are for.”  
“I don’t ever want to get on your bad side.” ‘Again’, she thought.  
So they started. Hotaru played her soft game, adjusting it to Chibiusa’s progress and alertness. She would every once in a while throw a twist here, change the speed there to keep her on her toes, punishing her whenever she threw herself too much on one direction or stuck too much on a corner. At one point, after Chibiusa was done warming up, they had managed to throw twenty seven consecutive swings at each other, Chibiusa finally losing from exhaustion. The bar locals cheered on with claps and praises, someone screaming “Ichiban”, the two old men standing up next to them and clapping as well. Hotaru and Chibiusa were utterly embarrassed by this. The latter went around the table and unceremoniously grabbed her friend by the arm escorting her back to the counter. There, they were both sweating and panting, especially Chibiusa. When she wiped the sweat off her brow, she said:  
“You were right, Hotaru; this was fun! But I really think I need to hydrate myself now.”  
She faced the bartender, still reading and unaltered by all the commotion from back inside.  
“Hey! What do you have to drink without alcohol in here?”  
“…Water.”  
“What!? What kind of shoddy business are you running!?”  
“A bar! If you don’t like it go someplace else, as you should! And don’t you dare bring something from another store in here!”  
Chibiusa could have steam coming out of her ears with how angry she was becoming; Hotaru placed her hand over her shoulder to calm her down.  
“We’ll take water.”  
The barmen proceeded to pick up two cups and fill them with water… from the sink.  
“That’ll be eighty yen.”  
“What!?” Chibiusa was legitimately shocked.  
“Do you know how high the water bill is these days, huh!? I have a business to run!”  
“I wouldn’t drink that filthy water if you paid me to do it!” Chibiusa protested.  
The two wranglers threw their weight over the counter with both hands, staring furiously at each other.  
“Come Chibiusa. You shouldn’t wear yourself out over someone like him. It’s not worth it. We’ll find some other place to hang out.”  
“Yeah! We’ll find a place that’s not a piggery, run by a pig!” She turned her eyes away from the object of her hate just as she finished the sentence and thrust herself outside.  
The bartender looked as Chibiusa left, then gazed his eyes upon the standing Hotaru. She half-bowed to him and said:  
“Thank you for letting us use your table.” And looked back at him contemptibly before turning to follow after Chibiusa.  
Outside, they both looked around for a grocery store; Chibiusa was too upset to say anything or even look back to her friend. Once they got around one and bought their beverages, they sat at a table by the nearest public square they could find, facing each other. It was dark now and the public lights were on over the carefully tended grass and the light beige walkway, and the city around the square was bursting with activity, with some people roaming inside the square as well. Chibiusa was having packaged juice and she sucked on her straw with a frown still on her face, while Hotaru quietly looked around sipping her can of tea, but very much thinking about her friend’s state of mind. She put her shoulder and the can on the table, circling her finger around the can’s lid - an unconscious act from circling a tiny spoon over actual tea - and tried to release some tension:  
“I guess we’re not playing table tennis so soon anymore, huh?”  
“Idiots. Everywhere I turn there are idiots. It’s like the world is made up of them…” Chibiusa said as if mumbling to herself, gazing into nothingness and still sucking on her straw.  
Unbeknownst to Hotaru, because of this last altercation Chibiusa was reminiscing her frustrations with failed friendships she never told Hotaru about, from times when she looked for something other than her friend’s closer to home friendship. And then there were also her past love interests, her aggravations with her mother especially... All conspired to keep her broody. Hotaru sighed, and deciding not to try to placate her friend any further reached for her backpack and the hand mirror inside it. She stared at it, the mirror still scratched and useless. Had she looked up, she would see Chibiusa had roused from her tantrum with a worried look on her face as she saw Hotaru pulling back her hair and staring at the mirror intently with a smile on her lips; she knew what that mirror was. Hotaru was distraught when the mirror was suddenly taken away from her, a familiar face, wearing a creased blue shirt and jeans, staring at it trying to fix its nonexistent hair.  
“Hey, this mirror is all scratched!” The boy said with a disappointed, whining tone.  
“Maybe in its wisdom it knew better than to reflect your face, Saburo. Haha!” Said the girl wearing a poor excuse for a black, outworn Lolita dress.  
“What… Hey! Give it back!” Hotaru protested and tried to reach for her hand mirror, only to have Saburo raise it over his head to keep it away from her.  
“Yeah? What are you gonna do, huh?”  
“Speak of the devil! Give it back to her you dweeb!” Chibiusa had stood up and joined in the altercation.  
Saburo lost his sense of glee as he looked at Chibiusa.  
“Oh look, its “red light district” girl.”  
Chibiusa was equally annoyed to be given that nicknamed, and replied:  
“Oh look, it’s “sexually frustrated” guy.”  
Chibiusa’s comeback had worked; Saburo was angry and his attention switched entirely to her. She quickly thought of throwing her empty, squeezed package in his face, kicking him in the knee and running off with the mirror and Hotaru. Just then a shout from behind them was heard.  
“Saburo! Cut it out, you’re attracting attention again.”  
Ren was approaching them slowly, a cigar in his mouth and holding two brown bags with bottles on them on each hand.  
“But Ren-san! We have to show them this is our turf!”  
“Shut up. Everyone’s looking at us already.” He handed over one of the bags to Kotono, who was already hopping and fawning over him, and picked his cigar from his mouth, relieved he could finally blow the smoke away from his mouth.  
“Hey, where’s my bottle?”  
“It’s not my fault the two of you rushed ahead like a bunch of kindergartens, leaving me behind. There’s no way I was going to bring three bottles with me; I shouldn’t have brought two already.”  
“But Ren-san…!”  
Meanwhile Chibiusa was trying to sneak behind Saburo and grab the mirror from his careless hand. She was taken aback when Ren looked at her and said:  
“You! Old fart-head Katashi told us that because of you we’re not welcome in his bar anymore. Seems you two said or did something to tick him off.” Ren didn’t seem upset at all, a smirk on his face instead.  
“That’s what I came in after them for, Ren! To teach them a lesson! You never brought them over in the first place!”  
“Shut up. Saburo. Don’t you get it? Katachi will never stop selling us beer, no matter what he says; his heart’s an abacus. It’s not even worth telling him we didn’t bring ’em. Now give the girl her mirror back. You look like a fruitcake holding it.”  
Saburo turned around and gave Hotaru’s mirror back to her, letting out a contemptuous snort. Hotaru looked intently at the trio as she held her hand mirror in her arms, and felt disgusted inside when she saw the fake blond girl turn over the contents of the bottle in her mouth.  
“You’re… not old enough to drink.”  
Ren looked at her with a blank expression and said:  
“Yeah? So what? Are you gonna turn us in?”  
“I think she would, Ren-chan! She’s a spoiled little uptown girl, just look at her clothes!” Said Kotono, grabbing on to his arm.  
“Kotono, when I want your opinion I ask for it. Now let go of my arm.”He shook her away, much to her chagrin.  
Hotaru continued:  
“That night by the nightclub… You had fake ID’s didn’t you?”  
Chibiusa looked at her friend in confusion, surprised she had anything to do with them.  
“Yeah, I’m sorry you didn’t. I hadn’t thought about it.”Ren replied indifferently. “Shou ga nai, eh?”  
Chibiusa barged in the conversation, her curiosity stirred up:  
“Fake ID’s? How did you guys managed to get that?” She asked, crossing her arms and raising her eyebrow.  
“Oh! Kotono here is an artist! You should see what she can do with a computer and a scanner on her hands!” Saburo said lightly and pointing at his friend, suddenly in a good mood.  
Kotono was shocked, and after Saburo finished his sentence she festered up. Tilting herself forward towards him she yelled:  
“Saburo, you dolt! Why don’t you say it out louder!? I think the couple by the table over there didn’t hear you well enough!”  
Ren looked on at the two girls with a grin on his face. He inhaled another bout of smoke from his cigar and after blowing it out he asked them:  
“Why are you two asking? You looking for some?”  
“No way!” Chibiusa moved closer to her friend and grabbed her by the arm “ We don’t want anything to do with you losers. Go find your missing parents or something, we’re leaving. Right, Hotaru?”  
She pushed her friend around, not waiting for a reply and they both started to leave, Chibiusa a bit nervous about turning her back to them. Saburo made some poor imitation of Chibiusa’s last sentence which was interrupted shortly by Ren’s slap in his nape. Once they were away, Chibiusa looked worriedly at Hotaru and said:  
“Hotaru, what is this story about a nightclub?”  
“Uh? Oh, Chibiusa, I just ran into them by accident that night. It was the night we argued by the hallway… I was angry…”  
“Whatever! What’s done is done, but I don’t want you hanging around with those guys anymore. They can’t tell their arms from their arses. I’m starting to regret ever taking you to that bar.”  
Hotaru turned to face her friend.  
“How did you learn of it anyway?”  
Chibiusa was caught by surprise, and she put one hand behind her head and hand waved with the other, smiling nervously, and replied:  
“Oh, our art club senpai took a group of us somewhere and it was along the way…” She assumed a serious face again and resumed her speech “Either way the point is we won’t be going there anymore or around anywhere near these guys’ neighborhood any longer, right?”  
Hotaru turned to face ahead again, her face and voice indifferent.  
“Right. We’ll never see them again.”

***

Hotaru woke up on her bed. She rubbed one of her eyes and stretched herself around the bed, pushing her sheet aside. She sat on the edge on the bed for a moment, slowly got up and went for her study desk a few steps away. She noticed Michiru’s hand mirror had a strange pale blue light glowing from it and went to check it. Just as she reached for it the light faded away. She inspected it closely and noticed her reflection could now be seen clearly on it. She put it down on the desk once more and stared at the decorated mirror hanging over it. She smiled this time, feeling things were slowly working themselves out. Her smile turned into a teeth-baring grin, her semblance malicious. She was not expecting her reflection to stretch its arms out of the glass and grab hold of her neck in a split second…  
Hotaru woke up on her bed, frightened. She looked around in her dark room and tried to recollect what day it was meant to be. She heard a motorcycle engine downstairs, coming from outside and into the garage. She quickly sat by the edge of her bed, feeling vexed and still tired, a light headache kicking in. She remembered she was studying earlier this Sunday morning, and eventually settled for a nap just before noon, thinking it would only take fifteen minutes out of her studying… “Didn’t I set the cellphone alarm?” She reached for her cellphone over her study desk. Sure enough it was set and the alarm did ring, it just wasn’t enough to get her to wake up. She rubbed her brows with one hand, figuring today was a lost day. She looked at the hand mirror lying on the desk: it was still scratched and worn and not reflecting anything. She heard noise downstairs and figured that’s where she was headed next.  
She slowly climbed down the steps barefooted wearing only her long light blue coat that almost reached her knee, holding on to the rail.. Haruka was by the kitchen sink, pushing things away and arranging it angrily, making a fuss. She still wore her mustard motorcycle leather jacket. She noticed Hotaru coming down the staircase over her shoulder, but didn’t say anything. She resumed her fuss, grabbing a few condiments from the upper cupboard.  
“Hi…”  
“Hi yourself!” Haruka replied without turning back.  
“Where is everybody?”  
“Away from you! Michiru and Setsuna are out on some trip. And they asked me to come home and cook the little baby her dinner!”  
“I can cook for myself.”  
“Yeah? Well, too late! Now you’re gonna eat whatever I cook you!” She looked around the kitchen cupboard, frustrated that she didn’t know where most of everything was. When she finally found the cutting support[?], she just about threw it at the sink “Now where is that damn grater? God, why can’t they just store things in intuitive, reasonable places!?”  
“It’s in the lower cupper board further to the right, in the back.”  
“I didn’t ask your help!” She put the grater over the sink and went back to scavenging the cupboards for what she needed. “Now where’s the kitchen oil!?”  
“It’s in the cart next to the table.”  
“Oh, right…” Haruka saw how ridiculous her situation was, but she just shrugged it and started peeling, then grating the onions, trying to keep her foul mood.  
“I’m sorry…”  
She was not expecting this however.  
“Yeah!? Well not as sorry as I am! You have no respect for what I put up with for you! Don’t you understand? Michiru doesn’t have the courage to get mad at you. I mean, really mad at you. And that makes me your whipping boy!”  
“I understand…”  
“Do you!? Then never mistreat her again!” Haruka filled one of the pans with water, opened a soba package and threw it in to let it soak and resumed her grating. Quietly she missed her summer break together with Michiru; with the kids - Hotaru and Setsuna - gone, they felt like children on an amusement park. At least, Haruka felt like she was a ride for Michiru, a ride she would hop in and out of whenever it pleased her.  
Then starting to drop her conniption, she added:  
“She’s the glue that connects everyone, you know? If you start to butt heads with her you’ll only disrupt the harmony of this house. I know she’s… difficult sometimes but if you just let her have the last word and feel herself so important it’s easier for everyone.”  
Hotaru didn’t really agree; she felt she had the right for answers. Nevertheless, not looking for more heated arguments, she complied.  
“Yes, I understand.”  
“Good.”  
Haruka thought of Michiru once more; these days it was rare of her to admit anything nice about her. She reckoned all she’s said about her lately to other people were warnings about the wolf in sheep’s clothing and complaints of how she kept holding her dreams back because of her. She thought of her partner’s soft, white skin in the breeze and the way she stared at her just moments before they kissed with those penetrating eyes. ‘Maybe I should tell you again what you really mean to me Michi, like in the old…’  
“Haruka…?”  
“Yeah?”  
“Who was Sailor Moon?”  
Haruka stopped cutting the toppings in surprise, but soon enough resumed it.  
“Some… crazy girl in sailor suit who fought crime. I don’t know.”  
“Would you keep secrets from me?”  
“Oh, Hotaru!” Haruka paused her slicing, putting the knife down and her hand over her neck and stretching it left and right “Why can’t you be the helping girl you used to be? You were so eager to please back then…”  
‘Because I didn’t know then you people had skeletons in your closet.’ Hotaru thought to herself, feeling offended by Haruka’s remark. She felt maybe it was a time for a soft approach. ‘Let’s see if I learned anything from Michiru’. She pulled a deep sigh and feigned resignation.  
“Back then… we were happier, weren’t we?”  
‘We sure were.” Haruka had resumed her seaweed chopping, indifferent.  
“I miss those times… Let me make up for you and all the annoyance I’ve caused you… I’ll bring you pajamas, how about it!? That jacket looks tight. And you must’ve worn it all night!”  
“Don’t worry about me. I’ll be in my room as soon as I finish this.”  
“Please! As a sign of our truce?”  
Haruka slowly turned around to look over her shoulders, one of her eyebrows raised. She turned her face back and said:  
“Fine. Knock yourself out.”  
Hotaru went to her mama and papa’s bedroom to collect Haruka’s mustard with green side stripes pajama. She hurried downstairs and headed towards Haruka, standing right behind her.  
“Hey… What are you doing!?” Hotaru had started taking off Haruka’s jacket unprompted, stretching her arms over her front zipper and pulling it down, interrupting her cooking.  
“Gotta get those dirty city clothes away from my food.”Hotaru was already pulling the jacket through Haruka’s arm, her white undershirt appearing.  
“Stop it!” Haruka protested. But secretly this made her reminisce Michiru’s own delicate undressing of her, and it put a smirk on her face.  
When Hotaru started pulling her undershirt up as well that’s where she drew the line.  
“Enough! Keep your hands off private property! Geesh, if you want me to put the pajamas so much – give them to me – let me do it myself!” She took a few steps from the sink counter, took off her undershirt to be covered only by her bra and quickly put on the large, comfy pajama coat. She turned around to face Hotaru, her arms up.  
“There! Happy now Madre Teresa? What’s up with you turning a new leaf on the flick of a wrist anyway?”  
Hotaru didn’t answer, instead throwing the pajama pants right at Haruka, who grabbed them with a surprised look.  
“You forgot those.”  
“Fine, weirdo! Turn around then, this ain’t no peep show.”  
Hotaru turned around. Haruka turned as well, mumbling something under her breath.  
“There! I’m done now. Now if I may…”  
Haruka saw that Hotaru had taken over her seaweed chopping for her.  
“What the…! You little mongrel, that’s my cooking you’re messing with!”  
Hotaru didn’t lose her cool, and merrily continued her chopping.  
“You were almost finished. Go lounge by the sofa a bit, we’ll be having dinner together soon enough; from here we just have to let the noodles boil a bit. It’s my favorite dish, remember?”  
Hotaru turned her face and tilted her head to gift Haruka with her sweetest smile. Haruka only scratched her head, and shrugged, feeling she was the only sane person in this house. She indeed lounged for the sofa, lying down on it as she finally felt all the tension in her muscles charge their due. She put her hands over her face and let go a deep breath. She hadn’t show up in her house in a while now, knowing when it was best to lay low for a while. Michiru had given her an ultimatum over the car so it wasn’t entirely her fault. She slept around old acquaintances houses like a high school kid, when she didn’t just sleep in the back of her tiny, tiny Ferrari backseat parked in the middle of the street at night.  
In sharp contrast, she remembered her first days with Michiru, how when they first met Michiru tried everything to get her attention, stalking her, asking to paint her au naturel, saying something or other about faith and destiny and the sea… Then when they were somewhat settled how she would fawn to her and listen and obey to her commands, being her faithful shadow, letting it be clear that it was her, Haruka, who had the upper hand, who was the prize… Was it all a lie? Was she just waiting until the tie was knotted to show her real self? Waiting for Haruka to step into her home territory, where she had the advantage? And was this how every guy felt when he married his sweetheart? ‘I’d sure feel like I was castrated, if I had any balls… Maybe we’re not too different from a regular couple after all…’  
In the past days she hung around a few nightclubs, breaking her drinking fast, rationalizing that Michiru broke it first. The temptation to break her vows was strong, as she felt that by the end of the summer break her spouse had cast her aside like a broken toy; was felling vulnerable after their fight; was denied her favorite hobby; and felt her dreams were held back for nothing in the end. She remembered the smiles and scent of other women who approached her, and she’d resist and tell them she was taken at first. But at some point she stopped caring, missing the human contact and that sudden rush of blood into the face too much. With the help of booze she reawakened her old cocky, flirtatious self, dancing around a little too close for comfort with other women. She was torn apart between staying or leaving when one of them, a fashion and hair dress style soul mate that reminded her of River Phoenix, had taken her to the quieter dark back room and rubbed her cheek softly with her smooth back hand. As if a sign of heaven, Haruka’s cellphone rang, breaking the spell between the two. It was Michiru and she was asking her to look after Hotaru, who was by herself at home today. She put her hand over the phone, trying to mute the surrounding noise as she replied and noticing her dance partner had walked away. She went to the warehouse to grab her old sport bike - since she knew the Ferrari wasn’t welcome in her home’s garage anymore - drunk and more than a little annoyed. ‘So much trouble over a kid’, she thought. ‘A kid that has started back talking, stealing too much attention, and has been nothing but trouble since day one.’  
Just then she noticed an almost filled glass of wine held next to her face, and moved her head up to see the extending arm was Hotaru’s and that she held another glass, with just a finger of wine in it, closer to her. She immediately sat up, her hair a mess.  
“Hotaru, what on earth! I don’t drink anymore. And you shouldn’t be drinking yet!”  
“It’s just a little wine silly. It’s good for your health. You know Michiru drinks a glass every day, right?”  
“Not anymore since last week’s debacle, she doesn’t.”  
“Well, let’s not think about that; a toast, Haruka?”  
Hotaru helped a dazed Haruka into holding her glass, and toasted it as soon as she finished opening and closing her grip around it. Hotaru took a very small sip and took her time to savor the wine in her mouth. Haruka sighed, thinking about the drinking binge she just came back from. ‘If I didn’t know you any better Hotaru, I’d say you are trying to comatose me’.  
“You know something, Hotaru? If you really want to make up with me put in a good word for me with Michiru. She’s… distant again.”She looked at her glass bottle and shook it a little “Sometimes I feel like Setsuna is the go to person for bonding, and I’m just the gigolo… Don’t tell her I said anything though!”  
“Oh, of course Haruka-san! I’ll tell Michiru how helpful you’ve been. And don’t worry I won’t say anything about your jealousy of Setsuna; she’d use it against you until the end of times.”  
“I’m not jealous of Setsuna! That’s ridi…!” She saw Hotaru didn’t flinch in her smiling “Ugh, whatever…  
Haruka finally decided to sip her drink. It was then that Hotaru felt it was time to let the hammer fall.  
“By the way, remember when we were all senshi?”  
Haruka spit her drink over the small front table and the sections of the carpet that were on the way.  
“*gasp* What…!? How did… I mean…”  
Hotaru was studying Haruka’s every reaction, examining how far Chibiusa’s wild story was true.  
“There’s no need to make such a fuss about it. Michiru told me… We had a little predicament, and that’s why she left, you know?”  
“But…! She said…”  
“Said what?” Hotaru questioned innocently, as if only lightly curious.  
“She couldn’t…!”  
“Why yes! Me, you, her, Setsuna, Chibiusa, Usagi, Minako… the whole gang. All senshi. That’s what she said.” She nodded gravely.  
“So you know!” Haruka’s eyes were wide with terror “…Aren’t you mad!?”  
“What do you think?”  
“I…” Haruka put her wine glass away. ‘So that’s why Hotaru is being so nice; she’s trying to poison me!’ she thought.  
“Hotaru, we were on a lot of pressure… Don’t hate us! It was a long time ago, we were different…”  
“Oh silly, stop making such a fuss; you should listen to yourself.” Hotaru was growing more and more confused with all of this; she thought it was starting to get ridiculous even, and she felt more annoyed than angry now. “Let’s see, what else she said? Oh yes, that my father was possessed by an alien host…”  
“…”  
“So, tell me again.” She stared right at Haruka’s eyes, bending forward and placing her hands on Haruka’s knees, a dead serious gaze on her face “Who was Sailor Moon?”  
Haruka moved her head back away from Hotaru’s face, cowed.  
“… It was Usagi-chan, of course! She intervened for your… I mean, she saved your life! Didn’t Michiru tell you that!?”  
“Oh, she did. I couldn’t make much sense of it though.” she stood back up and giggled, but inside she was still weighing everything and opted to follow an old intuition that was plaguing her “But you know, the part where she said I used to live with my father was the most intriguing… I still don’t get it.” She looked up and placed her index finger next to her chin “I remember being a young girl in his arms, and yet I remember being even younger with you two. How do you explain that Haruka? Souichi Tomoe and you two weren't acquainted then, were you? I don’t see why we would see each other before ev…”  
“Hotaru, stop asking me things! Michiru should have told you! You came back an infant, and then…”  
Hotaru looked at her, puzzled. What did she mean “came back”? From where? And how could she come back as…an infant? More and more all of this raised more questions than answers, but there didn’t seem to be much in the way of an alternate explanation, and Hotaru was looking past the silliness of it and craving to know more.  
“Then…”  
“I’m tired, Hotaru! How could Michiru have this talk with you alone; she told me she had plans to bring everyone together when the time came!” she quickly got up, and looked one last time at Hotaru “I don’t deserve this! I do everything I can to help, and this is what I get! It’s like you people take pleasure in torturing me. I could just leave one of these days, you know?”  
Haruka walked toward the staircase, vexed. Hotaru did not sympathize at all, and called out Haruka one more time out of sheer spite.  
“Haruka.”  
“What! What do you want!?”  
Haruka had turned around quickly and Hotaru stared at her for a second, hands over her waist. And she smiled and said:  
“You didn’t actually believe what Michiru told me, did you? You know how capricious she is with her answers when she doesn’t want to be straight. Usagi-chan fighting crime in a sailor suit, senshi, alien hosts… She didn’t even try to make it sound plausible this time. You’d have to be drunk to make sense out of it… You haven’t been breaking your drinking oath have you, Haruka?”  
Haruka stared at her, crossed.  
“Go to hell.” And started to climb the stairs. But she had one more thing to say, which she did in a low-tone without looking back “Sometimes I want to strangle you. Or drown you in the bathtub. You can believe that.”  
Hotaru didn’t expect to be hit back with such precision, flashes of her dream coming back in full force in the back of her mind. Haruka proceeded to her bedroom, locking the door and putting a chair under the knob to be on the safe side; she didn’t doubt anything. Back downstairs Hotaru shrugged her shock away and turned around to, with a hand on her waist, see the mess Haruka had spitted on the floor. She opted to clean it up and took a little of her time to scrub the floor and roll the dirty carpet. Just then a thought crossed her mind and she rushed to the oven to turn off the fire; the noodle had burned. Didn’t matter; she threw it away and scrubbed out the stuck food in the pan as best she could. She went on to throw the carpet in the laundry basket and afterwards stretched her arms and yawned, glad she was ready to sleep again after having just done so. She went to her room and closed the door, looking around. Her eyes fell on the hand mirror once more. She took it, and lying in bed she raised it over her head with both hands, inspecting it. She felt her eyes lid become heavy, and she hugged it in her chest and slept.  
…  
…  
“Don’t stand too close now, Hotaru.”  
“Papa, look… what is that?”  
…  
“Hotaru! Hotaru! Oh my God, no! Please, anything but this!”  
“You, I can save your daughter for you… for a price.”  
“What…!? Yes, anything! If there is something you can do, please save her! I’ll do anything! Anything!”  
“Very well then. Your body and hers are now mine. Hahahaha!”  
“Aaaaahhhhh!”

***

“I’m telling you Michi, she seemed to know everything. She said you told her.”  
“I believe you have been played with, Haruka dear. Why didn’t you trust my word when I told you we’d all set things straight together.”  
“It wouldn’t be the first time you decided something behind my back.”  
Michiru sighed, already feeling the weight on her shoulders again after just coming back from a pleasant weekend exodus with Setsuna. They had arrived in the early morning, Setsuna cut short of getting herself ready for work by Haruka’s update on them.  
“Well… What did you tell her? I want the precise words.”  
“Not much, Michiru! I asked her how she knew so much and… that Usagi saved her… and maybe that she came back… as a baby…”  
“Oh, dear…” Michiru was trying to connect the dots with the very little information given, wondering how much Hotaru did know. She was alert for a second and asked Haruka “Did you tell her how we…! You know…”  
“No! At least, I don’t think so…”  
“Haruka! It’s important!”  
“… No, I didn’t! But she was acting very weird. For a moment I even thought she meant to kill me.”  
“Ara…” Michiru was angry at how stupid Haruka was sometimes “What do you think, Setsuna?”  
“I’m afraid my guess is as good as yours.” Setsuna was the only one not shaken by this, the same somber look and languid reply that were typical of her. Even though she never meant Hotaru harm as poignantly as the other two did, she still felt responsible for the quiet acquiescent attitude she had taken about it. Unlike the other two, she was too experienced with feelings to let them dominate her in the surface.  
“Could the mirror be working that fast? I wasn’t sure it could even still do anything after all these years.”  
“It’s working Michiru. Trust me.” Setsuna replied.  
“What if… what if someone else told her? She’s been asking all of us, yes? Who else is close to Hotaru.” Michiru said teasingly, very much knowing the answer.  
“… Small La… Uh, Chibiusa is very close to her.” Setsuna naively answered the rhetorical question. “It is likely.”  
“More than likely, Setsuna-chan. Something tells me she’s not into it as she’s trying to make us believe.” Michiru felt she knew enough of Hotaru to know how she’d react if she really knew; that’s what made her uneasy from the start. “Talk to Chibiusa and tell her to keep away for now.  
Setsuna took a deep sigh.  
“Michiru… You’re avoiding the inevitable again. You already agreed on letting her know. Besides, this will draw Sm… Chibiusa to the crossfire, and we’ve already asked for her cooperation once.”  
“Well apparently we weren’t succinct enough before then! Try to be a little more persuasive this time!”  
Setsuna took another big sigh, knowing that Michiru was letting her emotions get the better of her yet again. She was too used with serving others to not do as she was “requested”, but she still felt she was obliged to warn her friend one last time before following through.  
“Do you think this is fair to Hotaru?”  
Michiru raised her finger in Setsuna’s direction and had her mouth open for a quick reply, but she stopped short and hugged herself, looking down and thinking.  
“She’ll never forgive me, Setsuna-chan.”  
“It was a choice we all made back then. We knew it came with a price, and I say it could have been much worst. Escaping your faith is the coward’s way.”  
Michiru scoffed.  
“Coward… I despise that word, Setsuna.”  
Setsuna didn’t answer. Michiru pressed her elbows hard, then walked back and forth as the other two watched, always looking to the ground. She eventually looked up to see the line of pictures on the desk, all of them happy pictures of a united family. She hung her head for a short while then turned around.  
“I want everyone here in the living room tonight. I’m ending this charade today. And the devil may care!”  
Setsuna nodded and left to get ready for work. Haruka just stood there with her fists clenched and a sour look on her face. Once more no one had asked her input on the matter, but in truth she didn’t really want a say in it anyway. She hated having to remember the past and all the things she was willing to do once; it brought some of her old self back into the fray as well. Michiru was turning around to head for her bedroom upstairs, when something she’s been noticing finally clicked on her: Haruka was still in her pajamas. She looked at the back of her wrist for the time.  
“Haruka, did you take Hotaru to school today?”  
Haruka looked at her, still with a face and distracted from her thinking over.  
“… No. I didn’t find her anywhere around the house today. I guess she went by herself.  
“What?” Michiru raised an eyebrow.  
“What’s so surprising about this? She obviously didn’t want to have anything to do with me.” Haruka protested, not wishing for yet another scolding.  
Michiru looked away, just noticing she forgot to consider how all of this would affect her daughter’s academic performance, besides everything else.  
Elsewhere, Hotaru walked along a pathway among leveled green fields, the cloudy, bright blue sky over her head and the songs of birds echoing in the distance. She wasn’t wearing her school uniform, having decided on missing class today well before leaving the house. Instead, she wore her field excursion pick: her old heavy, bluish dark gray skirt and jacket over a light violet collared shirt. As she made her way past the entrance and into the huge courtyard in the back, she addressed one of the nurses with a half-bow.  
“Please excuse me, I’m looking for Professor Souichi Tomoe.”  
“Oh, you must be his daughter, yes? He’s by that tree over there near the fountain, with his physical therapist.”  
“Thank you very much!”  
As she headed to the tree next to the fountain she could see her father holding on to his therapist’s arm, still struggling to regain his walking balance.  
“That should do it for now Tomoe-san. Don’t be disheartened; the Hindu say that physical exertment is a great way to keep your memory working. They usually have disciples digging large holes for that purpose, so consider yourself lucky.”  
“Oh, Arata- san. You know that even with mental health problems I would never believe that nonsense!”  
And they both laughed. Arata noticed Hotaru near them. When Souichi Tomoe noticed his company was looking at something, he slowly turned to see what it was. Hotaru half bowed politely to the therapist, who returned the gesture and adressed her father.  
“Tomoe-san, do you remember me…?”  
“I’m…afraid not little girl. Can I help you?”  
“It’s me, Hotaru! Please, think really hard!”  
“Hotaru… Hotaru… Oh! Hotaru!” He took a step forward and almost tumbled down, but Arata held him up. He quickly proceeded into placing Tomoe in his wheelchair, motioning Hotaru with his head to place it behind him, which she quickly did.  
“My! You’ve…grown so much!” Arata finished placing him in the chair, adjusting his arm and legs to make him comfortable. Tomoe had a genuine smile on his face “It seems like only yesterday you were a little baby in my arms!  
Arata smiled and motioned Hotaru to grab the wheelchair’s back rods.  
“Feel free to take him inside. Take your time.” And he left.  
And so Hotaru pushed her father along the pathway, with cricket’s chirping around them announcing the peace and quiet of the courtyard.  
“And so, Hotaru, what have you been up to? Tell me everything!”  
“I’ve been studying a lot.” She looked into the distance thinking of the irony of what she was saying as she was shirking class today. “ Papa…”  
“Umm?”  
“Do you remember the time we lived together? As a family? You used to hold me up, remember?”  
“Of course I do… Some of it. You made us so happy; I still remember the feeling. And I was fortunate enough to have your mother come along and bring you to my experiments.”  
After a pause Hotaru continued.  
“Papa, do you remember mother? I woke up one day and I couldn’t remember her face anymore…”  
“Oh yes, Keiko… how is she?”  
“She’s… fine, papa. You… wouldn’t have a picture of her, would you?”  
“I don’t think so, Hotaru. My life’s been plundered in every form. My fortunes are managed by curators, and I can’t touch them without a doctor checking me and discharging me as able again. This reminds me… You do know that inheritance will be yours when you come of age, right?”  
“Yes, papa. We’ve discussed this many times.”‘With Michiru around, of course’. Hotaru hated her again for having so much control over her life and her father’s money. And now she couldn’t care less about money for it did not buy her peace of mind.  
“Good, good… It’s the least I can do for you. But, other than that, I don’t have anything else left other than the clothes I wear. Not even my memory, right?” He turned around to look at her with a feeble smile. In truth, he had thrown away or destroyed everything personal to him when his mind wasn’t his own. Hotaru felt pity for him.  
“I’m sorry…”  
“Don’t be! I’m very happy here.”  
“How can you be happy!? You don’t even remember your own life! It’s horrible!” She couldn’t help but lose her temper, hating her father’s condition very much, relating herself to him.  
Tomoe turned around to look at Hotaru, confused.  
“I’m sorry I upset you, dear.”  
“No… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you…”  
There was a silence between them. Her father turned his head to look at and appreciate the morning. He noticed the fountain to his right. “Oh, look. The fountain is not on today. Pity, it’s so beautiful. I wish you could see it.” Hotaru gazed at it, uninterested. She had seen it many times before. “Anyway, I am happy here. The food is good, the facilities are very pleasant, the people are friendly… Don’t feel sorry for your poor, broken old man.” He turned to smile at her again. “Look at you, you’ve grown so much! It seems like only yesterday since you were a little baby in my arms.”  
‘I know, papa. But to me, it feels like it was much, much longer…’ Hotaru felt she was done talking at this point. They turned at the pathway leading back inside the hospital, and after another minute of silence they made it inside and a nurse, who bowed at them gently, took over for Hotaru.  
“Goodbye, papa. I will visit you again.”  
Tomoe turned his head around, looking at her blandly.  
“I’m sorry, but who are you again? “  
Hotaru started tearing up.  
“Nobody.”

***

The school bell rang one last time in the late afternoon, marking the end of today’s clubs activities. Soon enough the inner courtyard and the gate’s exit was bursting with action, many students rushing themselves out, followed by a company of more contained ones quietly heading home. Chibiusa was one of them, pensively staring at the ground, wearing a blue coat over her school shirt and her old bunny backpack in her shoulders.  
“Hello, Chibiusa-chan.”  
Chibiusa was surprised for a moment and then looked to her side. It was indeed Hotaru as she could tell from her voice.  
“Uh, Hotaru? Why didn’t you come to class today?”  
“I… had other things I needed to do. Are you going home now?”  
Chibiusa lowered her head a bit, staring worriedly at her friend.  
“Yes. I’m sorry but I can’t go out today, I need to study. You… you should be at cram school by now.”  
“Oh no! I wasn’t going to ask you out. Actually I was wondering if I could go by your home and help you in your studies again!” Hotaru said, merrily.  
Chibiusa felt her friend’s sudden joy and excitement rather disturbing, quite unusual of her.  
“Hotaru… I really think you should go to your cram school.”  
“Oh, Chibiusa… To tell you the truth, my mind is too busy right now to focus on that… I’d much rather help you out; it’s something I enjoy very much!” She held her hands in front of her face, her eyes almost glistening in her puppy-like pleading.  
Chibiusa was uneasy, not sure that was such a good idea. She did not have the courage to say no to Hotaru however, whose gaze wouldn’t leave hers.  
“Fine… Let me just call Usagi” She still felt she needed to remind her friend to be more formal with things like this, however. “You’re lucky she is very easy going though, what with dropping by people’s home at the start of the week!”  
“Oh! I’m sorry, Chibiusa-chan, so sorry!” She bowed twice. “Maybe I should go home instead, eh?”  
“You already asked now, didn’t you!?” Chibiusa said, angry that her friend was shirking her responsibilities and acting so strange and pathetic. Hotaru quickly stiffened up, staying still with an awkward smile on her face. Chibiusa reached her mother on the phone, said a few words and everything was set.  
“Let’s go then.” She said dryly.  
So they waited by the bus station and took the bus when it arrived, not exchanging a single word. Hotaru was squeezed on her seat by the window, her hands over her lap, an uneasy smile on her face, and Chibiusa kept her arms crossed the whole trip. When they arrived at the Chiba apartment, Usagi opened the door, shouting a big welcome at the two of them, just as Chibiusa was about to open the door herself with her own key. She was naturally upset at the surprise. They stepped in, taking off their shoes and putting on the slippers by the door.  
“Please make yourself comfortable, Hotaru! I’m preparing something right now for the two of you!” Usagi said, turning her back to them.  
Chibiusa went for the living room, Hotaru following her. She looked over at the kitchen counter. Usagi had her back to her; she wore a white coat, a teal short and a pink apron. She was almost finished molding the mochi, and was now cutting passion fruits and taking off the thick, seedy juice with a spoon and throwing it at the blender’s funnel filter to sort out the seeds. Hotaru wondered if this really was the same person Haruka mentioned, the one who allegedly saved her… Usagi felt Hotaru’s gaze upon her, and turned her face over her shoulder to catch Hotaru by surprise, making her stiffen up.  
“Hotaru-chan, are you gonna start coming here more often again? Because if so, I’ll buy more food.”  
Hotaru quickly and vehemently shook her head.  
“Oh no, Usagi-chan! It’s just this one more time! So sorry!”  
“Don’t apologize! You know you’re welcome here.” Usagi smiled tenderly “It gets awful lonely in here, even with Chibiusa. You see, after all these years she still hasn’t learned to treat her mother right!” She directed an accusing glare at her daughter, who was waiting by the hallway entrance for Hotaru. Chibiusa did not feel like entering another argument with her mother however, her attention over Hotaru. She approached Usagi by the counter, and turning and looking at her friend said:  
“Hotaru-chan is very busy these days, Usagi. She can’t afford to come here all the time just because you want it. Right, Hotaru?”  
“Y-Yes, of course!”  
Hotaru looked at the two Tsukinos. Chibiusa was only an inch shorter than her mother now. Usagi herself barely seemed any older, with the exception of maybe a slight increase in her height. And again it didn’t add up how they could possibly be mother and daughter. She had always found it strange, but dismissed it as Usagi not being her biological mother… except that they very much looked more and more alike as Chibiusa gre ‘Just add to the pile of things that don’t make sense’ she thought, annoyed and frustrated. Chibiusa quickly turned around the corner and grabbed Hotaru’s wrist, pulling her to her room.  
“C’mon. We have to study, right? Let’s go.”  
Hotaru was pulled to Chibiusa’s room, who proceeded to throw her backpack into her bed and take off her blue coat. Hotaru caught herself from being moved around so fast and asked:  
“So… What did you learn today at school?”  
Chibiusa was untying her collar bow as she answered:  
“Trigonometry, Heian period literature, Chemical Equilibrium, the Phylogenetic tree probability calculation… So boring.”  
She put her untied bow away in the drawer in the small table by her bed where her lamp stood and reached her backpack to pick up a series of books and place them onto her study desk.  
“Here, I’ve bookmarked where we stopped. Just turn a few pages back.” Hotaru gazed at the books for a moment, then noticed her friend was staring at her attentively with a frown, and she smiled at her “Listen, I really need a bath. Make yourself comfortable and, I don’t know, catch up with what you’ve missed today.”  
Chibiusa opened her closet and grabbed her folded blue pajamas in the lower cabinet, standing back up and heading for the bathroom without looking at Hotaru. Hotaru in turn looked at the four books lined up on the desk. She sat on the chair in front of it and started to browse them quickly before Chibiusa would be back. She realised with terror that she hadn’t studied these topics before, now dreading the possibility of further shaming herself in front of her friend. She told herself to calm down, and remember her speed reading routine she developed for all those classic literature books she read once. First, the Heian literature: it was really just a bunch of short excerpts from timeless books, some of which she remembered she read from start to finish once. That was covered, next. Chemical Equilibrium: it boiled down to formulas. She reached for a notepad she didn’t bring; reminding she didn’t brought her backpack with her. She teared a page from Chibiusa’s notebook, hoping she wouldn’t mind, and copied the formula down and read and re-read it until she burned them in their mind. Quickly she went for Trigonometry: This was slightly harder, but keeping her cool she first redid a few warm-up exercises of small-angle approximation, which she already studied, and then jumped in into the numerical analysis of triangles. Finally, the genetic tree: as was the case with biology, it was mostly name memorizing, only this time a few arithmetic formulas were being introduced as well. She began to write down the Fitch-Margoliash least squares method for…  
“By the way…” Hotaru was frightened off of her concentration “You don’t mean to sleep over today, do you?” Chibiusa had appeared. She was standing by the doorway wearing her pajamas, her long hair loose, and drying herself behind her ears with her towel.  
“Uh, no.”  
“Good. Because I don’t want to give you spares, and you know my uniform doesn’t fit you anyway.”  
She approached her study desk to see what Hotaru was doing, making the latter slightly uneasy. Since she couldn’t really make out any of it, she continued:  
“Now get up from my chair will you? Go grab a bench by the living room.”  
Hotaru did as she was told, only to almost bump into Usagi by the doorway as she brought the passion fruit juice cups in a tray.  
“Usagi-chan, I’m sorry I…”  
“Oh no, Hotaru! Excuse me! I’m the clumsy one, remember? Anyway, refreshments for the both of you hardworking students! – She said the last line almost in singing.”  
“Usagi, place it over my bed, will you? We’re kinda busy.”  
Usagi dropped her smile immediately to a despite-ridden grimace. She still placed the tray over the bed however, and then glanced over Chibiusa to see what they were studying.  
“My, I don’t envy you girls one bit!”  
Chibiusa made an angry face, thinking it rude to have someone look over her shoulders.  
“Usagi, go read something your level. Like the funny papers.”  
Now this was too much for Usagi, who grabbed Chibiusa’s ear and gave it a tight push, not minding that Hotaru was right behind them witnessing everything. Her voice was raspy.  
“ Now listen here you annoying brat! I don’t see Hotaru’s chair, are you going to make her study on her feet!?”  
Chibiusa wrestled and tried pushing Usagi away, to no avail, as she was sitting too close to the desk and moving away only it made it hurt more.  
“Argh, Usagi you moron! Let go of my ear!”  
“Wrong answer!” And she pulled it tighter.  
“I told her…! To grab one in the living room!” She said in a whiny voice.  
“Told her!? To mistreat me is bad enough, but to be a prick to our honored guest…! You’re soiling my good name! Go get it yourself! Now!” Usagi pulled her ear back before finally letting it go, making Chibiusa’s chair rock back and drop her to the ground.  
She quickly got back up and protested loudly, tears almost dropping out of her eyes:  
“Usagi, you could have hurt me!”  
“Serves you right!” she replied, crossing her arms and raising her chin.  
“I’m almost sixteen; you can’t do this to me!”  
“Well you don’t act like it. Now get going!”  
“I hate you! I hate you!” She protested as she made a turn for the hallway, snorting. Hotaru was slightly amused when this started, but now she wished she were anywhere else. Chibiusa came back with the bench in no time, thrusting it on the ground before crossing her own arms and yelling once more:  
“Mamo-chan will hear of this!”  
“Oh yeah!? I’m not afraid. The minute I tell him you’ve yelled at your poor mother again he’ll stick by my side, as he always does.” Usagi feigned being hurt and almost crying, then she had an evil grin on her face as she bent down a little to make her face meet Chibiusa’s “Besides, aren’t you almost sixteen? Are you still going to call daddy whenever things get a little rough? Oh daddy, daddy, I broke a nail, boohoo!”  
Chibiusa clenched her teeth.  
“You bet I will! Now get lost! Get out of my room!”  
Usagi walked herself out, raising her chin once more and letting out an indignant “Hmph”. Chibiusa rammed the door shut, pulling the skin under her eye and sticking her tongue out to the closed door. Hotaru was agasp, struggling to remember how the short bursting moment came to happen in the first place. Still, there was something familiar about all of this in her head, as if she lived the same scenario once, and not with Haruka or Michiru...  
Chibiusa proceeded to sit at her desk, picking her chair up. She tried reading one of her school books a little, but soon enough picked it up and threw it on the ground. She laid her arms on the desk and began to sob. Hotaru realised once more in a long time that she wasn’t the only one with problems. She picked the book on the ground and tried offering it to Chibiusa.  
“Go away.” She said, in a way that didn’t sound angry, only hurt.  
Hotaru wanted to apologize for being the center stage of this, but she felt it would only make matters worse. She wanted to offer her the passion fruit juice, knowing that its properties were soothing, but she was afraid Chibiusa would thrust it aside to the ground with her hand.  
“You know, you need to study. You got homework don’t you?”  
“Do yours then! Miss dropout!” She continued to cry, ignoring Hotaru “...Puu… *sob*”  
Hotaru had kept all her angst inside these days, feeling terrible and even like dying. It was something she wouldn’t wish on her worst enemy, let alone her best friend; she was angry now. She opened the bedroom door and stepped into the living room, Chibiusa looking on in confusion. Usagi was there, her mochi ready and lined in the tray, which she was holding with a wide open smile on her face.  
“You!”  
Usagi stood still, doubt now in her face and her smile dropping.  
“How dare you treat your daughter like that! You could’ve hurt her! She’s in her room crying because of you! And for you to tell her she soils your name! You do it yourself! And because of me! I’ve never felt so embarrassed in my whole life!”  
Hotaru was indeed mad: she would never dare to speak up to people in their own houses otherwise. She was expecting consequences, but was surprised and it showed when instead she saw Usagi had dropped her elbows, her smile had disappeared into a trembling mess, and tears were forming into her wide open, despaired eyes. She yelled as well:  
“Hotaru-chan, I’m so sorry! I’m so ashamed!” She bowed several times, the mochi tray still in her hands. Hotaru took a little while to react to this, but when she did she did it with authority.  
“Then go apologize to her!”  
“Hai!” She threw the tray into the sink counter, and rushed to Chibiusa’s room. Chibiusa heard everything with wide eyes; when Usagi stood by her doorway, tears streaming down her cheek, she yelled:  
“Chibiusa, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt you!”  
Chibiusa pulled back her breath and yelled with all her force:  
“You’re an idiot! And I hate you and I can’t stand you anymore!”  
“I know!” Usagi threw herself at her knees next to Chibiusa, holding her right hand with her left hand and the other one on her lap. Her whiny voice spoken through her nose “I’m sorry, I can’t help it! I try! Don’t be hurt because of me! I love you! I’d die for you!”  
Chibiusa teared up a lot, in sync with her mother. She finally let go of her anger and yelled:  
“I know!” She rushed forward to hug her from her chair, placing her chin over her mother’s head “And I wouldn’t let you do it!”  
And they both sobbed and hiccupped in their hugging for a short while, with Hotaru by the doorway now. If she didn’t feel this was rather pastiche to how normal emotions work, she might’ve had shed a few tears herself instead of staring in disbelief. No matter, the problem was solved in her eyes, in a spectacularly effective way. Usagi got up, clearing the tears from her eyes. She picked one of the juice cups and handed it over to Chibiusa.  
“Here. We both lost so much water now. You need to refill.” She giggled softly.  
Chibiusa grabbed the cup and sucked on the straw, her face still glaring red.  
“Not so fast now. You’re still hiccupping.” She turned around to leave, cleaning another tear from her cheek and softly touching Hotaru’s shoulder so she could pass and head back to the living room. Chibiusa stopped drinking her juice to breathe a little, and after she catched her breath she said:  
“Thank you, Hotaru. *Sniff* I won’t forget this.”  
Hotaru had her arms behind her back, staring with a neutral face. She felt life was funny; she had come here seeking solace, and instead it was her who ended up delivering it. Still, she realized helping someone else find peace helped her find it as well.  
“Don’t mention it.”

***

“So, the stoichiometric ratio by mass of gasoline is fourteen point seven to one. “  
“Uhuh, right.” Chibiusa was just finishing her own demonstrative exercise on how to find fuel ratios.  
Behind them the mochi tray over the bed was empty, only crumbs of it remaining, the two girls deep into studying for the past hour. Chibiusa had ripped some of her notebook’s pages to let Hotaru answer and keep the exercises as well, and they had already covered math and biology and were now into chemistry; Hotaru felt it was important to start with the hardest subjects to get the ball rolling while they were still full of energy. Meanwhile Chibiusa felt once more that everything was flowing so fast and smooth that studying was almost fun, thanks in large part to her friend, who had taken full charge of everything.  
“No, no, Chibiusa. You’re already doing it wrong. First you must find out the molar mass of glucose.”  
Chibiusa turned her head to look at Hotaru, one of her eyebrows raised.  
“Here, let me do it for you. Six times twelve amu plus twelve times…” she wrote everything down on Chibiusa’s notebook “There! Now we can find how many carbon molecules are in it. Remember to use Avogadro’s number to get the answer.”  
“Hotaru… you’ve studied this before?”  
“…Sure.”  
They saved literature for last. Chibiusa whined on how it was all very boring, outdated and pointless.  
“Oh no, Chibiusa-chan! It was here that the Japanese language was appreciated for its aesthetics and elegance. Poetry was regarded as the highest form of literary art! The Tosa Nikki was written during that time. Oh, and so many women became prominent because of their writing! The Genji monogatari was written here as well, and so was The Song of Everlasting Regret and the Makura…”  
Chibiusa interrupted Hotaru with her giggling, after having watched her friend with a blank stare for so long.  
“Hotaru…You’re such a nerd!”  
Hotaru was caught off-guard. But she quickly pretended to be slightly upset raising her nose in jest.  
“Humph! Maybe I should leave you to it then!”  
“Oh no, forgive this lowly peasant! Please!” Chibiusa clapped her hands together, nodding under them repeatedly.  
Hotaru only crossed her arms, turning her face further away from Chibiusa.  
“Queen of nerds! I need your help! Don’t be like that! “She lowered the pitch of her voice to emulate Hotaru’s “You’d much rather help me out; it’s something you enjoy very much!” She held her hands in front of her and mimicked her pleading eyes from earlier as well.  
Hotaru dared a peek, and saw Chibiusa’s overdone simian smile in disbelief, and laughed shortly.  
“I didn’t look like that!”  
“Oh yeah! It was embarrassing.”  
“I have no idea what I was thinking.” She lied.  
“I do… you were grieving.”  
Hotaru gasped in surprise, barely holding her smile.  
“And overcompensating.” Chibiusa scribbled something on her notebook nonchalantly.  
“… Am I really that easy to read?” She smiled embarrassingly.  
“Sometimes, yeah. Listen, are you gonna help me out or what?”  
Hotaru complied, trying to explain the finer details again without getting worked up on it this time. They both answered their last set of questions, and both sighed simultaneously as they placed their pencils neatly to the side of the paper, leaned back on their seats and stretched their arms and legs in unison.  
“I can’t believe how fast this was, Hotaru. When I think you haven’t been giving your fullest at school anymore… What a waste!”  
Hotaru made a long face, and didn’t have the courage to look her friend in the eye. She leaned over the desk, her head down.  
“People I know at school are saying you’re turning into a slacker, and then we never talk again because of course I tell them to mind their own business.”  
Chibiusa got up all of a sudden, and Hotaru looked on over her shoulder as her friend grabbed a pink round comb from her table’s drawer and sat next to her again. She began to comb her long hair gently, holding it with her left hand, and continued:  
“You really should get a grip and get your plan of leaving home back on track. I’d never forgive you otherwise!”  
Again Hotaru only listened, knowing her friend to be right. Chibiusa continued her combing, but quickly grew weary of the silence.  
“So… are you going to tell me what was bothering you today, or is it a secret?”  
“Huh? Oh…”  
“Is it… Is it your past again? Did you talk to Michiru yet?”  
“No!” Hotaru burst out, and then checked herself “I’m sorry, no. She’s been avoiding me.”  
She didn’t really want to talk about it, but she saw her friend looking at her worriedly and gave in.  
“I visited my father at the clinic today…”  
Chibiusa didn’t say anything. The last time she saw Hotaru’s father her friend was just a little baby in his arms over the clinic. She had just been saved, and Chibiusa thought she’d never see her friend as she knew her again. Reminded of this, she was glad to see Hotaru as a teen she could talk and relate to. Even though she wasn’t sure if she should, as the price was her friend’s peace of mind. She placed a hand over Hotaru’s shoulder, which made her turn her face to see Chibiusa’s tender smile, not understanding.  
“You’ve been through a lot, Hotaru. Don’t be so hard on yourself.”  
Hotaru looked down again, pensive.  
“You know, Chibiusa… I know your mother gets on your nerves sometimes, but she’s always there for you. Through thick and thin, you know? “She moved her face away from Chibiusa to hide her tears.”  
Chibiusa tilted herself forward a little, trying to see her friend’s face, confused. She looked at her hands over the desk, a bit disheartened, then looked up to the wall.  
“It’s getting late; do you want to sleep over today, Hotaru?”  
“But you said…”  
“Never mind what I said!”  
Hotaru didn’t answer at first. After a while, Chibiusa continued:  
“You still have parents of your own, Hotaru. Haruka and Michiru love you too.”  
“I’m not so sure anymore. They’ve always loved each other first and foremost. And now they just seem like a bunch of schemers. Keeping secrets from me… I keep thinking that whatever it is, it’s something terrible. What if… What if they were responsible for what happened to my family? What if they are looking to usurp my inheritance?”  
“Hotaru, it’s not like that at all! What they tried to do was…”  
Hotaru stared at Chibiusa, who in turn swallowed hard and again felt responsible for her friend.  
“…Usagi is just by the living room. Do you want to go and talk to her about it?”  
“What!?”  
“I’m tired of seeing you like this. You’re right: you have the right to know. You won’t like it… But it seems there is no easy way around it, is there?”  
Hotaru didn’t know what to say. Yes, she wanted to know the truth more than anything, But now that it was being simply offered to her all of a sudden, she had cold feet. What if her worst fears came through and she couldn’t handle it? Chibiusa noticed her friend’s eyes twisting back and forth in doubt.  
“Well?”  
Hotaru tried to recollect, breathing slowly. ‘Why am I so afraid? It’s like I’m a bird afraid to leave its cage…’  
“I don’t want to upset Usagi-chan.”  
“This is far too important for you to worry whether or not you’re upsetting anyone. And besides, Usagi… she… she has a history with you. She would never lie to you; she’s the person to ask.”  
Hotaru eyes widened, not sure what Chibiusa meant by “history”. But then she remembered what Chibiusa and Haruka said about being “saved” by Usagi. She looked to the side nervously; bottom line was she wanted to know what it was all about; it was just a matter of being ready to face the consequences.  
“In that case… Yes! Yes, I want to talk to her.”  
“Then let’s go then.”  
Chibiusa grabbed her friend’s hand and pulled her towards the living room.  
“Wait! Let me do this on my own rhythm!”  
“Fine. I’ll wait for you in the living room. Don’t take too long now.”  
And she left. Hotaru weighed what was about to happen, panting softly. She uncreased her uniform, and marched to the living room. Chibiusa sat at the counter across the kitchen sink, drinking another cup of juice. Usagi was cutting onions and other vegetables, preparing Mamo-chan’s dinner. When she noticed Hotaru by the hallway entrance, she greeted her:  
“Hotaru-chan! Chibiusa was just telling me you two finished your homework. And so fast! She usually takes hours to do it.” Chibiusa frowned at her mother from her seat “Grab a seat!”  
Hotaru hasted to the other side of the counter, and practically threw her rump at the bench. She laid out her arms over the counter, still with a worried look on her face. She was slightly surprised when Usagi placed a cup in front of her and spilled the juice remains from the blender.  
“Here, a toast to your success!”  
Usagi turned around again to resume her cooking. Chibiusa nudged her friend with her elbow twice, prompting her. But Hotaru was suddenly courageless, and only looked down in renunciation.  
“Usagi! Hotaru-chan has something important she means to ask you.”  
Hotaru looked in shock at her friend.  
“Uh?" Usagi cut one last layer off of the onion, dropped her knife and turned around to face Hotaru, hands held together in front of her waist and a delicate smile on her face. Hotaru looked back at her still in shock “What is it, Hotaru? Ask me anything!”  
“Um… When is Mamo-chan arriving home?”  
Chibiusa turned away from her friend, throwing her hand over her face in disapproval.  
“Oh! He’ll still take some time. You see, he chose to undergo training in a department at the ICU wing these last couple of months, and he has to follow his emergency night shift tutor around - taking notes he says - during the odd hours. I asked him to go easy this year, but he had none of it.” Usagi was pantomiming dramatically: waving her arms around, holding her hands together in front of her face, placing them over her heart; always in line with whatever she was saying. Hotaru kept on listening: her hands together over the counter, nodding at intervals, amused and relaxed. “He’s such a giving soul, and he makes many friends over there and people are already beginning to respect him very much… But he didn’t stop to think about my feelings! All his work mates know he’ll step up to the plate whenever someone needs to do the rounds, and take it easy on his expense!” Chibiusa rested her head on her hand, tired of the same old talk. “So he stays out all day. But don’t worry; he won’t mind seeing you here.”  
Usagi resumed her cooking once more. Hotaru was awaken from her distraction when she noticed her friend looking at her with a blank face, her head jutted forward and her hands raised as if challenging her. Hotaru felt uneasy again, but spoke up:  
“Actually, Usagi-chan… “  
“Yes, Hotaru?” She smiled to herself, glad to be talked to.  
“I meant to ask you something else. It’s something that’s been on my mind for a while now…”  
Usagi abandoned her cooking again and dried her hands on the apron, stepping closer to Hotaru this time. She noticed her worried look, blinked twice, and had a worried look of her own.  
“What is it?”  
Hotaru hesitated once more, but eventually she began to let it out:  
“Back when we just met… When Tomoe-san was still…”  
She was suddenly interrupted by her ringing cell-phone. She looked at its screen in dread as it was none other than Michiru calling her. She didn’t answer, and the two Tsukino’s looked at her puzzled.  
“Uh, Hotaru… Aren’t you going to answer that?” Usagi finally ventured asking.  
“I’m sorry; no, I don’t think so.” And Hotaru denied the call.  
There was an awkward silence now in the living room. Usagi and Chibiusa exchanged glares, Chibiusa with a better lead on what was happening. The phone rang again, but this time Hotaru angrily turned it off, making a fuss. Usagi was naturally concerned, but she turned around to resume her cooking. It was only a short moment later that the living room’s phone began to ring as well. Usagi’s knife hit the cutting board loudly at the first ring, and she took a little while to leave the kitchen sink, having a clue as to whom it might be. She took a quick glance at Hotaru as she headed to the table across the hallway entrance where the phone was lying.  
“Moshi moshi! Tsukino residence, Usagi speaking…? Oh, hi Michiru-san… Yes, she is here… Of course, just a moment. “Usagi turned her head to look at Hotaru – It’s your mother Hotaru-chan. She wants to talk to you.  
Hotaru shook her head vigorously, not a word. Usagi was worried, and pressed the phone with her two hands, before speaking on it again:  
“I… don’t think she wants to talk to you, Michiru-san…” She turned to face Hotaru again “Your mother is asking me to tell you she’s being very insistent, and wants you on the phone right now.”  
“No!”  
“I’m sorry Michiru-san, but her mind is made up… Right… Right, I’ll tell her.”  
And Usagi lowered her phone by her waist, confused.  
“She said she’s coming over. And that you’re not supposed to go anywhere.”  
Then she suddenly turned her head to look at Hotaru, eyes wide and shaking a little.  
“Hotaru… Do you want me to stand up to your mother?”  
Hotaru opened her mouth wide in shock. Behind her Chibiusa was in shock as well, but a wide smile quickly formed in her face as she became filled with pride of her mother.  
“Yeah, that’s right, Hotaru! We’ll watch over you!”  
“Oh no, Usagi-chan, Chibiusa-chan! I couldn’t!” She stood up just so she could bow to the two of them; she was deeply touched by their offer, almost tearing up “Thank you! Thank you so much! But Michiru is virulent, and very petty in not forgetting the people who crossed her. I’d never forgive myself if you suffered because of me!”  
“And besides, I have to face this on my own.” She smiled “You give me courage, however, and for that I’m grateful!”  
Usagi put her phone back on the hanger, looking at Hotaru tenderly.  
“If you ever need us for anything, call us. We will be happy to help. Right, Chibiusa?”  
Chibiusa placed her hand over Hotaru’s shoulder.  
“Of course!”  
The two friends looked at each other affectionately. Usagi gave Hotaru a few more treats, and as if that wasn’t enough even packed her a bundle to go. Chibiusa picked her friend’s backpack for her, and then also helped her place it on her back.  
“I’ll take her outside and wait for her lift to come, mama.”  
“In that case, put on a coat Chibiusa. It’s cold outside.”  
“Right!”  
Chibiusa hurried back to her room, and Usagi rested a hand over her chin in amusement. It wasn’t often that Chibiusa referred to her as “mama”. She rushed back through the living room and to the front door, putting her shoes on. Meanwhile, Usagi was fixing Hotaru’s bow and dusting off her school shirt. Hotaru flushed a little at this, looking down.  
“Not so long ago I would have to bend to do this… You’ve grown so much.”Usagi said in whispering.  
“Um, thank you for taking me in today, Usagi-chan.”  
“No, thank you Hotaru. You do so much for my daughter, for Chibiusa. And for me as well.”  
Usagi held Hotaru’s shoulders with her hands, and unlike herself Hotaru dared to look at Usagi in the eyes. Only to find the most lifting, warm and delicate eyes she could ever remember seeing. It felt like liquid sunshine to her, the shadow of her worries dispersed.  
“Ok, I’m ready. Let go of Hotaru, Usagi; she can’t wait any longer!”  
“Right! Come again, Hotaru.”  
And the two headed downstairs to the wide glass door entrance, waiting outside for Michiru’s ride to arrive. Chibiusa leaned over the building’s wall, looking at the road stretching towards the end of her street in the night light, Hotaru standing next to her holding the strap of her backpack.  
“Your mama really is something else, Chibiusa.”  
“Pfft, tell me about it!”  
Then Chibiusa turned her head to face Hotaru.  
“I really want to see you studying hard, Hotaru! Promise me we’ll meet tomorrow at break!”  
Hotaru smiled, tilting her face to the side and closing her eyes lovingly. Then she did a mock serious face and straightened herself up, to the point of being on her toes for a split second.  
“Fine. If I don’t I’ll be in trouble, won’t I?”  
“You bet!”  
Michiru’s sedan arrived and pulled over by the entrance. She opened the passenger door and stared at Hotaru quite displeased from her seat. Hotaru motioned to hug her friend, who quickly stepped away from the wall and hugged her first, holding her tight. She whispered to her friend’s ear:  
“Good luck.”  
And they parted, waving at each other one last time. Hotaru got inside the car and closed the door. Michiru didn’t say a word and only pushed the car back on the road gently. But only briefly; a minute in and she pulled over at a quiet street.  
“Don’t you answer the phone anymore, young lady!? How dare you change plans like that without telling me!? And how dare you skip class and cram school today!?”  
Michiru had received a call from Hotaru’s school earlier in the morning, inquiring her as to why Hotaru didn’t come to class today. She tried reaching her on the phone then, Hotaru just coming out of her father’s clinic, only to be denied it the same way she was just a few moments ago.  
Hotaru didn’t answer her, only looking out the window sullenly, in a foul mood once more. And exhausted. Michiru pressed the steering wheel hard in aggravation, wanting to bash her. But she held on to her ways, feeling nothing warranted such primitive behavior, and that she should prove superior to Hotaru’s lack of manners.  
“Ara, just what do you think life is about!? Do you think I like throwing money away?”  
Hotaru still didn’t answer.  
“Are you going to keep up with this childish sulking? What are you, six? It’s not affecting me. How do you expect to be taken seriously, to be treated like a grown up with that kind of behavior?”  
And no answer. ‘Ignore me, will you?’ Michiru decided to play the hard sell.  
“You know, I could just send you away, Hotaru. If you’re not going to be productive at school anymore, maybe we can degrade you to something you can handle. A crying shame, really; I’ve seen what you are capable of when you put your mind to it. But I will never tolerate having a defeated project of an individual living under my roof. I could swear failure has its own pungent odor, and you’re starting to… Hotaru…? Hotaru!”  
Michiru reached out under Hotaru’s arm to shake her, only to make her head fall back in the chair. She was breathing heavily and rhythmically under her breath, her eyes shut close.  
“Oh, dear…”  
Michiru lightly slapped her cheeks to wake her up; no effect. Then she pulled her closest eyelid up with her thumb, seeing her pupil way up in the sclera, almost vanished.  
“Hotaru!” She yelled, feeling she should stay awake to listen to the rest of the upbraiding Michiru felt she had the right to deliver, not so much worried about Hotaru herself.  
When she saw Hotaru wasn’t awakening, she checked her pulse to be sure it was nothing serious, and then let her arm plummet back into the passenger’s seat.  
“Clever move, Hotaru. And you even managed to insult me by implying I put people to sleep, even when angry. You’ve earned my admiration.” She said to herself, since Hotaru clearly was too busy to listen.  
She calmly drove the sedan back on the road, headed all the way home this time, Hotaru not awaking once. When they arrived Michiru stepped out of the car, much calmer now, and opened the passenger’s seat. She gently shook Hotaru, whispering her name, and began to worry when it still produced no effect. She bended over to remove her seatbelt, and then placed her right arm over her neck. Slowly, and painfully, she raised her just below chest level, struggling not to tip over. She walked to the front door, every step feeling like a milestone in stamina and balance.  
She opened the front door, thankful that it wasn’t locked, and teetered to the lit living room where Haruka and Setsuna waited, each sitting on their own separate couch. Haruka wore a black coat over a white t-shirt and brown jeans, while Setsuna wore a soft white collared shirt and a black business skirt. When Haruka looked over to see Hotaru sleeping over Michiru’s arms, she raised her hands in frustration and made a displeased face. Michiru only looked her way indifferently, still struggling.  
“She’s asleep!?” Haruka asked crudely.  
“I don’t know. What do you think?” Last she checked, Michiru still despised stupid questions.  
Haruka stood up from her seat, and walked towards the two newcomers.  
“We waited all this time just to spill the beans on her, preparing for the worst. First she disappears, now this!”  
Michiru was starting to feel irritated at Haruka’s peevishness.  
“Then I guess we’ll just have to postpone it, won’t we?”  
“No way! I’m tired of this! Just wake her up!”  
Haruka approached them further, already stretching her arm to shake Hotaru vigorously. But she quickly halted upon feeling Michiru’s ice piercing eyes on her, and recoiled her arm when she unwisely faced them with her own, browbeaten.  
“We’ll. Try. Again. Later.”  
“F-fine.”  
“Good! Very thoughtful of you.” Michiru hurried to offer Hotaru over to Haruka, using the last strength reserve she had to raise Hotaru a bit more and thrust her just under Haruka’s chest, who was surprised into quickly grabbing a hold of her “Now please hold her for me; my back is killing me.”  
Michiru put her hand over her shoulder and rubbed it, throwing her head back, making a tired face and sighing. ‘Yes, Haruka, I would like a shoulder rub very much, thank you’ She thought to herself, disappointed her partner couldn’t read her cue.  
“…And take her upstairs to her room while you’re at it. Don’t forget to cover her with a blanket.”  
Michiru walked past Haruka, and rubbing her eyebrows addressed Setsuna:  
“Setsuna, dear, could you make us some tea?”  
Setsuna quickly got to her feet the minute she heard her name, and bowed her compliance. For her part, Haruka looked bitterly at Hotaru’s sleeping face, her mouth slightly opened. She turned around to do as she was told, headed for the staircase. Setsuna stared at Hotaru as she was carried upstairs; turning her head to keep up with her until she finally disappeared into the upper floor.  
“What? What is it, Setsuna?” Michiru asked, her eyebrow raised.  
“Nothing…” Setsuna turned her head to face Michiru “What tea flavor will you have this time? Green, or Oolong?”  
Michiru felt uneasy; it wasn’t like Setsuna to keep secrets from her.  
“You decide. Since you seem to know so much.”

***  
“I wish I understood!”

Hotaru could see a silhouette in the distance, headed towards a bright background. Everything was blurred and undefined, but she concentrated and started to make out who the figure was. She eventually realized it was wearing a wine colored dress and coat and a scarf. Hotaru’s senses were alert, and she was overrun with emotion.  
“Mama!”  
Hotaru ran towards the figure, and quickly hugged it from behind.  
“I missed you! I missed you so much, mama!  
She was shocked, however, when the figure turned its head to reveal it was none other than Michiru.  
“I missed you too, darling!”  
Hotaru couldn’t remember what happened next, but she was walking down a dark corridor lined with funhouse mirrors who distorted her image. She wore a light blue robe, the hood pushed back, and carried a candle in her left hand. She walked as if in a daze, and eventually heard crying in one of the mirrors in the distance. When she reached it, she saw a reflection, the only one that wasn’t distorted, of herself prostrated on the ground, wearing an all-black dress she didn’t remember owning but that seemed familiar just the same. The reflection lifted its face to “look” at Hotaru, revealing an empty featureless face. It quickly stood up and pasted itself over the mirror’s glass, shaking it a bit, shouting nervously:  
“What’s going on!? Why can’t I remember who I am!?”  
Hotaru was startled and stepped back, resuming her way.  
“Wait! Don’t leave me!” the projection screamed desperately, knocking on the mirror’s glass before resuming its crying, now more intensified.  
At some point, Hotaru was thirsty and tired, and stopped to rest by a fountain she noticed was empty. She could’ve sworn it was a simple fountain, except the second time she looked inside it it seemed much deeper, almost a well, and Michiru’s handmirror was at the bottom of it.  
“An evil kappa has stolen the water of the well for himself.”  
Hotaru slowly turned her head to see who was talking: a younger version of herself, wearing a pink long sleeved shirt and a red tutu. This garb she remembered from her childhood. She tried to say something, but her mouth felt too dry, and she placed her hands around her neck in pain. Her younger self waited patiently with her hands behind her back, never turning her eyes away, and when Hotaru looked at her again she unfolded a piece of paper in front of her.  
“Look. This is what he looks like.”  
Hotaru squinted her eyes to make out what the drawing was: it certainly looked like it was made by a child, with nothing but simple strokes and colors. The “kappa” in question was a standing, green frog-man with its arms stretched to the right and with webbed hands on top of a straight light-brown line that seemed to represent sand. ‘And behind him a beach, maybe?’ Hotaru didn’t quite notice when she picked the piece of paper, but sure enough she was holding it in her hands.  
“When you reach the pond he dwells on, place one foot in the water and keep the other one on land.”  
The voice echoed in the darkness, the young girl gone. Still feeling terribly thirsty, Hotaru walked around the fountain-well and forward into the pitch dark nothing, her candle back in her hand. She soon could savor the whiff of water in the air, intensifying her thirst, and she quickened her pace. She reached a misty pond, the bright-blue waters emanating its own light. Hotaru noticed she was stepping on sand, and carefully descended the small slope into the lake’s margin. Her urge to just fall on her knees and taste the water down her throat was strong, but she resisted it, heeding the warning from before. She slowly placed her left foot in the water, it making a soft, low sound. Then another sound could be made out, the sound of bubbles bursting in the surface. It didn’t take long for Hotaru to pinpoint its source; just a few paces ahead of her. And just as immediately as Hotaru noticed the area the water around it scattered into the air, shaking the once calm lake everywhere. A grotesque, scaly and viscous humanoid figure with a beak for a mouth, a carapace on its back and squinted frog eyes appeared from the disturbance.  
“You got nerve to show your face around here! You should run before I kick your ass!” the creature growled, with a raspy, inhuman voice.  
“I’m not afraid of you.” Hotaru answered, her voice working again all of a sudden.  
“Insolent girl! I will drink your blood for such rudeness!” the creature slowly took steps towards the pond’s margin.  
Now Hotaru knew the old kappa folktale only too well, and could be done with this one if she so desired. But there was still something she knew she needed from him…  
“You speak of rudeness, but you broke decorum in the manner you addressed me.”  
The creature stopped short on its track, placing its webbed hand under its beak in thought.  
“You are right! I’m so sorry!” the creature half-bowed repeatedly in shame, spilling water from the cavity on its head “Please don’t tell anyone! I would become the laughing stock of my family!”  
“In that case, return the water of the well and I won’t tell anyone.”  
“Ah, clever girl. That water is so fresh and invigorating, I want it for myself.” The creature seemed to somehow smile with its beak “What makes you think I won’t just kill you and keep my secret?”  
“In that case, I challenge you to a match of etiquette! Whoever observes all proper rules wins. And If I win you’ll have to hand me the water of the well.”  
“ Oh, ho ho. You don’t know what you’re getting into, young lady. Kappa are universally known for being the most mannered beings on all the earth! There is no way I will lose.”  
“Then you won’t mind if I pick the setting.”  
“I have nothing to fear from you! Pick your poison; I will teach you a lesson with it.”  
Hotaru chose tea drinking. They were both suddenly in a girl’s room looking at each other from their ends of a small sophisticated table containing all the proper tea apparel. The creature sure did a fine job of observing the rules: folding and placing the napkin on his lap, never on the table; never holding the teacup anywhere other than through the handle; never clanking the spoon or leaving it upright in the cup, or placing it in the saucer; cutting a thin lemon slice and placing it in the cup only after the tea was poured… It even went as far as to stand up and politely offer its adversary a cup of sugar or milk, after it was done pouring Hotaru’s cup. The creature seemed to smile to itself again as it touched the index finger with the thumb over the handle, appreciating the tea’s scent along with Hotaru, and then ready to finally sip it. Only to realize that its long beak couldn’t actually fit into the tiny cup properly. Turning the cup over would only spill everything, so the creature tried hanging his head and raising the cup just over his beak. It managed to obtain limited success as a bit of tea went down his throat, but a lot of it spilled over the sides of his beak and into his chest or into the table’s edge.  
“Oh, my…” exclaimed Hotaru, placing her hand over her cheek, being the one smiling now.  
“It’s not fair! It’s not my fault that humans make their tools all wrong!”  
“You may be cultured, but in the end you’ll always be kappa.”  
“Uncouth girl, so typical of a fool like you to judge things by their appearance.”  
“Regardless, give me the water you stole from the well now.”  
“Steal? I only took what was unclaimed. I remember when the water in that well was overflowing everywhere, going to waste. Why, is that your well? You should thank me then for holding all that water for you.”  
“You bore me; tell me where the water is!”  
“It’s in the tea jar; we’ve been drinking from it all this time! It was so refreshing, don’t you think?” The creature smiled again, in a perverted way.  
Hotaru was furious, but she kept her composure and stood up from the table, ready to rid herself of this nuisance.  
“Thank you very much then, Kappa-san, for giving back what’s mine so thoughtfully.” And she bowed deeply, almost hitting her forehead in the table.  
The kappa was obliged to do the same now, and it timely did. And so the water from the plate in his head fully spilled over the table and the ground, rendering him immovable. Hotaru approached the creature, and to make sure it wouldn’t cause any more trouble raised a black rod with a sharp, cutting steel at its tip over her head, about to strike it down.  
“You have no appreciation of all I did for you, you still view me as a monster, don’t you? Like I said, you can’t see beyond the surface.” The creature said, still stuck in its bowing position.  
Though Hotaru didn’t quite understand what he was talking about it still spoke to her somehow, and she lowered her scythe. Soon the creature, the room, the seats and the table and all the utensils turned into pastel crayon drawings. Except the tea jar which now didn’t look like a tea jar at all. Rather more like a large pearly-white ceramic vase being just over half-filled with water. Hotaru took it with her through the crayon door and back into the well. Staring down on it, she didn’t seem to feel it noteworthy that she was holding the hand mirror in her chest now. She tipped the vase over the wheel, water pouring endlessly and rapidly from it, making the sound of running water in the ambience. Soon the well was almost full, the water rippling with waves that shone with sunray.  
“You! My spirit has been so dry, but you’ve given it life again! Thank you... I shall grant you a wish.”  
“Who am I?”  
“Look into the water, into my eyes… your eyes.”

***

“Guarded by Saturn, the planet of Silence, I’m the soldier of ruin and birth, Sailor Saturn.”  
Hotaru declared by the staircase, her hand resting by the support, looking down on the ground. The three ladies were sitting by the couches, their tea drinking interrupted. Michiru shook the cup she was holding a little.  
“So, you do remember…” she noted.  
Hotaru didn’t take her gaze off the ground.  
“Yes. That day, I…died. And it wasn’t the first time either.” She remembered the lab “accident” clearly now, how it took her mother’s life and how her father was shortly possessed afterwards. “I was saved by Sailor Moon, rescued and brought back to life with her heart crystal. A baby…” Hotaru looked at her open hands in front of her and then into the cherry tree picture on the desk. The three women looked at each other, not sure what to do or say. Then Hotaru continued:  
“How long ago was it?”  
Haruka and Setsuna looked at Michiru uneasily, as if she was the elected spokesperson for this, just when she felt she never needed more help than now.  
“…We did our best to forget it, but how do you… anyway, it was almost six years ago.”  
“But how is that possible?” Hotaru didn’t take her eyes away from the photo, not too surprised about what she heard.  
“We were hoping you’d tell us; you’re a mystery to us!” Michiru finally stretched to place the tea cup by the table “Hotaru, why don’t you come and sit next to us? We’ll have a little talk.”  
“I think I’ll stay here for now.” She turned her head to face Michiru, making her swallow hard.  
“We returned you to Professor Tomoe, feeling that was how it was supposed to be. For better or worse, we thought the matter was settled. Then a month or so later we received an urgent call from his clinic claiming that you had been swapped by a lookalike and asking us if we knew anything of your whereabouts. We were startled and rushed to the clinic to find you still there alright, only unexplainably older, as if you already were of one year of age. It took some work to close the lid on the commotion, but eventually key people were discredited, blood tests didn’t lie… And no one would claim a girl whose birth was twelve years earlier at the time to be a missing “baby”. Anyway, we knew then that that wouldn’t be the first time you’d be a pro… gather unwanted attention. We figured no one else but us could take you in and look after you without calling the local media. And we didn’t know what else would happen to you, what else would change about you, and we felt we had to keep a close watch… And indeed it wasn’t the last of it.”  
Michiru took a pause, wiping her forehead.  
“Hotaru, please come and sit down. Having you stand there is making me nervous.”  
Hotaru hesitated, but soon conceded and slowly walked towards the couch opposite Michiru. She sat on the opposite end from Haruka, not even looking her way.  
“So, all of a sudden we had to take care of you, and that in itself wasn’t so hard. Except we never knew what to expect. We fed you, changed your diapers, put you to sleep… It was lovely really. Then by the end of the second month your body took another leap and just like that it was as if you were already three.”  
Michiru took another pause, looking down on her crossed arms. Growing to like Hotaru had been a process too. She had lost sleep many times during that year, night after night wondering when the next change was going to be, if it was going to be that very same night, and if in the next one something would go terribly wrong. They made sure Hotaru always slept clothesless so she wouldn’t get hurt when it happened, never left the house so as to not have neighbors and onlookers raise questions, and very much centered their lives around her.  
“You were so precocious too. We home schooled you then, and you always learned everything so fast and so well. You could speak so well you’d probably have no problem reading a play. In fact, reading was a thing you always did a lot…” Michiru sidetracked a bit. “But sometimes when you looked like you were five, nine, or eleven you would behave like a little baby too. Wailing when you didn’t get things your way, making funny noises with your mouth, drifting from your obligations to take house objects on a trip… It was quite a process…” Michiru wouldn’t admit it, but at times it felt like a small nightmare trying to make her brain absorb so much. Haruka stared at Hotaru angrily by her side, remembering how she hated giving up her freedom to look after this little freak during those times “You were something of an empty hull then, very open to suggestions. Taking a keen interest in almost anything. But you never, ever questioned about what was happening you. You never found anything strange. You were happy. And made us happy. Eventually we let your friend Chibiusa step in too, to let you have some contact with the outside world. We took you on vacations to the remote countryside by the beach you know so well…”  
Michiru inhaled deeply and layed her open hands on her lap.  
“And after a year or so of this routine you… I mean, your body finally stabilized for good, around when you looked just a bit younger than when you… left.” Michiru rubbed the back of her neck and continued “For a while we weren’t entirely sure that you’ve had stopped growing, but when we felt you were acting like a normal child your age we enrolled you back to school and back to societal life as if nothing had happened, for convenience sake. Your old birth certificate still claims you’re sixteen; no one erased it. But you look like you have the body of a fourteen… aging up works different for everyone, so it isn’t too conspicuous...”  
“You did pretty well at school, finding your way around the big city and looking after yourself for a girl that had just given up the pacifier. I suppose Chibiusa may have helped.” Michiru took a deep sigh, and threw her hands in the air “And it seemed everything would work out just fine after all. ‘And they lived happily ever after’. Until now…”  
Setsuna sipped her tea. Hotaru was quietly thinking to herself, remembering some of what she was told. It was far-fetched, but she didn’t have to rely on Michiru’s word; she knew that’s what happened now. So this was out of the way, but there was something much bigger she wanted to bring to light.  
“And then you told me I was in a coma in my early years. And that I had amnesia so I would never think about it”  
“Yes… What was I supposed to do? I… didn’t thought It’d do you any good to tell you of your troubled past. We just wanted you to have a normal life, like a normal girl in the end after all you’ve been through.”  
“Liar…” Hotaru was furious and Michiru was visibly startled by the accusation, even more so for being accurate. “Even after I know the truth you lie to my face.”  
Haruka interrupted:  
“Hotaru, you watch your tongue now. I don’t care how you feel, you’ll still show the people who raised you manners.”  
Hotaru only looked at Haruka with the side of her eyes, not answering her. Then she continued:  
“My father, he set out to do evil didn’t he?”  
“Not your father, the leech controlling him. Listen Hotaru, it’s all over now…”  
“And he set out to do that by way of me, isn’t that right?”  
Michiru knew Hotaru was maneuvering the conversation into a place she dreaded and always longed to forget. She desperately tried to think of a way to avoid this predicament.  
“Yes…Hotaru…”  
“And the three of you would never allow that to happen; it was your mission, right?”  
“Hotaru, stop it…”  
“Then say it to me! Don’t you dare hide it anymore!” Hotaru finally vented and tilted forward from her seat. The atmosphere had sullied further; Haruka had pulled Hotaru back into the couch by grabbing her shirt sleeve.  
“I told you to watch it!”  
Michiru quickly interceded for Hotaru, before this discussion stooped into savagery.  
“Haruka, let her go! It’s not her fault.”  
Haruka did so reluctantly, crossing her arms without taking her stare down away from Hotaru, who gazed at her equally vexed.  
“You want the truth, yes Hotaru? Very well…” Michiru really meant to say it, but she faltered still. “I…we…”  
Setsuna finally stepped in for Michiru, knowing she was having too much trouble.  
“Yes Hotaru, you were a tool of destruction. We all meant to… remove you.”  
Hotaru looked at Setsuna, her gaze twisted in anger. Then she looked at Michiru, tightening her fist, hating her most. Michiru couldn’t raise her head to meet her daughter’s eyes; it was probably best that way. Hotaru already knew they once tried to kill her, but ripping a confession out of them deepened her resentment to its last level.  
“Now don’t look at your mother like that, Hotaru. We all agreed on this.” Setsuna interrupted once more.  
“Murderers…”  
Michiru quickly raised her head to protest. “Now Hotaru, you watch your mouth! Don’t go saying something you can’t take back! You don’t understand what it was like to have the whole world on our shoulders!”  
“You say you “all” meant to kill me” Hotaru emphasized the “kill” word especially, bitterly correcting Setsuna “But Sailor Moon saved me in the end, she was the one who stopped you from getting your wish.”  
“She may have saved you, but what she did was reckless, and out of dumb emotions. She layed the world on a balance and we all didn’t die by a fluke! Don’t forget that!” Haruka added.  
Hotaru thought for a moment, looking away from Haruka, then asked:  
“Would you try it again?”  
Michiru hastened to answer:  
“Hotaru, we were under pressure. A lot of it. And we were stupid.” She glanced at Haruka, who didn’t like it “And we didn’t know you. It tore us apart then and…”  
“…Yes” Haruka interrupted.  
Michiru looked at Haruka in disbelief at her blatant insubordination; Hotaru looked at her in barely contained anger.  
“What do you want me to say, kid? You were a danger to life as we know it. Pity that your father had to invite death with his experiment. But he did, and it was up to us to clean after his mess. We all suffered and had to go through terrible sacrifices and battles while you were just waiting around for the time to bring doom on everyone. Your life weighted little against the whole damn world itself!”  
That was a different time!” Michiru interrupted “Hotaru, you have my word, that I’ll never raise my hand against you again. No matter what happens.”  
Hotaru dropped her head and was pensive again, her whole body shaking. Everyone was looking at her, waiting for her reaction. Then Michiru placed her eyes on Haruka who looked back and saw her furious, reproving glare. And for the first time in her life Haruka returned the look. Michiru looked away and decided to try and finish this once and for all:  
“So now you know, Hotaru.” she didn’t answer though, still thinking. Michiru took a deep breath and continued “Everything I did, I did for you. What matters now is you’re safe. The world is safe. You’re a healthy young girl with the future ahead of you.” Michiru waited a little and then rubbed both her eyebrows, already so tired from this short, yet draining experience.  
“Can we just… go to sleep now? There’ll be plenty of more days to sort this out. And better hours to do it as well.”  
“You’re a hypocrite…”  
Michiru removed her hands from her dazed face “What, Hotaru?”  
“A hypocrite!” she raised her face, tears in her eyes  
Michiru frowned, and retorted:  
“Oh… so what? Are you going to be mad at us forever now? You live with us, you know.”  
“How dare you take me in after meaning to kill me! How dare you feed me, put me to sleep, dress me and walk me around! And how dare you tell me what I should, or should not make of this!”  
Michiru stood up. “Hotaru, I don’t need this! Do you have any idea how many times I’ve seen you trot down a field, or run along with your friend, or hug Haruka or Setsuna, and thought about how I was almost responsible for never letting that happen… you happen!?” Michiru started to tear up as well “Believe me I thought a lot about it! And now more than ever!”  
“But you never gave me the right to think about it!” Hotaru stood up as well “You tried to kill me, then treated me like your property! And to add insult to injury, you built a world of lies around me to keep things your way! You all did!” she turned to face Haruka and Setsuna, the former not losing her frown and the latter closing her eyes and lowering her head “Oh, the insult! I’ve never felt so used, so stupid in my whole life!” she covered her face with her hands and poured tears, sobbing hard. “Shame on you! Shame on all of you! I curse every happy moment we’ve had together!”  
And she turned around and ran upstairs, weeping like a little girl. Michiru put her hands on her mouth to contain a strong sob, but quickly regained control. Haruka was upset as well, but for different reasons. She slowly got up from the couch, and Michiru soon approached and pushed her, making her alert.  
“What is wrong with you?”  
Haruka straightened herself and said her piece:  
“What!? You said this was meant to be a “time of truth”.”  
“Moron! Sometimes I wonder why I still keep you!”  
Haruka was provoked easily by this, as expected of her.  
“You know something, Michiru? Why don’t you take the blame for a change!?”  
Michiru was coming up with a reply, when she noticed Setsuna standing next to them.  
“I think we all had enough commotion for one day.” She said.  
Michiru and Haruka looked silently at each other, and Haruka left first for her room. Michiru hugged herself again, and feeling rather disconnected asked:  
“Ready for the aftershock, Setsuna?”  
Setsuna looked at her and retorted:  
“I’m not the one in the front seat, Michiru.”

***

Hotaru walked about in a garden located in a clearing in the middle of the forest. It was the dead of night, and she wore an all-white dress. She seemed to be the only one there, but still she felt like she wasn’t entirely alone, having brief glimpses of a woman eyeing her. She was rather disappointed that at some point the garden seemed filed with corpse flowers, their rotten stench permeating the air. She finally saw in relief yellow tulips in a flower fence and approached them. Reaching out to touch one with her index finger, the tulip bit her. Hotaru pulled back her finger and held it in front of her, seeing the blood coming out. Her dress had become red; she was shocked and felt dizzy.  
“The poison of the flower will soon work on you.”  
Hotaru saw the woman who addressed her: a tall, pale red headed woman wearing a black dress piece, an evil intent in her stare. She looked familiar and somehow Hotaru knew she was a witch.  
“You are under my spell now.”  
Hotaru fell to the ground on her knees, and noticed this time she was wearing a strange circus outfit, with ruffles around the neck and slashed stockings.  
She woke up, her head spinning and her eyes unfocused. She felt wet, and soon noticed she was in the bathtub. Haruka quickly opened the door and stepped inside, approaching Hotaru rapidly and placing her face right in front of Hotaru’s, a vicious grin on her face.  
“Yes, Hotaru! I would do it again!”  
Hotaru closed her eyes and placed her hands over her head, shaking it.  
“No! Go away! I don’t want this dream again!” and she began to cry. She opened her eyes and saw the face of a lean, pale woman with black lipstick, and a long, long hair that stretched all around Hotaru. Her dark eyes’ lifeless pupils flashed a strange dark-purple color wildly.  
“You are me and I am you. You are mine! I own you!” she placed her hand in the middle of Hotaru’s chest and pushed it through her skin and ribs all the way to her heart, bringing a world of pain to Hotaru, who gripped this woman’s arms and tried pushing her away. Hotaru quickly felt breathless, and as if crushed all around by a compacter, a burning pain in her chest.  
“Remember this? Nothing gives me more pleasure than causing you misery. My Master wants to see you suffer as well, for what you did to him; I came here just to fetch you. Now, let’s not keep him waiting, right Hotaru?” And she let out a vicious, maniacal laugh.  
Hotaru was shaking and struggling everywhere, drooling and spilling the water around, but the woman on top of her inside the tub wouldn’t budge. The two eventually met eyes again, and Hotaru saw the laughing woman’s eyes were red, with cat like pupils.  
“You wanted to see? Then see!” The woman said.  
She was slowly transported into the eyes, into a circular passageway of meat where she kept falling sideways through it, the environment permeated with a hostile red. At the end of it she could still see the woman’s eye, huge and covering all of the other side. And she covered her face with her arms, too terrified to look at it.  
Then a sudden strong gush of wind blew in front of her, and she was dangling in the air. She felt like she was falling, yet she didn’t seem to move. She did the mistake of opening her eyes a second time, and saw it. A dark mass a thousand times her size, protruding and extracting several parts of its “body” simultaneously like a mollusk. Oozing a black liquid every time it contracted and expanded like the beat of a heart. It suddenly jolted tentacles from its sides, resembling a black star. And a big opening started to develop in its center, a strong vivid purple light coming out of it. Hotaru felt like she was approaching that light, and the closer she got the more she could make out what seemed like many gaping jaws opening and closing their mouths in anticipation of what was coming to them.  
“No! Somebody! Help me! Please, somebody!”  
She was suddenly running in the dark. She could make out two figures in the distance, somehow placed above and diagonally from where she was. Among other accessories, they wore strange leotards with skirts on them. As she ran in their direction they slowly adjusted to a straight angle in relation to her.  
“Haruka! Michiru! Help me! Help…”  
She was slashed in the throat by Haruka’s ornamented knife, blood rapidly dropping from her neck as she vainly tried to contain it with her hands. She put her bloodied hand in front of her face, staring at it in shock.  
“…me…”  
She fell to her knees, then face first to the ground before the rest of her body slowly slided into a large pool of her own blood. She couldn’t see anything anymore besides her arm stretched over it. Out in the distance she could hear the sound of fireworks exploding, and though she couldn’t see them their light flickered over her eyes. She finally felt a languid peace, no longer scared or in pain.  
“…Thank you…thank you…”

***

Morning had broken, and the first rays of light shone through the large hospital room window. Michiru sat by the bed; her hair a mess even by commoner standards, and she had a terrible wearied and wrinkled face. Haruka had stopped by many times, offering to take turns or coffee, which Michiru always denied - especially the hospital coffee. Instead she was bent on staying, too traumatized to leave Hotaru alone for a split second. She held on to her braceleted hand by the bed; she was in deep sleep, breathing through the medical ventilator, its sound and that of the cardiac monitor hypnotic. Haruka was outside, leaning on the room’s glass window, still reviewing everything that happened last night:  
Michiru had hesitated by Hotaru’s bedroom door when she was headed for her own room. She placed her hand over the knob, then reproached herself for being a sentimental fool and was about to resume her walk. It was then that she heard a thud coming from inside. She thought it strange and lightly knocked on the door.  
“Hotaru, are you alright over there? …If you are just tell me to go away…” she knocked on the door again “Please, Hotaru, I need to know!”  
And still no answer. Then a thought crossed Michiru’s mind: what if Hotaru wanted to end her torment the hard, permanent way? She tried turning the knob, but Hotaru had locked the door.  
“Hotaru, open up! This is no time to be giving me the cold shoulder; answer me!” she turned the knob a few more times “Hotaru…! Haruka! Haruka, wake up! Come help me over here!”  
Haruka shortly opened her room’s door and peaked at Michiru’s direction in a daze, just getting her hair out of the way and the belt around her jeans. She quickly trotted towards Hotaru’s door and knocked it in full strength.  
“Hotaru, open this door right now or I’ll force it open…! Stand back, Michiru.”  
Haruka took a few steps back, and in a sudden thrust stroke the door with her elbow and opened it at once in a loud bang. She turned the light switch on, and saw the terrifying image of Hotaru tangled in the sheets on the ground. Twisting and shaking and stretching her arms and legs about as if possessed and drooling from her mouth, her eyes looking as if they were about to jut out of their sockets so wide open they were. The most terrifying part, however, was when she stopped struggling all of a sudden. Michiru put her hands over her mouth, barely containing her shriek.  
“…What is this!? Hotaru, what have you done!?” Haruka yelled, and shortly turned around to Michiru “Michi, quick! Call an ambulance!”  
But Michiru stood there, dumbstruck. She just slowly shook her head, trembling.  
“Goddamit!” She thrusted back into the hallway and into the staircase, almost pushing Michiru along with her “Setsunaaa! Wake up! Hotaru is dying! Call an ambulance! Now! Setsunaaa!”  
Only when she saw Setsuna’s room door open and she coming out in a hurry in her robes and with loose hair did she rush back to Hotaru’s room. Michiru leaned all of her body and arms on the broken door, shaking and feeling like she was on the last, deepest circle of hell. Haruka raced past her, yelling:  
“It’s not over yet, Michi! There’s still time!”  
She kneed by Hotaru’s face, cursing the sheet for being in the way as she pulled it down just over waist level. She put her index and thumb under her cheek and tilted her face in both directions, and with her other hand’s thumb stretched her eyelid. It seemed that everything that could go wrong did: her pupil had gone all the way up, and her chest wasn’t rising nor dropping.  
“S-she stopped breathing, Michiru! This doesn’t make… did she have any pills in her room? Michiru!”  
She gave up asking Michiru anything when she turned back to see she was still catatonic. She turned back to Hotaru and wiped the spit out of her mouth. She began to perform CPR, first pushing and letting go of her chest a couple of times, and then closing her nose and opening her mouth to breath in, making sure her tongue wasn’t rolled back into her throat. She quickly noticed that breathing air into her lungs wasn’t making her chest rise.  
“Her…her throat is clogged! I don’t know if it’s muscle or blood… or anything else!”  
Just then Setsuna appeared, holding the long range phone in her ear.  
“Haruka, tell me what happened!”  
“I…I think she had a heart attack! She stopped breathing! She’ll never make it to the hospital at this rate! Oh shoot, give me that!”  
Haruka grabbed the phone from Setsuna’s hand and quickly explained the situation. She told she had already done CPR and how her throat was obstructed, and then listened some more before finally dropping her arm and the phone with it at waist level.  
“Well!?” Setsuna asked nervously.  
“They just said to keep her on a sitting position and that they’re coming as fast as they can. They may as well bring the death certificate with them…” Haruka answered, an eerie apathy taking over her.  
“Idiot! Don’t say such nonsense!” Setsuna yelled in a rare outburst. She grabbed the phone from Haruka’s hand to keep the line of communication flowing.  
“Yes, yes, keep her in a sitting position you said. Anything else?”  
Haruka moved towards Hotaru again and lifted her in her arms, pulling the blanket aside, and dashed for the door with her. Michiru suddenly snapped out of her trance, seeing what Haruka was doing.  
“Haruka! Where do you think you’re…” and she tried to step in her way.  
“Out of the way, Michi!” Haruka just pushed Michiru back, making her back crash into the broken door, hurting her a little “We’re out of time!” She rushed downstairs.  
Michiru stood still for a while, having trouble enduring the pain. Setsuna came to her aid, placing one hand in her back and holding her hand with the other, and helped her in following Haruka downstairs. When they reached downstairs, Hotaru was in the kitchen ground and Haruka was trying to open a plastic bag of straws. When she did she grabbed just one; the rest fell and rolled around all over the ground. Then she picked a paper-cutting knife from her pocket.  
“Haruka, by all that is precious, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING!” Michiru yelled.  
“She needs to breath! Nothing else matters! If she doesn’t it’s a lost cause!” She stuck out the blade’s knife “Please don’t interrupt; it’s hard enough.”  
Haruka went on and began to cut Hotaru’s neck skin, just over her chest. Blood quickly leaked from the new orifice and into the ground at first, then when Haruka increased the size of the cavity further the blood started to spurt out as well, making a crimson mess of the ground under Hotaru’s head. Michiru placed her hands on the sides of her brow in sheer panic, shaking, and Setsuna quickly turned her around so she would not look. For her part, Setsuna was sweating and kept her head down, breathing heavily.  
When Haruka felt the hole was big enough, she placed the straw in it. The blood that was gushing about was restrained into going up the straw, and Haruka quickly and methodically sucked and spat it on the floor. She repeated this process a good eight times.  
Then, a raspy and desperately loud hissing sound could be heard, and Hotaru’s body twitched and her chest slowly began to rise and descend as it should. Her breathing slowly settled for a calmer rhythm.  
“Michiru, look! She’s breathing!” Haruka said wide eyed; she shortly began to laugh manically. Michiru and Setsuna had already turned when they heard that blessed hissing; first Setsuna, then Michiru, who was having trouble taking anything, as she saw her. Hotaru was safe, for the moment.  
They lay down next to her on their knees, Michiru wanting to hug her but too afraid it might complicate her condition, and Setsuna still too confused about everything – she had forgotten to keep contact with the emergency service. Haruka placed her hand on Hotaru’s brow, pushing her hair away; her face just above hers.  
“That’s right, girl: breathe! Help is coming.”  
Haruka looked at Hotaru’s open-mouthed face for a while before finally falling back on her behind. She exhaled a quiet long breath and looked at her two sobbing partners. Now that the tension had finally given in a bit, she was tearing a little too. She placed her left hand, the one that wasn’t stained with blood, over her face, gently sliding it down her cheek.  
The ambulance arrived nine minutes later after the call was made, the sirens announcing its coming. The paramedics came in with the stretcher, and were surprised to see what had transpired. Nevertheless, they quickly moved Hotaru up the stretcher and into the ambulance, checking her condition and removing the straw to place the trach tube in its wake. Once Hotaru’s stretcher was placed inside and all the paramedics were assessing her, Michiru quickly stepped inside the ambulance’s back door, and Haruka followed her right after she finished telling Setsuna to bring all the documents to the hospital. The ambulance sped away into the night, the sirens blasting.  
When they arrived at the hospital, the paramedics rushed ahead with Hotaru and Michiru had to be held back by security so as to not follow her. Haruka held her coming from behind, reminding her of the long bureaucratic process they would have to go through. She didn’t budge at first, and it took some manner of rhetoric to calm her amidst all the screaming. After the usual query and paperwork filling - Michiru pointing out that money was not a problem, even though she had a health plan - they waited by the reception, with Michiru absolutely refusing to sit down, walking from one side to the other, grating on Haruka’s nerve. After about a half hour the doctor in charge appeared, and Michiru instantly jumped on him for answers.  
He told them that Hotaru’s condition was stabilized, that she was on anesthetics and that an angiogram revealed several of her coronary arteries had tightened, which was a very rare occurrence in someone as young as Hotaru, unheard of even. He was curious about Hotaru’s past medical record, her condition that “miraculously” disappeared years ago and why they didn’t keep any heart medication home given her history. Michiru was not interested in this same old round of questions again, and fiercely told the doctor that if their kind - who knew all secrets between heaven and earth - couldn’t figure it out, how was she supposed to. Haruka intervened, trying to avoid the enmity of the man who could help them. Noticing her, he mentioned the “procedure” she made on Hotaru and scolded her for such a rash, unwarranted reaction. Michiru was about to stand up to him, but Haruka only pushed her back. In the end however he did praise her as well, saying that what she did helped keep the oxygen flowing to her brain and prevented anything “too serious” from happening.  
“Enough of this chit-chat!” Michiru protested, stepping in front of Haruka again “Get back to Hotaru; what are you and your team going to do next!?”  
“Yes well,” he adjusted his glasses “as her legal guardians we need you to sign these papers for her angioplasty. It should be an entirely regular, safe operation performed by our experienced surgeons, as usual. Your daughter is in good hands now.”  
“I’m sure she is,” Haruka responded, trying to keep Michiru from having a chance at answering any further. She picked up the clipboard and the pen the doctor immediately handed her. She read briefly, looking over the papers calmly and finally signed her name in it. She knew it was a rather bold move coming from her; she could feel Michiru’s stare. She handed the clipboard to the doctor, who added:  
“The question remains whether or not this will be a recurring symptom, of course. It shouldn’t be in ideal circumstances. But given that your daughter is a biological mystery, we should stay alert.”  
Michiru frowned at the man, hating his sass very much.  
“Can you take us to her?” Haruka questioned.  
“You will have to wait by the corridor as we finish preparing the surgery room.You will have to give us your guarantee you won’t raise a commotion, however, especially when we get to move her.”  
Haruka looked back at Michiru, gauging whether she would give an indignant reply. It seemed she was playing along now, which only frightened Haruka more as she knew it meant trouble for her later on. She promised:  
“We won’t.”  
“Then follow me please”  
The doctor went down the corridor, Haruka and Michiru staying behind for a few seconds.  
“Michiru… you of all people should know how to butter up others to get what you need out of them.”  
“Shut up, Haruka.”

***

They were escorted back to the ICU wing and to a smaller corridor. Soon Hotaru was moved out of a room by a small team of medics and nurses in blue gowns. Besides the ventilator she also wore a hair protector and a serum tube in her arm. And next to her were a cardiac monitor, a defibrillator and an assortment of medical apparels surrounding her stretcher. Michiru didn’t even notice when she leaned on Haruka, prompting her to hold her hand and shoulder. Haruka timely placed her hand on Michiru’s back and pushed her along to follow Hotaru as she was transported down the corridor and eventually taken inside a double door.  
They could do nothing now but sit down and wait for the surgery’s outcome, signaled by the red light over the double door going out. Haruka tried cuddling a downhearted Michiru in her arms, only to be pushed back. She wasn’t feeling circumspect right now however – being especially tired of the “warm and cold” game - and she tried again with a little more force to Michiru’s surprise. Caught diagonally in her lover’s arms and not too comfortable, Michiru sighed and gave in, eventually settling herself over Haruka’s lap. Haruka gently slided her hand over her partner’s silhouette and played a little with her hair.  
The clacking of a heel on the floor could be heard coming from the corridor, and a nurse holding a clipboard appeared and the double door suddenly opened, a rather young looking surgeon coming out. Haruka had to hold Michiru again as she thrusted back into a sitting position.  
“Michi, these operations are standard procedure. I’m sure everything is going fine…”  
Michiru silently nodded, looking away. But she didn’t really care to believe a word of what Haruka said. The surgeon looked at the couple briefly before turning to face the nurse and pulling his surgical mask down to mumble something to her, who took notes. The only thing that kept Michiru from standing up and demanding an immediate answer was her fear of bad news. Meanwhile Haruka was getting worried; she was expecting him to just come up to them quickly, stick a thumb up and say “She’s fine!” He sent the nurse on her way, looked at the couple again and started approaching them. They exchanged glares and Michiru quickly grabbed her partner’s hand to press it. They looked up at him when he arrived.  
“Well!?” Haruka asked ahead.  
“Excuse me,” he bowed slightly “I’m Hideaki Noa, head surgeon… She’s stable for the moment. As you know your daughter had a case of coronary spasm… in multiple arteries. Very unusual. On top of that, it seems she has caught a virus infection that’s given her an alarming high fever of forty two degrees Celsius. Her state is… critical.”  
“What!?” Michiru bellowed “Do you have anything to do with this? I thought you were supposed to know what you were doing!” she remarked coldly.  
“Please…” he motioned his hands to calm her down “We took every precaution possible. We sterilized and disinfected everything as per procedure. The most natural explanation is that her body’s defenses weakened when she had the seizure, leaving her vulnerable for outer agents. Did you sterilize the knife you used to cut her just over the first rib?”  
“Huh?” Haruka was taken by surprise “No, I… I was nervous…”  
“Just as well,” Hideaki interrupted “it could have been anything else. But due to this surprise fever we have to be extra careful; we can’t expect her to recover as well as she would if the circumstances were normal. She is very much undergoing a double treatment now.”  
Michiru leaned forward from her seat, placing her hands around her lower face. Haruka observed her, and though she wouldn’t admit it she was more worried about what Hotaru’s death would do to Michiru than Hotaru herself. Doctor Hideaki noticed Michiru’s concern as well, and tried comforting her:  
“Kaiou-san, no one in our staff, myself included, likes losing young patients like your daughter. We’re pouring all our energy into her.”  
“Yes, thank you…” she stood up “Please, do everything in your power.” And she bowed to him, which immediately prompted Haruka into doing the same.  
He nodded, and excused himself back into the surgery room. Throughout the hours a number of medical staff walked in and out, sometimes discussing something by the door, briefly looking at the sitting couple at the other side. At one point doctor Hideaki came outside again and walked straight through the corridor, coming back another pair of doctors. Michiru was alert at all times, taking interest in any new event that happened, even though she could make very little out of them. Haruka, not so much. She was dozing off contantly, having not slept that night. Michiru would often wake her up whenever something was up by the surgery’s room door, mumbling to herself at what could be happening each time.  
Staying awake eventually became too much for her however. And she hung her head down.  
And she dreamed.  
She dreamed she was a in a barren land of red hills, the sky above her dark and looming. She was dressed in dirty gray rags - holes slashed open in some parts of her shoulders, legs and midriffs – and barefooted.  
“Michiru! Setsuna!” Her voice echoed over the hills “Where is everybody?”  
The wind howled over the hills, and there was a grating sound in the distance like metal on metal. To Haruka it almost sounded like the shriek of a young woman. With no choice but to scout ahead, Haruka began climbing the hill in front of her, sliding down every turn at the slippery slope.  
‘It’s as hot as hell in here…’ she thought, holding on to the dirt she was lying over.  
She made it to the top at one point, though she couldn’t quite trace back how she did it. She saw a strange, orange-red glow coming from an adjacent slope. A weird munch? noise coming from its direction. Exhausted, Haruka staggered to the edge, the munching sound becoming louder and louder. But before she could get too close a huge figure emerged from it, ten times Haruka’s size and length. Taking a good look at it, Haruka saw it was a terrible oni: his face had an inhuman smile that stretched too far past its cheeks, a smile that was filled with canine teeth the size of Haruka; and his skin was red, but a darker tone could be seen bleeding out through the many pores in his body, pores that seemed rotten and filled with pus.  
The demon seemed to be holding a victim between his hands, stretching it as it feasted on its stomach, sucking its intestine like pasta. Once it was through with its meal, he tossed it in Haruka’s direction, the mutilated body falling to the ground just a pace away from Haruka. She was horrified when she recognized her face in that body, and it didn’t help when her doppelganger’s eyes suddenly blinked and fixed its gaze in her direction. The demon suddenly stopped chewing, and very slowly turned his head to look at Haruka. His huge bulky eyes seemed confused at first, but soon expressed delight as if to say ‘the more the merrier’. Haruka was intuitively taking steps backwards, and didn’t notice when her foot stepped into nothing and had her rolling down the slope she just climbed. When she reached the bottom she was in pain, but she could still hear the oni’s grunt as he approached and soon her fear made her ignore any pain she felt. She limped all the way way to the other side of the hole?, desperately trying to climb it as she clawed her way through the sand and the oni approached her more and more. She began to pant and whimp in desperation as her faith seemed to approach her, and in the last minute, just as the beast was about to close its jaw on her she managed to jump up and pull her legs up in the nick of time, letting out one final scream as she did so.  
She was on higher ground again, but it seemed to matter little given the size of what was chasing her. The oni stretched his arm to grab a hold of her, and Haruka was quickly forced into throwing herself into yet another slope for protection. She rolled downhill and hurt herself further, spewing sand and blood from her mouth. She began to cry, knowing that there was no way she was getting away at this pace. Still, simply surrendering to such a foul beast was unthinkable; the fear had taken over Haruka, and even if it was hopeless she would still run, and run, and run…  
She looked over her shoulders to see the demon looking down on her from the slope she just fell through, his hand over the edge. The hills were still eerily quiet, only the sound of the wind blowing; a sound that seemed like a moan.  
It was then that Haruka felt like she crashed on a stump. Something seemed to be holding her waist and not letting go: a sobbing young girl.  
“Haruuuka! *sob*”  
“Hotaru? What are you doing here!? Run! RUN!”  
“Noooooo!” Hotaru shook her head vigorously, the tears falling from her cheek, holding Haruka tight.  
Now Haruka felt her hell had intensified; she couldn’t bear having an innocent child like Hotaru facing the horrible fate she witnessed moments ago. She thought about picking her up and carrying her on her shoulders, but she was too hurt. Then she thought about throwing herself to the oni to give her time to run and hide, and maybe even placate his hunger. Whatever she was going to decide she had to be quick. She turned her head again to look at the demon.  
But… he was turning around. And shortly began to walk away.  
“Haruka!”  
“eiweeaath… What!?”  
Michiru was bending over in front of Haruka with a raised eyebrow, confused.  
“You’re soaked in sweat. Are you alright?”  
“I’m… where’s… Yeah.”  
“Hideaki-san said we may see Hotaru now. Let’s go!”  
It took a while for Haruka to recompose herself, but seeing Michiru leave without her gave her the stimulus to get herself up and going a little faster.  
They left for the isolated hospital room where Hotaru was staying, and were instructed to wear gowns, gloves and face masks before coming in to avoid worsening her high fever condition. Haruka stayed behind however, claiming she was fine and waiting by the sliding door.  
Michiru dressed everything and stepped inside first, followed by Hideaki-san. She stood next to Hotaru by the head of the bed, having mixed feelings about seeing her like this.  
“She should be able to breathe normally now; we will soon remove the trach tube from her throat. The clogging was a most unusual episode…” he crossed his arms and looked down, absorbing himself in the finer details of the surgery, “since her medical record said she didn’t have any allergies, we could only attribute it to hyperparathyroidism. Other muscles in her body stiffened up as well, even though, as you know, a heart attack’s “burn” isn’t supposed to spread further than your jaw and left arm… Your daughter was a cocktail of surprises to us. Was she under a lot of stress lately?”  
Michiru’s mind seemed to be elsewhere.  
“… I’m sorry… Do you want to be left alone?”  
“Yes… I mean, no…! Yes and no to each question… She was… very stressed, you could say.”  
“Hmm, and was she feeding well? One of the causes of hyperparathyroidism is the lack of vitamin D.”  
“To the best of my knowledge… Actually she was out all day, and I don’t know what she had between classes. I admit she may have been eating too little at home…”  
Dr. Hideaki looked away from Michiru, thinking to himself, and continued briefly:  
“It’s important for me to remind you that heart attacks leave scars that do not contract. And she had it in more than one artery; her heart’s pumping ability won’t be the same. If she led an active physical life I suggest you relax it. Proper feeding will be paramount to her recovery, as will resting. But, other than that, her heart is stabilized for the time being. Once we remove her trach tube we will give her a warm bath to try and lower her body temperature. Would you like to stay and watch?”  
“Yes, please.”  
“Very well, then. I will be back shortly.”  
He left the room through the sliding room, making Haruka step back to let him pass. She looked at him, then at Michiru who stayed inside. Michiru looked at a sleeping Hotaru surrounded by medical equipment.  
“You were so happy less than a month ago…” she said.

***

It didn’t take long before the medical staff figured Hotaru could be moved away to a more comfortable room, provided by Michiru’s top-class health insurance. Her temperature hadn’t improved that much, however, and she was still being monitored by both men and machine.  
Haruka was outside, leaning on the glass window. She looked over her shoulders to see Michiru doing the same thing she was doing about an hour ago; nothing. She sighed again and shook her head. ‘What is it with Michiru and that girl? Why does she care so much?’  
Michiru wore the same “casual” clothes from when she didn’t want to raise attention; the coat, the long skirt, and the red bow holding her luscious hair together. She lied on her knees by the floor and quietly fawned to baby Hotaru, who shook about happily and had stopped crying due to her antics. Haruka grew impatient by the door; she wore her long mustard coat over a white bottoned shirt and wine-colored pants. They were supposed to be leaving town, and their past, behind for good by then; the sun already setting over Haruka’s shoulders. And there lied Michiru instead, holding and playing with their past right in front of her. She had noticed how back in the hospital Michiru hesitated to leave Hotaru behind, looking over her as she left in Prof. Tomoe’s arms. She had to hold on to her, trying to encourage her to accept things as they were and to look forward to their new peaceful future together after all the struggle, their near deaths and the near end of the world they had faced.  
“Michiru, this is wrong. We can’t watch over the same child we sought to kill all this time.”  
“She doesn’t have anywhere to turn to, Haruka. She’s too “different”.” Michiru didn’t take her eyes off Hotaru as she shook her up and down between her hands.  
“No! Leave her to one of the other girls… leave her to Setsuna! It’s hard enough to look at myself in the mirror without… this!”  
Michiru ignored her, and held Hotaru in her arms, looking at her in delighted bemusement and using her index finger to grab her attention. Little Hotaru laughed adorably, and stretched her arms to catch her finger and suck [nib?] on it.  
“Michiru, are you even listening to me!?”  
“Ruka, stop shouting. You’ll upset her.” Michiru pulled her finger away from Hotaru and wiped the infant’s mouth with the sheet that was covering her.  
Haruka was furious at her dismissal, biting her bottom lip.  
“You think this is some sort of joke!? Look at me! I’m leaving, do you understand!?” Haruka wavered after the last sentence, not so sure she was willing to go through with what she was saying.  
Michiru quietly lowered Hotaru at lap level and, looking at the other side of the room with a calm countenance, conceded to Haruka’s protest:  
“Very well, you want an invigorating parley, yes?” she turned her head to look at Haruka in the eye. She wasn’t shaken however, and Michiru closed her eyes as she continued “Haruka, I’ve followed you all the way without question because I believed you were right. I followed you because I was scared, and I needed someone to share my burdens with; I felt like hell wouldn’t be such a bad place if you were there with me. I relied on you for support, and I felt you needed me as well. And not only me, but the whole world needed you strong and unflinching, and I did my best to see you through. But…” she opened her eyes “circumstances have changed. And I don’t need you telling me what to do anymore. There is no war now; all there’s left is a little girl who lost everything. And who needs proper tending…  
“Mama…”Michiru faced the little child in her arms again.  
“Oh look… Her first word. And so soon.” She added in a sad undertone. She turned back to Haruka.  
“Don’t you feel we owe her a second chance?”  
Haruka couldn’t believe the absurdity of what she heard. She hit the side of the door frame with the side of her closed fist in anger, holding back a grunt of frustration. She lowered her head as she tried to get a grip on her feelings.  
“I don’t feel I owe that kid anything! Don’t be ridiculous!” she bellowed.  
Hotaru began to whimper, and Michiru was becoming intoxicated by Haruka’s foul mood.  
“Oh, you’re willing to go to hell for murder, but not to share the same ceiling with your murderee?”  
“And you are!?” Haruka raised her head, red-faced “I went through hell and back because of her!”  
“I went through hell and back too.” Michiru noted dryly. Hotaru was finally coerced into wailing by all the commotion. Michiru dropped the discussion to coo her “Shh, shh. It’s alright. We’re only fighting, see? You’ll have a whole life to be scarred by this still.”  
Haruka saw she was put on hold, her feelings denied, and turned away from the two of them. Michiru looked her way again, cradling Hotaru gently in her arms. She felt she was handling two babies at the moment. But when she saw Haruka was shaking she wasn’t sure of what to expect of her.  
“I almost lost you… I still can’t get over it.”  
Michiru looked at Haruka tenderly, honestly sorry for her; it was easy to forget sometimes that she was human too.  
“Haruka, I…”  
Haruka suddenly got her act together, turned around and replied with cold resolution:  
“You’re right, Michiru: the mission is over. I thought we would finally find some shred of a normal life together. But you just have to go and ruin everything, don’t you? You’ve been strong all this time just to grow soft at the very end. Just to spit at the miracle that was the two of us finally having a destiny of our own!”  
Haruka looked at her partner’s face, searching for a reaction; Michiru’s expression was a mix of worry and condescension, like that of a mother seeing her child throwing her first heartbreak fit.  
“A miracle that this baby helped happen, in the end.” She said calmly.  
“If that’s how you want it, fine! If you want that child so much you can keep her. I don’t want to be ten feet near her. I’m leaving. I’ve done what you wanted me to do.” Haruka snorted and tears shortly slid down her cheeks. She tried to hide it in vain by wiping them on her sleeve. She turned around, holding on to the frame; she knew this was the first time Michiru caught her like this, and hated it.  
“You no longer need to “see me through” anything now. That’s what it really was, wasn’t it?” She let go of the frame and tightened her fists “Goodbye, Michiru.” She was about to step out the door to her new, barren life.  
“…Ruka”  
The voice was as soft as the ocean; an old muse calling to her in a familiar way she couldn’t –wouldn’t dare resist. She stopped short on her track, and had the saddest semblance on her face as she looked up to the sky and the gentle wind breeze shook her hair, struggling not to start shaking again. She slowly turned to face her caller. Michiru held Hotaru in her hands and stretched her in Haruka’s direction, teary eyed.  
“Look at her, Ruka. Look well. She’s our second chance too.”  
Haruka looked uneasily at baby Hotaru who looked back at her with a blank, confused look, before she brought the palm of her open hand to her mouth to chew and droll on it, holding it with the other hand. She suddenly threw her arms up and shook them, letting out a joyous high shriek laugh, shutting her eyes.  
“I don’t know how else to convey this to you. We are responsible. She needs people who understand her, people like her to raise her. It would mean so much to me if you backed up my belief in this.”  
‘And I don’t know how to convey this to you, Michi, but you’ve gone nuts!’ Haruka thought ‘Still, seeing you like this…’  
Michiru continued:  
“Don’t go where I can’t follow you… remember?”  
Haruka was jumpy, moving around the door frame; she was making one of the toughest decisions of her life. She hung her back by the frame and looked at Michiru, who was holding Hotaru in her arms again, caressing her. She was looking at Haruka with soft, sad eyes, waiting for her to make her decision.  
“You make me come off as the villain…”  
“I won’t judge you.”  
Haruka looked outside briefly, pensive. Then walked towards the sidewalk through the trimmed grass and stood near it. Michiru stood up, bringing Hotaru along, and stood by the door seeing a lonely Haruka stare at the day’s last rays of sunshine over the horizon. She knew enough of her lover to know that the way she was acting meant she was staying. Later that night, when they were alone and Hotaru was asleep, Michiru started pecking her cheeks. Haruka tried turning her face away at first, trying to show she was still angry but her petty resistance didn’t last long, especially after her companion threw her weight at her, pushing her to the wall. And so Michiru bedded her that night, just to be on the safe side. At least that’s what she thought she was doing; she may have been denying her feelings again.  
Haruka hung her head on the glass window.  
“Second chance… How novel.”

***

The clacking sound of heels could be heard coming from the corridor, and Haruka looked on to see Setsuna approaching with a long white plastic bag on her hand. She stopped in front of Haruka, holding the bag with both hands, serious as always.  
“Haruka-chan.”  
“Hi, Setsuna.”  
“How is she?”  
Haruka had to think a little to figure which one of the two inside she was referring to, then decided she probably meant the both of them.  
“Hotaru is stable, but caught a high fever. And Michiru is… been there for hours now. I think she’s fine, just still a little shook up… Did you bring the tea like I asked you?”  
“Yes.” She raised the white bag with one arm.  
“And did you clean that… mess from earlier?”  
“It was the first thing I did, before it stained the floor.”  
“Good. I don’t want Michiru having something to trigger her memory, not that she needs to.”  
The conversation died for a moment. Haruka adjusted herself by the window, shifting the weight on her legs. She looked at Setsuna in her pink business dress from head to toe, still immobile.  
“We’ll have to find an oven or any other heat source to boil the water for the tea…” Haruka tried small talking, which she always had trouble coming through with Setsuna and her stone cold gaze and attitude “Maybe we can ask the receptionists nicely, or bribe them as the case may be… Listen, Setsuna…”  
“Hmm?”  
“Thank you for taking care of Michiru for me. You know, in all the things I can’t relate to her. I know how… difficult she can be sometimes.”  
“Oh no, Haruka. Michiru’s given me much; she’s no trouble to me whatsoever.”  
“Oh, Michiru’s not a giver.”  
“Maybe you ought to get to know her again.” Setsuna answered dryly.  
“Right…”  
Haruka knew she had reached a new low whenever even Setsuna felt like scolding her, and dropped her head. But she soon raised it again to ask something.  
“Listen, do you think you can get Michiru to leave that room for a few minutes? She’s gotta eat and sleep at some point.”  
“I’ll try… if you make her tea in the meantime.” She raised the bag suggestively.  
“Oh, right.” Haruka rushed to grab it.  
Setsuna headed for the room’s door and opened it as quietly as she could, then after seeing Michiru gently knocked it with her fingers. Michiru hastily turned her head, wide eyed to see who it was, as if she had just woken from sleep. Recognizing her friend, she looked at Haruka by the window, and turned to Setsuna again to grace her with a welcoming smile. Setsuna smiled back and made her way inside, closing the door behind her. Haruka was miffed at the way Michiru received her friend; it was quite the contrast to the treatment she received from her. She turned her head away with a sullen face and quickly went down the corridor. Michiru was watching out of the corner of her eye, and when she felt Haruka was gone she stood up and walked past an approaching Setsuna, who was confused by this. She lowered and shut the window’s metal curtain and turned her head to give Setsuna a sharp, bilious stare. Setsuna’s smile fell off her face, and she swallowed hard. Michiru quickly approached her at an uncomfortable distance, and even though Setsuna was taller than her, she was reasonably frightened.  
“What’s happening to her, Setsuna? You told me she might get sick, but I don’t recall you saying she could die!”  
“… It’s what happens when your being goes through a change too big, too fast at once. With the mirror, she was much more vulnerable to outer forces encircling her, and for better or worse their work was helping her remember her old self… I thought she’d just get a fever, or nightmares. I never imagined she’d get a heart…”  
Michiru interrupted her with a strong slap to the face; so strong she had to struggle not to trip, her long hair fluttering about. The heels did not make things easier when one of them broke and she had to quickly reach for the wall. She placed a hand on her cheek, feeling the sharp pain and breathing heavily, and Michiru had to massage her wrist as well.  
“To think we almost did get to kill her in the end … I could never live with myself if… For your sake she better make it through this!”  
Setsuna recomposed herself, first taking off her shoes with her feet and then standing up again with as much dignity as possible, her hair a mess.  
“I understand.” she muttered, looking down.  
“Once I get home, the first thing I’m going to do is get rid of that accursed mirror!”  
Setsuna was distraught, and quickly rose from her sheepish behavior to exclaim:  
“Michiru, that mirror is the heirloom of your many lives! You can’t…”  
Setsuna cut short her speech when she saw Michiru raise her hand again, and shut her eyes in anticipation to what was coming. When nothing happened, she dared a peek and saw an angry Michiru hanging her shaking arm in the air and breathing heavily.  
“Do you want to try the other cheek?” Setsuna asked nervously, shaking “It’s still fresh…”  
Michiru slowly lowered her arm, still angry. She turned around to look at Hotaru once more.  
“Is she going to be alright…?”  
Setsuna looked at Hotaru as well, but didn’t answer.  
Michiru quickly turned around and urged:  
“Answer me, woman!”  
“I don’t know, Michiru! I don’t know everything either!” Setsuna finally bursted, worn of the shock and the pressure, feeling guilt-ridden. A little calmer, she continued “I just don’t know… It’ll be up to her.”  
Michiru looked down and hugged herself. She turned around and approached Hotaru’s bed, sliding her hand on her shoulder before holding it.  
Setsuna looked at her worriedly, not bearing any ill-will against her. “She’s very strong… I have faith in her.”  
“Setsuna… the sound of your voice is grating on my nerves; I don’t think I even want to look at you right now… I would appreciate if you avoided running into me for the time being. You may leave now.”  
Setsuna stood quietly in her corner. Then picked up her shoes and was about to see herself out of the room and down the hallway. She couldn’t resist, however, looking back at Michiru and Hotaru one last time before she left.  
Haruka saw her when she passed by the entrance, barefooted. Though she thought it strange for Setsuna to be leaving, she figured she would just grab a new pair of shoes and return. ‘Yup, wore those once. Never again.’ She thought dismissively.  
She was waiting by the staff door for the tea to heat up, with one of the receptionists on her time off doing the favor. This receptionist was a small, fragile, pretty young thing that Haruka wouldn’t mind showing a thing or two to. She was quite pleased that working her charms on her had worked so well, forgetting her troubles a little. The receptionist introduced herself as Sayuki, and told her how she was the talk of the night shift thanks to her heroic “operation”, delicately placing her hand over her arm. ‘Man, I wish Michi was still in the palm of my hand like this.’ When Sayuri grabbed the tea box, she was impressed it was white tea and praised Haruka’s class, even though the latter was clueless. She hinted how she’d love one right now, and Haruka only snickered in her mind. But now that Setsuna was gone, she thought she’d “honor” Sayuri for her kindness, telling her that the third cup was for her all along “of course”.  
When she made it to Hotaru’s room upstairs, bringing the tea cups on a plastic violet pladder, Michiru looked at her with hostility. Haruka was frightened again, wondering if she had a sixth sense and knew what she’s been up to.  
“I already told you I don’t want anything.”  
“Gee Michi, hi! I love you too! I brought you tea this time.”  
“Tea!? On a plastic cup?”  
“So sorry. Guess your health-insurance isn’t as good as you think it is, eh?” then she remembered what Sayuki told her “It’s white tea. Very special you know…”  
Michiru winced, but soon sighed and approached Haruka to pick her cup. She closed her eyes and “reluctantly” conceded:  
“How thoughtful of you.”  
Haruka praised victory in her mind, imagining a little her clenching her fist and thrusting her arm down.  
“I know, right?”  
Michiru tasted the tea by smell first, as usual.  
“My favourite…. Very rare, very expensive… How did you know?” She sipped it, both hands on the cup, not taking her eyes off Haruka.  
“Oh, Setsuna brought them… Ah, shoo!” Haruka snapped her fingers “I missed the chance to say it was all me, didn’t I?  
Michiru finished her first sip and put the cup down.  
“Oh… What’s done is done.”

***

Hotaru was having another dream.  
At first, she was floating in front of an endless crowd that stretched as far as the horizon, all eyes on her. Then she began to see their faces up close, one by one, in quick sucession, endlessly; all strangers. Children, old people, couples; some happy, some sad, some hopeful, some furious, some tired, some crying… And she knew that they were people whose lives she almost finished, permanently; their children dead, and the children of their children, and their future with them. Almost, and yet her soul didn’t feel any less heavy.  
To drain her further, she was now concomitantly sitting on a throne as Sailor Saturn, her glaive held next to her, and in front of her an extended pit that was being piled up by the slashed and torned bodies of the people she saw, while the new faces appearing that she could still see were soon joining the others. They all kept falling, like sweet lotus petals, their liveless arms and legs dancing about…  
“I’m sorry…I’m sorry…I’m sorry… I’m sorry…I’m sorry…I’m sorry…!”  
“Hush, my dear. You’re only exerting yourself more.”  
Michiru placed her hand over her burning brow, and it further upset her that the wet washcloth didn’t seem to be helping at all. Hotaru was quiet now.  
“Can you hear me, Hotaru? You can’t let your past take over your present. That’s what I tried to protect you from.” Michiru doused the washcloth in water, squeezed it, then placed it on her brow again. “The past is made up of ghosts, and they have only as much power as you give them.”  
‘Ugh, what am I saying? She doesn’t need anyone waxing pastiche poetics on her…’ Michiru thought, resting her eyebrow on her hand. Then she looked up again  
“Hotaru, if I could carry your cross for you, I would. But it’s your fight alone, and you can’t lose…! It wouldn’t be fair…”  
Tears began to get in her way, and Michiru was starting to despise them very much.  
“If not for me, do it for your real mother! You would break her heart if you showed up in heaven so soon, you know!”  
The electrocardiogram carried on its incessant beeping, and Michiru sighed and adjusted herself by her seat. Calmer, she looked down and continued:  
“When I saw you at the clinic with your father… It all seemed so sad. Everyone had a happy ending, except you… And your father. Was I really so selfish? A “hypocrite”?” she thought a little, retracing her steps just prior the start of those six years, and placed a hand over her cheek “I guess I am. I never thought that of all people you’d be the one to know me so well.” she snickered “It makes sense, since I dropped my guard on you the most.” she removed her hand from her face and looked up at Hotaru “But I wonder. What would you have done if you were in my place?”  
“Are you scolding sick girls again?”  
Haruka hanged her arm on the door frame and rested her head over it. Michiru wiped a single tear from her cheek and turned around to protest:  
“Don’t you knock on the door anymore, Haruka?”  
“I heard you screaming, and I came to check… It’s not fair to argue with people who can’t answer, you know.” Haruka let go of the frame and straightened up “Look, Michiru, I’m sold. She means a lot to you. I’ll do anything in my power to keep her safe for you. No more speeding with sports car, or whatever.”  
“Oh, now you’re going to help? Took you long enough…” Michiru crossed her arms, turning her head back to Hotaru.  
“But” Haruka resumed her train of thought “it’s been almost two days now… We’ve already done everything there was to do. She’s being watched by the best there is, given every comfort. Staying here, loosing sleep, and starting to smell is not helping her.”  
“Can you be so sure?” Michiru asked, not looking her way.  
Haruka hanged her head; she was frustrated at having to face the old brickwall stubbornness again.  
“If you want to go, go ahead” Michiru continued.  
“I’ve already gone home twice and you didn’t even notice… You know I won’t leave you alone for long.”  
“Please, don’t stay here because of me; I don’t need you to… In fact, I want you to go away.”  
“Can you be so sure…?”  
Michiru turned to face Haruka, raising an eyebrow.  
“I thought you’d say something like that, so I brought some of your clothes with me. I don’t see any problem in using this room’s shower for yourself, do you?”  
“I…”  
Haruka quickly interrupted her before she could be any more of a downer.  
“You can stay away from her for two minutes, right!? While I watch over her? I’ll yell if anything goes wrong. Now there’s a thought; I’d love to see you rushing out of the shower, soaking wet…”  
“Haruka… Do you know why I’m so cranky? It’s because it’s exhausting being the only one in a relationship that tries to behave like a grownup.”  
“Oh? And I was just about to ask you to drop everything and come away with me. Why don’t you ask Setsuna for help then, huh? Where is she anyway? What have you been up to now, Miss Grownup?”  
Michiru was too tired to start an argument, and was about to wittily tell her that it was none of her business. But in the time she took to concoct something, Haruka had fetched another chair and brought it over next to her, sitting squarely on it.  
“There, isn’t it great? Just like old times.” Haruka grabbed Michiru’s farthest shoulder and pulled her tightly next to her “A big, happy family; that’s what you always wanted isn’t it?” Haruka said in a tone that mixed anger, irony, and excitement all in one.  
The electrocardiogram kept making its noise as the happy family was together. Haruka stretched her fingers to fiddle with Michiru’s hair, and the minute she touched them, she complained again:  
“I’m getting really tired of the way you’re pulling me, you know?”  
“Oh? Then get some sleep, my love. You know, those black eyes you got there give you an all special charm: Michiru, the worriesome maiden, driven to the brink of her wits. Who will be brave, or unsuspecting enough to grab her by the hand and escort her away to paradise on their bodacious white horse? Did I get that right? “Bodacious”? I can see why you like fancy words so much.”  
“I don’t need this…”  
“Hey, I got what you need right here! And I won’t deny it: living with you bites sometimes. But the thrill of being around you, the feeling of dying everyday… what a rush. It’s like going up to heaven, then coming back alive.  
“Haruka, I want a divorce.”  
“We never married, honey.”  
“Oh, right…”  
Michiru rested her head on Haruka’s shoulder.  
“Did you get that epiphany out of a song again?”  
“Only the last verse. I’m improving.”  
Michiru sighed, and looked at Hotaru, who seemed to be so tranquil.  
“Haruka…”  
“Yes, baby.”  
Michiru raised her head and tilted closer to her lover, fixing and dusting off her mustard jacket lovingly.  
“Back when we were home…”  
“…Yeah?”  
Then she tightened her grip around the lapels, pulling Haruka closer and looking quite angrily at her, which made her swallow hard.  
“If something had happened to her, I would’ve personally made sure you’d end up in jail and hanged by one of your cellmates.”  
Haruka almost wanted to laugh, feeling there was little left in her life to salvage anyway.  
“You always knew how to make a girl feel wanted…”  
Then Michiru sank her face in Haruka’s chest.  
“Thank you, Haruka!”  
Haruka was surprised again, and had to undergo another mood adjustment. She placed a hand over Michiru’s nape, past her hair to caress it. Sadly, she stated:  
“Anything for you.”

***


End file.
